# Being Gay in Dubai



## ashlee100 (Feb 4, 2015)

Hi all,

I am a 20-something gay woman in the process of relocating to Dubai.

I'm from Manchester so the fact that homosexuality is illegal in the UAE, worries me.

The job I'm being offered is an absolute dream and since I'm not in a relationship, I thought this was the perfect time.

What's the deal with this? Is this something I can mention to fellow expats when I first meet them?

I will fully respect the customs of the UAE but was wondering what it's like for my fellow gays in Dubai.

Any advice would be appreciated.

Thank you


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## Froglet (May 7, 2014)

Just keep your private life private and you'll be fine


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## Skip_ZA (Jan 28, 2015)

Im not in dubai but i know as much that if something is illegal in UAE and they catch you its jail time or deportation.

I would seriously keep this to myself or reconsider moving to dubai.

Also from what ive read UAE is not as liberal as many western countries, especially involving homosexuality.

I mean if you don't know already if you are unmarried (man and woman) and stay in the same hotel room and someone complains and they catch you its jail time or deportation.


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## sheributt (Feb 4, 2015)

i would suggest you never ever discuss this with non personal people as Dubai is very strict on this and once they know they can put the person in jail following deportation.


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## Gavtek (Aug 23, 2009)

For what it's worth, heterosexual women share apartments/hotel rooms all the time, no-one would bat an eyelid if you did the same so as long as you're reasonably discrete, you'll have no issues. 

Just don't go shouting it from the rooftops, seemingly reasonable, open-minded people here are still perfectly capable of being completely intolerant to stuff like this.


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## Hull-Heppy (Jun 21, 2014)

Listen to what he says above ^^^^^^


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## TallyHo (Aug 21, 2011)

Dubai probably has the biggest gay scene in the Middle East and is a mecca for gay Arabs. Half of Emirates cabin crew men seem to be gay. I know a number of gay men who are open with their friends and western coworkers. If you work for a Western owned company it's very unlikely to be an issue. 

What will get you in trouble is being very overt in a public space. No holding hands in the Dubai Mall, for example, or snogging sessions on the beach. Otherwise it's a place where if you keep it in the bedroom and don't make a public nuisance, you will not be affected (this same attitude applies to a lot of things out here, not just homosexuality). 

I can't tell you how much of a lesbian scene there is, but I have also met a few lesbians who worked in the UAE. They seemed happy enough. And I'm sure there's some interesting stories about what happens among some Emirati women in their majlis!


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## BedouGirl (Sep 15, 2011)

To add my two fils. Listen to TallyHo and Gavtek. As for discussing anything with people, use common sense. If someone asks you if you are in a relationship, you say no. That's the truth, it's not necessary to wear your proverbial heart on your sleeve and tell all to people you don't know. Get to know someone and sound them out before you share anything of ANY nature, not just this, but anything. I would say that's advice that stands fair anywhere in the world.


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## ashlee100 (Feb 4, 2015)

Thanks so much to everyone for your advice. 

I won't be shouting it from the rooftops, don't worry. I was just wondering about how to play it.

You've all been really helpful- this won't put me off living my dreams


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## Bloomindale (Jun 22, 2014)

ashlee100 said:


> Thanks so much to everyone for your advice.
> 
> I won't be shouting it from the rooftops, don't worry. I was just wondering about how to play it.
> 
> You've all been really helpful- this won't put me off living my dreams


Which dream you referring to ?  
Anyway, good luck and be safe !


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## A.Abbass (Jun 28, 2014)

Why is it that gays are so keen on telling others they are gay ? Too many posts asking whether they could "tell". I mean when I meet new people I don't tell them I'm straight.

Nobody would ask you, hence you won't need to tell anyone, I believe.


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## Edino (Sep 22, 2013)

Totally agree with Tallyho. 

Keep it low profile and you can have a happy life / social life here.


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## TallyHo (Aug 21, 2011)

I don't think it's so much an issue of wanting everyone to know they're gay.

The point is if you're not familiar with the region, you may very well have concerns about taking a job offer in Dubai because of the prevailing stereotype that homosexuality is not tolerated in the Middle East, and not only that, the punishments are severe. And the unfortunate truth is that for many surrounding countries, people who are caught in homosexual acts, or even merely suspected of being homosexual, have been imprisoned and badly treated. A few months ago there was a video released showing ISIS in Iraq throwing suspected homosexuals off a building roof! While ISIS is certainly the extreme, countries like Saudi don't have a great track record either. 

So I understand a potential expat coming on here and asking questions about tolerance in the UAE. And truth be told, such threads do not happen often. Much more common is the 'can I live with my girlfriend/boyfriend outside marriage' threads where everyone says the same: keep it discreet, don't be a nuisance, you'll be fine. They don't conduct witch hunts for unmarried couples even though the law says it's illegal. 



A.Abbass said:


> Why is it that gays are so keen on telling others they are gay ? Too many posts asking whether they could "tell". I mean when I meet new people I don't tell them I'm straight.
> 
> Nobody would ask you, hence you won't need to tell anyone, I believe.


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## Mr Rossi (May 16, 2009)

A.Abbass said:


> Why is it that gays are so keen on telling others they are gay ? Too many posts asking whether they could "tell". I mean when I meet new people I don't tell them I'm straight.


I think the OP was seeking more realistic advice on what he could possibly expect than what could be garnered from the UK media. It's not just partner preferences, I've met people that think I live in a massive penthouse, spend most of my days on yachts and yet run the risk of being taking hostage each time I pop out to Spinneys*

* You mean you have supermarkets there?

No, before I spend the day on my 30 berth cabin cruiser, I visit this guy in a hut who sells me fresh milk straight from the camel and flat bread baked on a rock with the desert sun.


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## arabianhorse (Nov 13, 2013)

Mr Rossi said:


> I've met people that think I live in a massive penthouse, spend most of my days on yachts ...*
> 
> .


You mean you don't?

Wow - you have my sympathies. 

You should try applying for a government job. They pay really well and you can work remotely from your yacht and no one will be the wiser.


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## A.Abbass (Jun 28, 2014)

TallyHo said:


> I don't think it's so much an issue of wanting everyone to know they're gay.
> 
> The point is if you're not familiar with the region, you may very well have concerns about taking a job offer in Dubai because of the prevailing stereotype that homosexuality is not tolerated in the Middle East, and not only that, the punishments are severe. And the unfortunate truth is that for many surrounding countries, people who are caught in homosexual acts, or even merely suspected of being homosexual, have been imprisoned and badly treated. A few months ago there was a video released showing ISIS in Iraq throwing suspected homosexuals off a building roof! While ISIS is certainly the extreme, countries like Saudi don't have a great track record either.
> 
> So I understand a potential expat coming on here and asking questions about tolerance in the UAE. And truth be told, such threads do not happen often. Much more common is the 'can I live with my girlfriend/boyfriend outside marriage' threads where everyone says the same: keep it discreet, don't be a nuisance, you'll be fine. They don't conduct witch hunts for unmarried couples even though the law says it's illegal.


I would have to disagree, these posts are quite often imho. Just use the advanced search and search for 'Gay" in the Dubai section. All similar posts are in the same context as well.

It's also obvious for all of us UAE is way different than Saudi Arabia.

So my advice as an arab who has been been born and raised in UAE and worked in nearly all GCC countries as well, while as you mentioned tolerance for homosexuality in the region is not there, most people don't really care much as long as you keep things discrete. What I notice is that gays ARE keen to show off their sexual orientation. I myself for example noticed a few guys in Dubai mall during very busy days clearly trying to tell everyone they are gay. I have seen loads of gays in different GCC countries showing PDA as well in public places, now these are the kind of acts that will put you in trouble definitely.

So I don't think it's only a forum thing.


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## BedouGirl (Sep 15, 2011)

Mr Rossi said:


> I think the OP was seeking more realistic advice on what he could possibly expect than what could be garnered from the UK media. It's not just partner preferences,
> 
> I think OP is a lady, not a man.


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## twowheelsgood (Feb 21, 2013)

ashlee100 said:


> I'm from Manchester so the fact that homosexuality is illegal in the UAE, worries me


If you were from Liverpool, would it not worry you then ? 

Low profile, never tell anyone and you'll be fine.

Every person you tell is a risk and all it takes is someone to inadvertently say that someone in the office is gay, and another to work it out, have a big argument with you and one phone call is all it takes. You'll find Gulf News often has 'retaliation' cases in the news where one insulted party snitches on the other about something illegal.


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## arabianhorse (Nov 13, 2013)

C'mon guys. This whole thread is a farce. We all know there are no gay people in the UAE.
To all the gays wanting to come here, I say good luck. You are indeed alone.


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## nstates (Mar 24, 2015)

Would it be possible for someone to give me an idea on how to befriend non-straight females here in Dubai. I have been living here for over a year and have no idea on how to find like minded women.


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## The Rascal (Aug 6, 2014)

Hang out with a load of female Emiratis...


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## Gavtek (Aug 23, 2009)

Apps like Badoo and Tinder work here to a certain extent, not sure if the gay one (Grindr I think?) does or not, but there are ways around it if not. 

You may also have some luck with the global websites like Match or PlentyOfFish if you use a vee-pee-enn.


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## LesFroggitts (Dec 30, 2013)

Females only activities such as the Gym/Spa may provide a fair hunting ground.


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