# Sex Education



## macdonner (Oct 24, 2010)

Doing the mum/woman random thinking thing, I wondered if anyone can tell me if there is any sex education in Spain and from what age it starts? My daughter is 7 and so hasn't had any as yet (and I'm quite content not to have that talk as yet, she believes babies come out of your belly button and that's fine by me for the moment lol). I don't want her to get a shock if sex education is taught at an early age in Spanish schools and so would sit her down before we move next year to give her some of the basics.

Thanks for any info.

P.S. feliz ano nuevo to you all!


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

macdonner said:


> Doing the mum/woman random thinking thing, I wondered if anyone can tell me if there is any sex education in Spain and from what age it starts? My daughter is 7 and so hasn't had any as yet (and I'm quite content not to have that talk as yet, she believes babies come out of your belly button and that's fine by me for the moment lol). I don't want her to get a shock if sex education is taught at an early age in Spanish schools and so would sit her down before we move next year to give her some of the basics.
> 
> Thanks for any info.
> 
> P.S. feliz ano nuevo to you all!


My daughters first sex education lesson was when she started ESO (secondary school). Bite the bullet and talk about it yourself beforehand - it makes life easier lol!!!!

Jo xxx


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## Guest (Dec 31, 2010)

I'm fairly sure that it starts in 2nd ESO, or when the kids are +/- 13. 

As for sitting her down before you move... take into account that "T&A" are much more widely shown on television and magazine covers than I was used to back home. I don't know how it is in the UK, but it's definitely a different attitude here. 

Please don't wait until she gets sex ed in school. 13 is too late for some kids... 

Feliz año to you too!


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## gerrit (Jul 15, 2008)

In Belgium there was no compulsory sex education when I was a school-going kid. Luckily our teacher found it important enough and assigned a project to some students to research and then present it all in front of the class. Hence we got sex education at age 10 for the first time. A good age IMO.

Unfortunately not every teacher was like that. I know of a girl who had her period the first time and had never heard about it. Ironically her 37 year old father also never heard of menstruation!

A good sex education is necessary. Taboo on sexuality (something very normal) is totally uncalled for, and if we see the number of teenage pregnancies it shows some schools (and parents) fail dramatically in sex education. I surely hope the Spanish schools do a better job in this, and that other than purely explaining how it all works, they hopefully also add that sex is very normal and nothing that has to be in a taboo atmosphere.


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## jimenato (Nov 21, 2009)

halydia said:


> I'm fairly sure that it starts in 2nd ESO, or when the kids are +/- 13.
> 
> As for sitting her down before you move... take into account that "T&A" are much more widely shown on television and magazine covers than I was used to back home. I don't know how it is in the UK, but it's definitely a different attitude here.
> 
> ...


Seeing as the age of consent in Spain is 13 I should think that 13 was a bit late to start teaching it.

BTW, We were given no sex education whatever at school.


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## Caz.I (Mar 21, 2009)

halydia said:


> I'm fairly sure that it starts in 2nd ESO, or when the kids are +/- 13.
> 
> As for sitting her down before you move... take into account that "T&A" are much more widely shown on television and magazine covers than I was used to back home. I don't know how it is in the UK, but it's definitely a different attitude here.
> 
> ...


For a minute there I was wondering what T&A were lol! Yes, the TV shows everything...and more...though usually after 1am. Mind you, what is worse IMO on daytime TV is the no-holds barred images on the news, dead bodies etc.

13 is too late... especially considering the age of consent is 13 here. I agree with Gerrit, 10 seems the right time to find out the facts. But I think it would be better talking to her yourself... though probably infinitely more embarrassing for her lol.


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## MaidenScotland (Jun 6, 2009)

I was taught that the best form of contraceptive at a party was to stand in a corner and say

I am a good girl... Can you guess what sort of school I went to?

I am surprised in this day and age that a 7 year old thinks you come out of your belly button as I would have thought that sex education is rightly or wrongly all around us now.

My son in law had an vasectomy yesterday and as my just turned 14 grandson is more or less fluent he phoned up to make the appointment. The following instructions were issued

tell your papa to shave the tiny hairs of his tiny balls and to wear slippery pants. lol
his 12 year old brother had put a photo of frozen peas on his dads facebook

My /SIL have always answered questions when asked but he could have died with embarrassed a few years ago when out walking with the boys on a towpath... they were asking their dad all about sex and Justin was trying to get the conversation over quickly as he could see someone approaching but of course just as they got within hearing distance Harry asked... will it not hurt my willie when it goes in? The man just looked in horror at my SIL who then said ohhh its ok they are my sons ... red faces all round.
Sex is all around us and it is easier to deal with at the time...


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## xabiaxica (Jun 23, 2009)

my 11 year old (in yr 6 primary) has definitely been having sex education at school for at least the last year - and I'm pretty sure than in C. Medi lessons they studied how the human reproduction system works in about year 4, if not before


at home, we have always just answered questions as when they were asked - there has never been the need for a 'talk'


my nearly 15 year old probably knows (in theory, thankfully) more than I did at 25


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## macdonner (Oct 24, 2010)

Thanks for all your replies - I'm quite shocked to learn that the age of consent in Spain is just 13!!!

I think she does probably know more than she lets on (as I did when I was that age if I can remember lol) but is scared she will be embarassed by asking and is quite happy to listen to what goes on in the playground rather than ask me (although she saw 2 guys kissing on a TV programme a few months ago and said to me they are lesbians - I didn't know whether to say shhhh or correct her lol).

I think it would be best to sit her down before we move and broach the subject - i'm in no way a prude and am very open-minded I just get embarrased VERY easily.


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## Guest (Dec 31, 2010)

macdonner said:


> I think it would be best to sit her down before we move and broach the subject - i'm in no way a prude and am very open-minded I just get embarrased VERY easily.


You're the momma, suck it up  
You can do it! :clap2:


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## Alcalaina (Aug 6, 2010)

halydia said:


> I'm fairly sure that it starts in 2nd ESO, or when the kids are +/- 13.


I believe it is now compulsory in state schools but not Catholic ones. Each autonomous community has its own syllabus - there was a big hoohah in the press about Extremadura a while ago ...

Spanish region takes hands-on approach to sex education | World news | guardian.co.uk

I went to a girls' grammar school in Kent the 1960s and the only sex education we had was about rabbits, taught by an elderly spinster in a biology class. I would love to see her face if she were to read this ...


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## macdonner (Oct 24, 2010)

halydia said:


> You're the momma, suck it up
> You can do it! :clap2:



Yeah, you don't think about things like that when you decide to have them do you lol. A quick swig of wine and then :boxing: show no mercy lol.


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## Guest (Dec 31, 2010)

Alcalaina said:


> I believe it is now compulsory in state schools but not Catholic ones. Each autonomous community has its own syllabus - there was a big hoohah in the press about Extremadura a while ago ...
> 
> Spanish region takes hands-on approach to sex education | World news | guardian.co.uk
> 
> I went to a girls' grammar school in Kent the 1960s and the only sex education we had was about rabbits, taught by an elderly spinster in a biology class. I would love to see her face if she were to read this ...


Unless I'm wrong, even the semi-private _concertado_ (they receive some state funds) Catholic schools must bring in a sex educator. 

As you said, this could vary depending on autonomous regions, but this is what it's like where I am.


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## Guest (Dec 31, 2010)

macdonner said:


> Yeah, you don't think about things like that when you decide to have them do you lol. A quick swig of wine and then :boxing: show no mercy lol.


Wine, whiskey, just make sure the munchkin doesn't see you with the booze


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## Sonrisa (Sep 2, 2010)

I don't know what it is like now, but sex education back in the 80's was given at 10years old, at least in my school.

I very well rember my sex education class. I was ten years old, attended an all girls only school run by nuns in Madrid (Jesus y Maria) , and at the time most of the teachers were nuns.

It was a whole week of sex education and everything was described with every detail and matter of factly, from conception to birth to every single part of the male and female anatomies...and wait for it- anticonception methods that were used at the time(pill, condon etc). We were even handed a preservative to see what it looked like...

All very useful. 

I remeber we weren't allowed to laugh or make jokes during the sex education lessons.


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## fourgotospain (May 4, 2009)

Have you thought about getting her a book? My daughter has 'The little Book of Growing Up' I think it's called, great for pre-teens as covers periods, boys, mood swings etc etc. We looked through it together and she now has it to browse herself too.


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## xabiaxica (Jun 23, 2009)

fourgotospain said:


> Have you thought about getting her a book? My daughter has 'The little Book of Growing Up' I think it's called, great for pre-teens as covers periods, boys, mood swings etc etc. We looked through it together and she now has it to browse herself too.


chicken!!

actually that's a great idea, though IMO it should be as a springboard for discussion as you seem to have used it, rather than a replacement



feliz año


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## fourgotospain (May 4, 2009)

y tu tambien 

I am a chicken  ! I think it helped her realise that feeling emotional and her body changes are completely normal - obviously your mum's opinion means nothing!! It's a cute little book and is very hot on building self esteem as well as the 'mechanics' which I like.


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

xabiachica said:


> chicken!!
> 
> actually that's a great idea, though IMO it should be as a springboard for discussion as you seem to have used it, rather than a replacement
> 
> ...


 Sex education and discussions have never been an issue in my house. Over the course of time, when the kids were little (no age minimum), stuff just cropped up and it was talked about. TV is a good springboard, the soaps in particular tend to prompt lots of questions. 

Yes, sometimes they or me may feel a bit embarrassed. At the moment my 13 yo finds talking about sex very awkward, but we just laugh and have a conversation without using certain words. My 15yo son, wont discuss any of it with me anymore, but thats how it should be. I know he knows what he needs to and he has his father, friends and my older daughters boyfriends if he needs any specific queries answered! 

Jo xxx


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## gerrit (Jul 15, 2008)

Sonrisa said:


> I remeber we weren't allowed to laugh or make jokes during the sex education lessons.


And did that work? 

I remember aged 10 we had sex education class in Belgium. The teacher appointed some students who had to research it all as a project and then present their project in front of class. It was all very well researched, they did a great job, but one moment it went wrong. The guy who had to explain what masturbation was couldn't stop laughing himself. Nobody in the audience was laughing, but the guy who had to present it couldn't control his laughing anymore, and in the end one of the other guys in the project had to take over his presentation.

The year after, aged 11, the same project was done again. This time the teacher wanted me to be part of the group researching and presenting the project. I however refused and did a project on Belgian castles and abbeys instead. I guess at age 11 my interests were still very innocent


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## MaidenScotland (Jun 6, 2009)

fourgotospain said:


> Have you thought about getting her a book? My daughter has 'The little Book of Growing Up' I think it's called, great for pre-teens as covers periods, boys, mood swings etc etc. We looked through it together and she now has it to browse herself too.




Years ago I presented my son with a book called Living with a willy and on the cover was a a cartoon drawing of a boy holding out the waist band of his trousers and fireworks exploding... I thought reading the book would prompt him... I asked him a few days later if he had read the book and he told me NO I throw it out


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## macdonner (Oct 24, 2010)

Never thought of a book, doh - she loves reading and so this might be the way to tackle it and to take my mind off being embarassed lol! Have had a look on Amazon and they have one called "Let's Talk About Where Babies Come From" by Robie H. Harris. Think I might give that one a go as it's had quite good reviews but will bear in mind the Little Book of Growing Up too!


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## Sonrisa (Sep 2, 2010)

gerrit said:


> And did that work?
> 
> Not really, no ten years old takes sexual education seriously, anyways. The last day was for Q&A's, some of the things that we asked were really funny and silly.
> 
> My point is that back in the late eigthies, sexual education took place at 10, and was very comprehensive for an all girls -nuns catholic school.


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## Sonrisa (Sep 2, 2010)

Incidentally, my brother went to an all boys - priests school and he had no sexual education whatsoever! Jajaja


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## jimenato (Nov 21, 2009)

Sonrisa said:


> Incidentally, my brother went to an all boys - priests school and he had no sexual education whatsoever! Jajaja


I think that was probably a good thing.


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## Sonrisa (Sep 2, 2010)

lol yes, much much better that way... 

Though you never know and nothing comes as a surprise these days, maybe we'll hear one day that some boys got "private lessons".


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