# 13 year old daughter not looking forward to the move



## Jem0509 (Jan 3, 2014)

Hi all, i am new to the site but am learning loads which will help with our imminent relocqtion from the uk. My husband is starting work there next week and I am coming out for a month to try and find us somewhere to live. our 13 year old daughter is staying inthe uk until easter - hopefully i will have secured her a place in school. 

i amtrying to convinve her all will be great but don't really know what to convince her with as I have no idea what teenagers do there or where they go - How do they spend their time... Any advice would be great even from other parents who have overcome the reluctance of teens.


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## busybee2 (Aug 8, 2013)

dont worry this is a very transient place, and they do welcome new kids in no problem... which schs are you applying to? it is very very very difficult... have you talked to any of the schools? what would happen if you couldnt get a place, you will even struggle for next year as applications will have already been given out etc... the only good thing for you is that there is a rule here that kids in uae schs cannot switch schools past 15th feb so if a place becomes available after that date you can "jump" the q if from overseas.. but thats only if a place becomes available... so you need to apply to all relevant schs.. some require you to pay an admin fee etc.


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## Jem0509 (Jan 3, 2014)

Thanks for your comment -i have registered her at Gems and made enquiries at Brighton but felt until I actually got there I wasnt really taken too seriously. i am really understanding how hard it is going to be to get her in any where soon - but i will have to keep trying and be persistant I guess. she can stay in the uk for the time being but that is not great for us as a familyand I dont want her to get too used tothe situation. The sooner i can sort something the better. 

i am heading our there soon and want to get on with making our plans - looking for accomodation, trying to find a school, and generally getting a feel for my new home. my husband is working for Ethiad Rail and is based in Al Mirfa (a long way out I understand) but hopefully I can get around and get anfeel formthe place. i am really looking forward to the new adventure.


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## busybee2 (Aug 8, 2013)

right al mirfa is a long long way from ab dabs really. people will have kids over there but they arent really any international schools as such it would be the local ones. if you are looking at commuting from mirfa etc then you should look at off the island really as its a little closer. look at cambridge international and cambridge high school bisad in mbz and then you have the schs in kca and bcad etc. which gems as cambridge high sch and cambridge international are british and gems world academy is american. the 3 i would start off with would be the 2 cambridge ones and bisad. you dont have to be here to accept a place... it can all be done remotely but i would suspect they didnt take you seriously as they dont have places! places to live it would depend on your budget but look for a compound that way you can meet other kids etc.


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## twowheelsgood (Feb 21, 2013)

One of the chaps who joined my team brought 12 year old to Dubai. They were on holiday in Europe, and flew direct to Dubai arriving one evening and were in their new school the following day. They apparently love it and fitted straight in - especially the Arabic lessons 

They have been all over the Emirates already - the Sharjah Arabian Wildlife place, the beach, skiing, more beach etc. They love the bus to and from school with their mates and really don;t like Dad picking them up any more.

They even liked the border runs they had to do for a while, as they got to go to another hotel with a pool for the afternoon.


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## busybee2 (Aug 8, 2013)

dxb is very different for schools for a start there are many many more to choose from. i dont think they would have luved going to sch the next day.... considering sch starts very very early here after getting off a plane the night before.


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## Jem0509 (Jan 3, 2014)

Thank you for your replies. My husband will be doing the communting to mirfa from one of the compound areas. I think we will be looking at Al Reef type places - that is my job when i get there to have alook around and try and get afeel for location and community. I have read that trying to secure a villa/apartment is not easy either due to demand. We are looking for 3 bedrooms. For about 130k and near other teenage girls is an absolute must.


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## busybee2 (Aug 8, 2013)

130 is on the low side al reef has gone up in price... look at mbz or kcb or hyrda but it will depend on where you get a sch place.


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## arabianhorse (Nov 13, 2013)

kids will love it. my 16 year old was dead set against it. Came for a 3 week holiday, had a blaset and couldnt wait to return.
Started school a few months later. Had a blast till he finished schooling and went off to Uni. Still looks forward to returning for holidays with his old mates
It will be fine. Trust me:welcome:


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## travelinhobo (Sep 17, 2010)

Amazing how only one of the responses covered the most important point.

How can you convince anyone how a situation will be when you've never done it yourself at that age? I don't know how long you've lived in the UAE, but you don't move a 14 year old. Period. To do so is simply selfish. And to attempt to lie or deceive her into thinking something that nobody knows is true is even more disrespectful.


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## busybee2 (Aug 8, 2013)

travelinhobo said:


> Amazing how only one of the responses covered the most important point.
> 
> How can you convince anyone how a situation will be when you've never done it yourself at that age? I don't know how long you've lived in the UAE, but you don't move a 14 year old. Period. To do so is simply selfish. And to attempt to lie or deceive her into thinking something that nobody knows is true is even more disrespectful.


who are you directing this at?


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

Kids are all different, but its a "dodgy" age - hormones, teenage angst, friends, insecurities..... We moved to Spain (ok, not so far or as different but...) with my two teenagers, girl 11 and son 13 - my daughter hated the idea of Spain and never settled - she hated everything about it. My son didnt care before we moved, but loved it once we arrived. 

We're now back in the UK . (My daughter wasnt the only reason we returned) She never settled - part of me thinks she was just being defiant and belligerent the whole time! But its her life too???????? 

So, my advice would be - you either take her opinions into account as its her life too, or you ignore her thoughts as she is still a child, as a parent you know best and she will love it when she gets there. Besides, its your life too LOL!

In otherwords - good luck, I hope it all works out!

Jo xxx


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## CuriousChick (Jan 22, 2014)

Hmmm... my first post - and just a quick note to basically tell you that, in my opinion, its all about managing her expectations.

What I mean by that is the following: She is 'not excited' but she is also not dead set against the move. A mixture of "we have to move for Dad's job" and some positive re-enforcement of it being a new adventure will go a long way. Girls that age usually love to re-invent themselves and are in such a discovery phase that maybe the idea of finding new friends will do the trick.

I have a 13 year old girl that is looking forward to the move - but we've moved 3 times in her relatively short life already. She is still in touch with 'old' friends from other places via email and Skype and knows that geographical location is only part of the equation of friendships.

Good luck (if you read this) -


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