# Understanding Kiwi, much?



## Weta

Have you found your Kiwi ears? Do yours sometimes do a double-take and cause you to have some embarrasingly long pauses for a moment to think long and hard about what is being asked or said? 

Today someone asked me would I like some peer. Some peer? Do I want a pier? 


No, not right now, I don't think I do! 


Then I saw it, it was a piece of fruit, a pear!


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## anski

Weta said:


> Have you found your Kiwi ears? Do yours sometimes do a double-take and cause you to have some embarrasingly long pauses for a moment to think long and hard about what is being asked or said?
> 
> Today someone asked me would I like some peer. Some peer? Do I want a pier?
> 
> 
> No, not right now, I don't think I do!
> 
> 
> Then I saw it, it was a piece of fruit, a pear!


Kiwi's probably feel the same about certain accents from other countries.

I will never forget as a new arrival to Glasgow & working in a shop I was asked by a customer for a "POKE" luckily a Scots lass stepped in (realising I would not know what she meant) & helped me out. 

Wonder how many of you know what the customer was asking me?


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## masibabes

size of a portion or could be poke of chips; like a handful
but of course depends on which part of Scotland, it might has different meanings

i.e. - like in Dumfries, it means a bag of chips at fish and chips shop; they use brown paper bags thats the actually poke


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## Guest

We have to be more attentive to understand fully the Kiwi's, but the more popular
phrases are a doddle, Awesome; Gud Job and of course Cool.

Has anyone else noticed how Americanised the NZ shop staff are, Have a Good Day and How
are you doing to day etc etc. They never leave you alone, reminds you of the UK's Perfume staff 
chasing you about the store trying to spray scent on you.


BUT loving it here everyone has been so friendly and helpful,


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## bleater

Trust me, it's not just the expats who can't understand the New Zealand accent sometimes.

First day back in NZ after 3 years away, in a supermarket:
Check-out operator: "Hue ayr yew".
Me: "Ummm, I'm Philip. I'm your customer".
Check-out operator: "No no no HUE ayr yew".
Me: (Long pause). "Ummmmm..."
Me: (Sudden clarity): "Oh.... HOW am I? I'm well, thanks!"

Anyway, this should help...


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## CaroG

I've been with my Kiwi husband for nearly 5 years and I still have long pauses before my brain kicks in and I understand what he just said!!!


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## Guest

CaroG that's just your selective hearing kicking into gear.

Carole has just started at the Girls High School and the Secretary said she would have 
sort out what to my UK ear was Celery, of course she had said Salary. Made me laugh
so much for me understanding Kiwi.


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## G-Mo

anski said:


> Kiwi's probably feel the same about certain accents from other countries.
> 
> I will never forget as a new arrival to Glasgow & working in a shop I was asked by a customer for a "POKE" luckily a Scots lass stepped in (realising I would not know what she meant) & helped me out.
> 
> Wonder how many of you know what the customer was asking me?


POKE is a small packet of something, e.g. a wee poke of sweets; although my mate from Dumfries insists the POKE is the paper bag.


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## G-Mo

I've been living with a Kiwi for over a decade, although her accent has softened from being outside NZ (UK and Canada) for over 10 years... I has my sister's fresh off the boat ex-partner about for 4 years, he was a South Island Maori, learned a whole new world of kiwi through that... But, if I have to be honest, everything I know about Kiwi language, I've learned from bro'Town!!! Sweet as! 8D


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## topcat83

You can't get worse than some of the parts of the Midlands of England. Wolverhampton and the Black Country come to mind.

Hubby (who is from Loughborough) took me and the boys (all Londoners) to Dudley, where we visited a local MacDonalds. I ordered two childrens meals, two 'Big Macs' and two cups of tea. 

Girl with studs in eyebrow behind the counter mumbled something that ended in 'Tay'.

I asked her to repeat what she'd said four times - still without any kind of understanding.

Hubby comes up and says 'For goodness sake, she's asking you if you want milk and sugar with the tea!'


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## topcat83

...and must post these classic Youtube snippets.

No 1 is two Glaswegians stuck in a lift...






No 2 is a recent New Zealand ad encouraging local youth not to drink and drive... it has a cult following


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## G-Mo

Ghost chups.


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## topcat83

G-Mo said:


> Ghost chups.


Only those that have watched the video clips know what you're talking about!


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## anski

topcat83 said:


> You can't get worse than some of the parts of the Midlands of England. Wolverhampton and the Black Country come to mind.
> 
> Hubby (who is from Loughborough) took me and the boys (all Londoners) to Dudley, where we visited a local MacDonalds. I ordered two childrens meals, two 'Big Macs' and two cups of tea.
> 
> Girl with studs in eyebrow behind the counter mumbled something that ended in 'Tay'.
> 
> I asked her to repeat what she'd said four times - still without any kind of understanding.
> 
> Hubby comes up and says 'For goodness sake, she's asking you if you want milk and sugar with the tea!'


I must admit when I first arrived in NZ I thought the (Maori's at least I think they were) were from South Africa & I kept asking if they were, but I was wrong.

Yesterday in Washington DC the checkout operator talked to me in fact I could not shut her up but try as I might I could not understand her, must have forgotten to switch the hearing aid on


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## anski

topcat83 said:


> ...and must post these classic Youtube snippets.
> 
> No 1 is two Glaswegians stuck in a lift...
> 
> Scottish trapped in the lift. Reason - Their accent - YouTube
> 
> No 2 is a recent New Zealand ad encouraging local youth not to drink and drive... it has a cult following
> 
> Legend - Drink Driving - YouTube



Sorry just need to pick myself up from the floor I can relate to the Scottish one 100%

When I first arrived in Glasgow in 1965 with a South African accent no one could understand me & I certainly could not understand THEM.

They called the police POLIS but that is the name of a beautiful place in Cyprus.


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## carosapien

G-Mo said:


> Ghost chups.


That one's so funny isn't it  it's given rise to a whole load of spin offs. Seen the film now get the tee shirt.










The best is still Beached Whale from years ago , where of course it all started. Master this and you can really start to learn Kiwi


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## carosapien

Weta said:


> Have you found your Kiwi ears? Do yours sometimes do a double-take and cause you to have some embarrasingly long pauses for a moment to think long and hard about what is being asked or said?
> 
> Today someone asked me would I like some peer. Some peer? Do I want a pier?
> 
> 
> No, not right now, I don't think I do!
> 
> 
> Then I saw it, it was a piece of fruit, a pear!



I was asked if the kids were going to a crash and being told I could take a fairy to work across the harbour.


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