# Purpose of nannies



## nat_c (Mar 7, 2010)

Now I have no children so not really an expert on what a nannies duties are, but I thought a nanny basically is hired to look after children. A live in nanny I would have thought would become part of the family.

What I have seen so many times here is a nanny is treat more like a slave. For example tonight we go out and play bowling. A small Indian family is next to us, mother, father and 2 small kids. All 4 of them are happily playing and they have brought along their nanny who is sat on the seats on the next lane to them watching them whilst she looks utterly miserable wearing some silly looking overalls type uniform. 

Surely if she is hired to look after the kids or become part of the family she should either be allowed to join in or the fmaily should have the decency to let her do her own thing as the parents are more than capable of spending time with their kids and looking after them??

Is it a type of power/status thing that people have here, I can afford a nanny I'll go walk around the mall and show how cool I am?

Just seems so wrong

Rant over


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## wandabug (Apr 22, 2010)

Really they are maids not nannies. I know it may look like slavery to you but these women are earning 5 times the average wage back home with accommodation included. Not saying it's right but for many of them it is a much better life. However, unfortunately, some maids are treated badly. Personally I do not have a maid but most of my friends do, the maids have stayed at Yas Hotel for Christmas, Meydan Hotel for the opening night, Atlantis Hotel and dined at Jumeirah Beach Hotel - more than many expats get to do!. I know one maid that has saved up to buy a second hand laptop, is on facebook and skypes home.


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## Free_Spirit (Aug 30, 2009)

nat_c said:


> Is it a type of power/status thing that people have here, I can afford a nanny I'll go walk around the mall and show how cool I am?
> 
> Just seems so wrong
> 
> Rant over


Not all families are treating their maids/nannies like that. First of all in UAE nanny is rarely just looking after the kid, traditionally they clean the house and sometimes cook too. And as mentioned above they are paid well in comparison with what they can earn back home. You won't believe, I know several people from Sri Lanka and India, who built villas back home, but here in Dubai they earn peanuts (for us peanuts, for them it's not).
Our nanny/maid for example is well treated. After we are back from work, we let her have rest in her room (to specify - big bedroom with bathroom and windows) or go out to her friend's place for dinner. During weekdays she's looking after our daughter, cleaning the house and cooking only for the baby. We give her good money on the top of her salary if she's doing overtime. 
I know in US for example maid costs huge money, here in Gulf it's normal and affordable, so it's not about slavery, but rather about giving jobs to those who can't earn money otherwise.


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## pamela0810 (Apr 5, 2010)

nat_c said:


> Is it a type of power/status thing that people have here, I can afford a nanny I'll go walk around the mall and show how cool I am?
> 
> Just seems so wrong
> 
> Rant over


Yes, it is a status thing. There are a lot of threads on this forum discussing the treatment of nannies/housekeepers in Dubai. They are underpaid and treated miserably yet people try to justify their behaviour by saying, "Oh, they are way better off out here than they are back home." Honestly, how can someone be better off if they are treated like slaves, made to work odd hours and paid next to nothing. Yes, they earn more than what they would've back home, but it comes at a hefty price.

This general inhumane treatment of nannies disgusts me and I've said this several times. If you trust your nanny enough to leave your kids with them, how could they not become a part of your family? And how on earth do you expect them to treat your children properly if you don't treat them with basic human respect?!


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## stewart (Jun 21, 2009)

They are only for the lazy pompas fools.


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## Elphaba (Jan 24, 2008)

stewart said:


> They are only for the lazy pompas fools.


Don't be silly.

It is not lazy to employ someone to assist wth housework if you are busy doing other things.
-


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## Dazcat (Aug 7, 2008)

pamela0810 said:


> Yes, it is a status thing. There are a lot of threads on this forum discussing the treatment of nannies/housekeepers in Dubai. They are underpaid and treated miserably yet people try to justify their behaviour by saying, "Oh, they are way better off out here than they are back home." Honestly, how can someone be better off if they are treated like slaves, made to work odd hours and paid next to nothing. Yes, they earn more than what they would've back home, but it comes at a hefty price.
> 
> This general inhumane treatment of nannies disgusts me and I've said this several times. If you trust your nanny enough to leave your kids with them, how could they not become a part of your family? And how on earth do you expect them to treat your children properly if you don't treat them with basic human respect?!


As someone above has already stated, not every nannie is tret badly! 

We have a nannie, she starts at 0730 and finishes at 1730, and has weekends off where she goes to visit & stays with friends all weekend. We think very highly of her and treat her with the upmost respect. 
As regards with taking a nannie to the bowling alley, or anywhere for that matter, we always ask our nannie if she would like to come along, more often than not she declines but on the odd occasion she joins us for walks etc. Please do not tarnish everyone with the same brush!!!!


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## pamela0810 (Apr 5, 2010)

Dazcat said:


> As someone above has already stated, not every nannie is tret badly!
> 
> We have a nannie, she starts at 0730 and finishes at 1730, and has weekends off where she goes to visit & stays with friends all weekend. We think very highly of her and treat her with the upmost respect.
> As regards with taking a nannie to the bowling alley, or anywhere for that matter, we always ask our nannie if she would like to come along, more often than not she declines but on the odd occasion she joins us for walks etc. Please do not tarnish everyone with the same brush!!!!



You are then one of only a handful of people who treat their nanny this way. I know a lot of people who have made their nannies a part of their family but I have also seen and witnessed several horror stories as well. There are a lot of people who claim to treat their nannies very well and they probably do so, but I would hardly imagine someone in their right mind openly admitting to abusing their nanny on a public forum either.


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## Dazcat (Aug 7, 2008)

pamela0810 said:


> You are then one of only a handful of people who treat their nanny this way. I know a lot of people who have made their nannies a part of their family but I have also seen and witnessed several horror stories as well. There are a lot of people who claim to treat their nannies very well and they probably do so, but I would hardly imagine someone in their right mind openly admitting to abusing their nanny on a public forum either.


Ive no doubt that there are people who treat their nanies poorly, and whilst it doesnt make it right, there will be a similar amount of nannies who get tret as they should! All i was saying is you cannot tarnish everyone with a nannie by saying they are all tret badly.....


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## stewart (Jun 21, 2009)

pamela0810 said:


> You are then one of only a handful of people who treat their nanny this way. I know a lot of people who have made their nannies a part of their family but I have also seen and witnessed several horror stories as well. There are a lot of people who claim to treat their nannies very well and they probably do so, but I would hardly imagine someone in their right mind openly admitting to abusing their nanny on a public forum either.


:clap2:


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## Dazcat (Aug 7, 2008)

stewart said:


> :clap2:


Whats to clap about?

To state that 'only a handful of people treat there nannies this way (well)'' is a ridiculous statement.


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## pamela0810 (Apr 5, 2010)

Dazcat said:


> Whats to clap about?
> 
> To state that 'only a handful of people treat there nannies this way (well)'' is a ridiculous statement.


Try saying that to the countless houskeepers/maids/nannies who have tried escaping from their employers and are stuck in the different embassies and consulates because they have no way out. That's ridiculous.


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## Mr Rossi (May 16, 2009)

Keep your maid active by getting the kids tanked up on e numbers, sugar and keeping them awake until after midnight. Go to the mall, and let the kids loose with firm instructions to the maid not to discipline or reprimand the children. The more the kids act up, the more interest you should take in Louis Vuitton, Chanel etc.


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## Jynxgirl (Nov 27, 2009)

There is a certain other site, that is women. They have very interesting and sad discussions about their nannies/maids. The stories of the maid not wanting to eat dinner with them so they have built a make shift kitchen outside in their carport area. That the maid had the audacity to say something about the wife looking not so good for her husband and thus had to send the maid back. That a maid wanted to use their computer to call back to her kids but not sure if should do that as will think they should get in the way of her chores. They discuss being too nice to the nanny/maid and having to get a new one if they dont know their place. The responses about these things should just sicken a person, but instead they talk about them like they are some dog who they need to decide if they should give a bone to or if a bone will 'ruin' them. What amazes me, is for the most part no one sticks up for the maids/nannies or says anything about this behavior. And this is a western british mainly expat site!!!!!!


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## Dazcat (Aug 7, 2008)

pamela0810 said:


> Try saying that to the countless houskeepers/maids/nannies who have tried escaping from their employers and are stuck in the different embassies and consulates because they have no way out. That's ridiculous.


Agreed, but my point is that there is ALOT more than just a ''handful of people'' who treat their maids well!!


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## Andy Capp (Oct 5, 2008)

Jynx,
Re "maid" using their computer, I wouldn't want someone else to, now getting her a cheap second hand one and letting her use that is fair enough, but not mine.
And that site is notorious for trolls and Jumeriah Janes - I was banned a long time ago for saying things they didn't like - as have other people on this and other forums.
The Daily Mail often pick up on stories from there to publish too, sadly a lot of it is total bollocks.
At least you know where you are with us.
We call a spade a shovel!


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## cautious_mover (Dec 9, 2009)

Never underestimate the housemaids.

They join a western expat family, over time a rift develops between husband and wife. Wife gets jealous. Eventually wife goes back home to visit family. Meanwhile the husband gets lonely in Dubai. Bingo ! The maid is on hand to provide the comfort feeling.

Wife comes back, detects something not right, leaves and files for divorce.

Maid jumps in, new relationship with the man. She gets the full expat experience and a new husband.

Look around next time you are out.....so many cases in front of your eyes....


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## Jynxgirl (Nov 27, 2009)

Mover... Mover, Mover, Mover. The women folk are not going to like that one! 

I think a male maid/nanny is in order if I should ever feel the need that I cant cope. Hate to think that my monkey sex partner would get stolen away. Thank you for that informative post.


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## cautious_mover (Dec 9, 2009)

Jynxgirl said:


> Mover... Mover, Mover, Mover. The women folk are not going to like that one!
> 
> I think a male maid/nanny is in order if I should ever feel the need that I cant cope. Hate to think that my monkey sex partner would get stolen away. Thank you for that informative post.


Like it or not, it happens a lot. Not only here in Dubai....Singapore is another classic "maid steals husband' country. I know of 2 cases.

I am only stating what happens. And its quite common.


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## Elphaba (Jan 24, 2008)

Maids 'steal' husbands? Husbands are not possessions. Sadly, some men are pathetic enough to want an acquiescent little wife, so dump the first (Western) wife, usually mother of their children, for a second who will treat them as a tin god. A situation that is really not much different to the old cliche of the man going off with his secretary.

So many cliches, so many generalisations 

There are good employers, as well as bad ones. There are bad maids, as well as good ones.

In my opinion, too many people move here and take on staff of some sort, without the faintest idea how to treat them. An employee is not family, but does deserve fair pay, fair hours, good treatment and respect.
-


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## cautious_mover (Dec 9, 2009)

Elphaba said:


> Maids 'steal' husbands? Husbands are not possessions. Sadly, some men are pathetic enough to want an acquiescent little wife, so dump the first (Western) wife, usually mother of their children, for a second who will treat them as a tin god. A situation that is really not much different to the old cliche of the man going off with his secretary.
> 
> So many cliches, so many generalisations
> 
> ...


In my opinion, too many people move here generally !


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## Mr Rossi (May 16, 2009)

Elphaba said:


> So many cliches, so many generalisations


Husband stuck in a joyless, nagging, sexless marriage for 20 years realises life is finite and starts to live it?


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## Free_Spirit (Aug 30, 2009)

cautious_mover said:


> Never underestimate the housemaids.
> 
> They join a western expat family, over time a rift develops between husband and wife. Wife gets jealous. Eventually wife goes back home to visit family. Meanwhile the husband gets lonely in Dubai. Bingo ! The maid is on hand to provide the comfort feeling.
> 
> ...


Don't hire 19 years old French model and that's all


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## Elphaba (Jan 24, 2008)

Mr Rossi said:


> Husband stuck in a joyless, nagging, sexless marriage for 20 years realises life is finite and starts to live it?


Woman stuck in joyless marriage with dull man who has no spirit is glad to see the back of him? 
-


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## cautious_mover (Dec 9, 2009)

Elphaba said:


> Woman stuck in joyless marriage with dull man who has no spirit is glad to see the back of him?
> -


Western women dont cut their husbands toenails.....


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## Jynxgirl (Nov 27, 2009)

We can see where this one is going... :eyebrows:


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## Elphaba (Jan 24, 2008)

cautious_mover said:


> Western women dont cut their husbands toenails.....


Damn right they don't. Eurgh! 
-


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## cautious_mover (Dec 9, 2009)

Elphaba said:


> Damn right they don't. Eurgh!
> -


Well - thats exactly why Western men go for Asian women. Because they like the care and attention...


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## Elphaba (Jan 24, 2008)

cautious_mover said:


> Well - thats exactly why Western men go for Asian women. Because they like the care and attention...


Translation - because they are too pathetic to do things for themselves & need the ego boost.
-


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## cautious_mover (Dec 9, 2009)

Elphaba said:


> Translation - because they are too pathetic to do things for themselves & need the ego boost.
> -


Wrong attitude to take Elph....


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## Elphaba (Jan 24, 2008)

cautious_mover said:


> Wrong attitude to take Elph....


I don't see why. It's one point of view c_m

As I said earlier, little different from middle-aged man running off with his much younger secretary.


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## Jynxgirl (Nov 27, 2009)

Those women dont like to do it either but a womens got to do, what a womens got to do (unless you dont have to of course).


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## SBP (Jan 4, 2010)

I got bollocked for far less


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## dizzyizzy (Mar 30, 2008)

Please stick to the topic and don't bring issues that don't belong here.

Thank you.


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## Andy Capp (Oct 5, 2008)

cautious_mover said:


> Sorry...what was the topic ?  Dizzy - I cant believe you deleted my thread regarding Hepatitis earlier ! So you would put the rules of the forum above common sense, protecting other peoples health and hygiene ? the guy admitted he has Hep and works in food service...in Dubai....I think an All Ports Bulletin would be the least response....


You're not being very cautious are you c_m....


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## Elphaba (Jan 24, 2008)

cautious_mover said:


> Sorry...what was the topic ?  Dizzy - I cant believe you deleted my thread regarding Hepatitis earlier ! So you would put the rules of the forum above common sense, protecting other peoples health and hygiene ? the guy admitted he has Hep and works in food service...in Dubai....I think an All Ports Bulletin would be the least response....


A friendly word - suggest you re-read the forum rules....
-


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## cautious_mover (Dec 9, 2009)

whatever...just shows that people have too much time on their hands...I guess thats Dubai ! Have a wonderful evening...


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## stewart (Jun 21, 2009)

cautious_mover said:


> whatever...just shows that people have too much time on their hands...I guess thats Dubai ! Have a wonderful evening...


We will thanks


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## dizzyizzy (Mar 30, 2008)

This discussion is more than a year old


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