# Mixed Race Families in Milan



## kazzking

Hi,

My husband (who is white) and I (I'm black) would like to make a permanent move to Italy, Milan in the near future. We have two daughters, aged 10 and 3. We live in Scotland (born in London, UK).

He has distant family in Alessandria as his Mother is half Italian, so we're hoping they will help us settle in.

My question is - are there many mixed raced families in Milan / Italy? In the past I've heard stories of racism but on the few visits I've made to Italy (Rome, Siena and Florence), I've not personally encountered any. I know racism exists everywhere but I'd rather my daughters weren't subjected to anything I could potentially avoid.

My husband is currently completing his Electrician qualifications and we are all learning Italian. Ideally, we'd like the girls to go to an Italian State School so they need some language skills before we arrive.

Any suggestions on areas and schools would also be appreciated.

Mucho Grazie


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## fab

kazzking said:


> My question is - are there many mixed raced families in Milan / Italy? In the past I've heard stories of racism but on the few visits I've made to Italy (Rome, Siena and Florence), I've not personally encountered any. I know racism exists everywhere but I'd rather my daughters weren't subjected to anything I could potentially avoid.


Hi,
I was born in Milan and have lived there for 35 years.
I am a consultant and traveled all around Italy and more.
I can tell you there isn't a more "open minded" city than Milan in Italy.
Actually, as you said you'll find an idiot wherever, Italy is not an exception to that rule.
Despite the news, most of Italians don't care about race, etc; on the other hand there are many IGNORANT people who think that all black people are from Senegal, and (for example) Morocco, Iraq or Lebanon is the same country and India and Pakistan are in perfect relationship. Not to mention that all the far east, from Korea (north or south is the same) to Indonesia, is China. And what about south America? They're all from Peru (big community in Milan). 
They've just learned Mexico is a country a couple of days ago because Italy lost a football match against Mexico 
Don't be afraid, just try to speak Italian to communicate and that's all.

fab


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## kazzking

Thanks for your reply. 

We'll definitely give it a go.

Ta
K


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## Flora

kazzking said:


> Hi,
> 
> My question is - are there many mixed raced families in Milan / Italy? In the past I've heard stories of racism but on the few visits I've made to Italy (Rome, Siena and Florence), I've not personally encountered any. I know racism exists everywhere but I'd rather my daughters weren't subjected to anything I could potentially avoid.
> 
> 
> Mucho Grazie


My dear I have two mixed race daughters myself, and i live in italy. What i can tell you is that in a big town like Milan what you are more likely to encounter is institutional racism. That means that your children will not have any black teachers, will not see themselves represented in any school materials, will never see their ethnicity celebrated as positive.
They will probably encounter also direct racism in the form of offensive remarks from other children, and the teachers do not have any training on how to deal with that. What I found is that most of the time they will just tell your children to put up with it, and not be sensitive about it. 
If you dare complain they will tell you you're being oversensitive or have a chip on your shoulders. 
This is quite hard to put up with if you come from the UK.
Also, since the majority of black people in italy are denied citizenship even if they are born here, your daughters will end up being treated as "immigrants" and "foreigners" even when they will speak perfect italian...
Even Italian-born black children get told to go back where they belong...
Also beware, because in the Milan area the ruling party is the xenophobic Northern League (Lega Nord), so you need to make extra sure to choose a multiethnic area and a school where your children will not be the only black kids in the class and also where the teachers will be simpathetic to their needs.
I can put you in touch with mothers of other mixed-race children in the Milan area who could give you some helpful advice on schools and areas to avoid as a mixed-family..
Racism is not a joke to be taken lightly especially when the self-esteem of your children is at stake. 
You could also talk to one of my friends, the mother of a mixed-race boy who moved from Novare to London due to the racism is son has been subject to in Novare all his life...
also I recommend you post your query on the forum of the website

attended by a great number of mothers of mixed-race children living in MIlan


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## kazzking

Hi,

Thanks so much for your reply, it has really got me thinking...

I would appreciate you putting me in touch with your friends/mixed raced mother's forum - the more advice I get the better!

Thanks again, hope to speak soon.
K


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## Flora

how do we get in touch, though? I am not allowed to post url to other websites here

I recommend you do google search first with the key word
afroitaliani
the first result that you will get is the blog of the association of parents of black and mixed-race children in italy, click on translate this page to get it in English, there is an email address to contact them, too.

then do a search with the word
insenegal org
and you will get the link to the portal on senegal in italy where there is a forum you may meet mothers of mixed-race children (but difficult to interact without the language)

otherwise, if you are on facebook, search for gruppo afroitaliani/e



kazzking said:


> Hi,
> 
> Thanks so much for your reply, it has really got me thinking...
> 
> I would appreciate you putting me in touch with your friends/mixed raced mother's forum - the more advice I get the better!
> 
> Thanks again, hope to speak soon.
> K


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## bfaye02

I am a black mom to my 3 year old son, and I am surprised to have read this. I am not in Milan so I can't speak of that but my son is in a public school in Bologna. He went in with more english then italian and now it's the other way around. We have both been well received there by all the parents, teachers, and helpers. I wonder though now, if it's because he is white with blue eyes, but despite that, it's easy to see that he's of a mixed race.. not the italian nose and hair a mixure of black and white (curly and thick). I have found Bologna in my experience a who cares about race place, though some seem to stare at times. When I first came here on vacation five/six years ago, I worried about racism and such, but now having lived here for a year, I don't think about it at all. Nor am I worried for my son.


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## jdphoenix

Hi,

I'm from South Africa and planning to move to Borgomaro next year. I'm also a bit concerned about racial issues but not too much though. What I would like to do is network with Blacks living in Italy already, and especially in the Borgomaro area. I would like to find out more about the area, and if you guys know anything about it, I'd love to hear from you. I'm pleased to see that you guys are taking the trials and tribulations in your stride, and wish you all the best!


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## jdphoenix

How about you guys starting blogs to tell Blacks what they can more or less expect when they move to Italy, and your own experiences over there? It sure would make for interesting reading. If you do, don't forget to give us details of your blog! I've just been to a website where expats from different countries list their blogs. This way you'll get readers who are looking for more info and interesting blogs to read. You can visit the site at: expatblog, click on the link for Italy to find all the different blogs for Italy.


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## Lonely

Flora said:


> Also, since the majority of black people in italy are denied citizenship even if they are born here


While I agree that lots of Italians are bigots, I cannot believe that's the case.

Yes, in Italy you need to grow a thick skin but remember that if you mix with the right people, you'll be eventually respected for who you are not for the colour of your skin.


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## pudd 2

Lonely said:


> While I agree that lots of Italians are bigots, I cannot believe that's the case.
> 
> Yes, in Italy you need to grow a thick skin but remember that if you mix with the right people, you'll be eventually respected for who you are not for the colour of your skin.


you are what you are whats the coulor of your bscin got to do with it be your self


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## ianthy

Hi - we do not have any kids but hubby is white and i am black. We are located near to Bologna for the last 8 years. We have not experienced any issues that we can put down to race. People are genuinely kind and helpful. On the other hand we have a couple of friends that have returned to Italy and now living in a small town on the outskirts of Rome - she is Italian and he is english - white. They speak of being overcharged in shops and treated differently to locals. Racism is about more than skin colour.


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## Lonely

ianthy said:


> Hi - we do not have any kids but hubby is white and i am black. We are located near to Bologna for the last 8 years. We have not experienced any issues that we can put down to race. People are genuinely kind and helpful. On the other hand we have a couple of friends that have returned to Italy and now living in a small town on the outskirts of Rome - she is Italian and he is english - white. They speak of being overcharged in shops and treated differently to locals. Racism is about more than skin colour.



That happens in many areas of the world.


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## Arturo.c

Lonely said:


> While I agree that lots of Italians are bigots, I cannot believe that's the case.


I don't agree with this statement, it's kind of painting everybody with a big brush. Bigotry can be found everywhere, even unexpectedly, but bigots in Italy are just a small but noisy minority of ignorant and fearful persons.

It should be remembered that in Italy lives quite a sizable number of black or mixed-ancestry Italians, some of which have risen to prominence and acquired celebrity status such as footballer Mario Balotelli, athletes such as Fiona May and Andrew Howe, beauty queens like Denny Méndez (Miss Italy 1996), TV newscasters like Fidel Mbanga-Bauna, actresses like Zeudi Araya, and so on.

Other dark-skinned American celebrities found a warm welcome and lots of admirers in Italy since the 1960s and 70s, and lived there for part of their lives, such as Lola Falana, Rocky Roberts, Edith Peters, and so on. 

There is also a small number of Italian politicians of African descent, such as Magdi Allam, Jean-Léonard Touadi and Dacia Valent (who was also a Member of the European Parliament). After the recent parliamentary elections, two more have joined the group gaining election to the Chamber of Deputies: Cécile Kyenge Kashetu and Khalid Chaouki.

True, in Italian schools there is yet no "Black Italian day" and no emphasis on "diversity", but episodes of race-based bullyism are not condoned either. If the teachers refuse to be pro-active about it, the principal should be notified. There is always the chance that some principals would be wary of "making waves" and upsetting the _statu quo_.

Besides that, some Milanese can't help being contemptuous of Italians from southern regions. I had a Neapolitan friend who worked in Milan. His car had Naples license plates, and he parked it on the street. He found it vandalized repeatedly until he got it re-registered.


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## Lonely

Arturo.c said:


> I don't agree with this statement, it's kind of painting everybody with a big brush. Bigotry can be found everywhere, even unexpectedly, but bigots in Italy are just a small but noisy minority of ignorant and fearful persons.
> 
> It should be remembered that in Italy lives quite a sizable number of black or mixed-ancestry Italians, some of which have risen to prominence and acquired celebrity status such as footballer Mario Balotelli, athletes such as Fiona May and Andrew Howe, beauty queens like Denny Méndez (Miss Italy 1996), TV newscasters like Fidel Mbanga-Bauna, actresses like Zeudi Araya, and so on.
> 
> Other dark-skinned American celebrities found a warm welcome and lots of admirers in Italy since the 1960s and 70s, and lived there for part of their lives, such as Lola Falana, Rocky Roberts, Edith Peters, and so on.
> 
> There is also a small number of Italian politicians of African descent, such as Magdi Allam, Jean-Léonard Touadi and Dacia Valent (who was also a Member of the European Parliament). After the recent parliamentary elections, two more have joined the group gaining election to the Chamber of Deputies: Cécile Kyenge Kashetu and Khalid Chaouki.
> 
> True, in Italian schools there is yet no "Black Italian day" and no emphasis on "diversity", but episodes of race-based bullyism are not condoned either. If the teachers refuse to be pro-active about it, the principal should be notified. There is always the chance that some principals would be wary of "making waves" and upsetting the _statu quo_.
> 
> Besides that, some Milanese can't help being contemptuous of Italians from southern regions. I had a Neapolitan friend who worked in Milan. His car had Naples license plates, and he parked it on the street. He found it vandalized repeatedly until he got it re-registered.



I said it happens everywhere....many years ago I worked in Trento. Guess what? Locals were considered terroni by people living in Alto-Adige 

There are many bigots EVERYWHERE...UK, Australia, you name it included.


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## Lonely

Black people maybe would feel better knowing that Italians and Greeks were racially abused in Australia for decades...and they were white.


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