# 457 Visa - Relationship breakdown



## Carmella (May 22, 2013)

Hi

I have been a defacto on my partners 457 visa for a number of years. I have never settled in the area we live in, it is very quiet, conservative and not the painted picture of the Australian life my friends & family are probably picturing me living in. On the opposite end, My partner thrives in his job and loves the quietness here. He point blank refuses to leave or acknowledge that im miserable. He has his mind set on one thing and thats owning a house in a quiet area and not have to mingle with other people. I am quite social and make friends easily but this place we're living in is quite clicky. Ive given it almost four years and while some people are nice, theyre simple not 'us'. The sense of humour is not the same and people are quite reserved. For the record im am more that willing try another part of Australia or even Canada/US. His company has started the process of applying for our permanent residency and I have just found out that once PR has been granted, you will never agin see a cent of the Suoerannuation if you decide to permanatlet leve the country. This came as a blow to me and im in sheer panic mode. I understand the concept of superannuation and that a permanent residency should mean 'permanent', but this is completely unfair. As 457 visa holder we have alreadly been vunreable to the various minfields and holes in the visa which abuse the rights of a holder. Having the knowledge that there would be at leats dome compensation if you leave the country in a few years always gave me some light at the end of teh tunnel. My country is in a bad state at the moemnt so going back permenately on my own is not an option. My parets are not alive and and would dread the though tof imposing myself on a friend for accommodation. 

In summary, ive been homesick for 4 years, involved in an unequal relationship with no say in things, moving to another part of Oz is not an option as my partner wont budge, and If i dont cancel this PR application, i will have no super to take back with me. I was thinking about going home and getting a 1yr visa to come back and earn some more money for a year(or maybe 2 eif extended). I have friends in Perth who could maybe put me up but il thinking the smarter option might be to go to an isolated town where th pay is higher and I would have to be here more than a yera or two. Plus I woulde still be able to claim super when I leave

Please help, trust me Ive tried all avenues and never wanted out this relationship


----------



## espresso (Nov 2, 2012)

Hi Carmella, 

sorry to hear about your personal struggles. It can be quite stressful for a relationship when one person is happy and content with the living arrangements and the partner is not. Four years is probably a long enough time to know your mind, so I won't urge you to "give it some more time". Regarding your questions: 

Once you have PR you are treated in the same way as Australians living in Australia (for tax purposes). Among other things you cannot access your super until you retire or fulfill any of the other conditions for release. I'd suggest to go through the list but unless you face severe financial hardship you will probably not be eligible. Note that *temporary residents* can't cash out the super for free but will be *taxed 35% *on withdrawal. But on the other hand the PR won't be tied to your husband's. You are free to come and go as you please (for five years at least ). 

If you plan to get a divorce you should probably *talk to your husband* as soon as possible. My guess is that he does not realize how seriously you contemplate leaving and may yet change his mind about moving to another town. In addition, since you are sponsored as secondary 457 visa holder (and PR applicant) based on your ongoing relationship, so *legally you should notify DIAC* once your relationship breaks down... and consequently leave the country. 

Now, some couples stay together "formally" as a family until the get PR and then split, to ensure that both partners (and the kids) can stay. If the split is amicable and nobody starts a new relationship during that period this may work - but I suppose it must be extremely stressful. Australian PR is usually coveted, so your willingness to throw that away just because you won't get your super - which, after four years, cannot be all that much if you factor in the costs to relocate to another country and apply for a new visa - gives me a certain sense of urgency. I'd strongly suggest to check how much super you would be due right now to see if it's really worth it. 

The question is: What do you *want* to do? I understand that you want some autonomy and the freedom to move somewhere else. *Do you have savings and skills* to apply for a skilled visa in your own right and to cover the start-up costs (visa fee and costs for medicals/translations/PPC, bond and rent for new flat, savings that will get you through a couple of months of job search etc.)? Do you want to salvage your relationship? I would base my next steps on the answers to these questions and not on a "side-problem" like whether you can access your super or not. 

All the best, 
Monika


----------



## Carmella (May 22, 2013)

Thank you Monika

Yes I was aware of the 35% tax on super withdrawal. I've been aware of this for around 2 years so I have always calculated the amount in my head after tax and also in euro conversion. I have built up quite a decent sum over 4 years, not enough to never have to work but enough to get me on my feet back home and maybe a deposit on my home. The property market in my home country has meant house prices have been slashed by a 3rd...

I guess the reason I'm panicking about the PR is more so to do with extreme homesickness thats never gone away in 4 years. The relationship also hasn't been exactly excellent and he has treated me badly on several occasions. I think he may be bipolar although this have never been diagnosed. He has an no ability to feel compassion or understand people's pain when he is being rude so I think he shows good signs of narcissism. Sorry if this sounds like I'm changing the thread into a relationship counselling, I'm just trying to get my point across about how this more bout me not feeling personally safe and secure in relationship than trying to wrangle money out of the government. At the end of the day, I love him and would be devastated if the relationship ended, wanting children is also something that is tearing me apart. But if I stay and in 5 years time he is still refusing to leave this town I will resent him and regret ruining the last couple years of my 20s by feeling miserable and lonely. He is very stubborn and has told me to 'F off home' when i broached the subject before. whether he regreted saying that is a different story but he's not an easy person to read and can be heartless at times. Its a huge risk to take if I decide to stay

I get your point about being treated as a OZ citizen and abiding by the rules once you get PR. But by the same token, you pay taxes as an OZ citizen when your on a 457 visa and don't get anything back in return? Your treated as a foreigner and left in limbo with no Medicare and no voting rights. Also when you leave permanately and never end up returning, the government get to keep your Super, even the amounts that came from your wages into a fund every week for 4 years, where is the justice in that? Surely if your declaring you're never going to work here again, then that should be sufficient. There are so many unjust outcomes and horrible loopholes to the migration system here. I only hope the same horrible things thats happened in Europe doesn't happen to Australia one day. It will be a horrible twist when Australia's future generation are almost forced to leave the country they love because of the horrible actions of their government. Aus has also been good to me in alot of ways and will never have gained the work experience back home that I have here, however these stories from people on 457 are becoming scarily common.


----------



## espresso (Nov 2, 2012)

Hi Carmella, 

I agree that being on a *457* visa makes you *more vulnerable than PR holders or citizens*. But you cannot have your cake and eat it too. There are some tax benefits for 457 visa holders, such as the foreign income exemption, the possibility to access your super early and LAFHA (until last September). I know a couple of people who made a tidy profit by working in Australia on a 457 for a couple of years and returning to their home country afterwards. But I've heard some horror stories about people who got harassed and pressured by their employers as well and some cases where people had to leave after living in Australia for many years because they could not get PR. 

If you take up PR/citizenship you *trade the above benefits for another set*, such as access to MediCare, access to certain government jobs and the possibility to buy property without lengthy proceedings etc. Our home countries aren't quick to hand out privileges to "visitors" (and that's what you are on a 457 visa) either. I think that's fair! But don't get me started on refugee and humanitarian visa applicants, here or in Europe. Now *those* people are treated really badly... 

If you want my *honest advice*: Talk to you partner, get PR and go back home for a year afterwards if you really can't make it work. That will give you a 5-year time window to return, independent of your partner. Money is not that important as long as you can afford rent and living expenses. Your relationship and your personal happiness should be your primary concerns at the moment!

All the best, 
Monika


----------



## findraj (Sep 24, 2012)

espresso said:


> Hi Carmella,
> 
> Money is not that important as long as you can afford rent and living expenses. Your relationship and your personal happiness should be your primary concerns at the moment!
> 
> ...


I agree on this. Sort the relationship issues first and then look at money. If you eventually break up, look at options you have back home because you will have to leave the country. 

Well, what you could do is wait till you get a PR and then search jobs in Australia and get on your own feet and move to bigger cities like Melbourne, Sydney. Sure you can start a new life where you are not socially alienated from meeting people and being friends with them.

Australia has more to offer you than the small city that doesnt suit you.

And if the homesickness still doesnt go, go bck to your own country, atleast you would have made decent money by then and hopefully market conditions get better there......

Also, dont think having children will resolve your issues. Thats a disaster some women do...He will treat your kids also the way he treats you...


----------



## Guest (May 23, 2013)

The government do not get to keep your super. You are just not nialliwed to withdraw it early or transfer it out if the country. You will get it when you get to retirement wherever you are in the world. The Australian government did this because in the past people on PR would withdraw it, spend it, then turn up in retirement needing centerlink means tested pensions. So because you will have the right to go back in retirement your super stays where it is for niw but its still yours.


----------

