# Donation/Gratuity Costs



## M.C.A. (Feb 24, 2013)

I'm only speaking for my area but man... it's starting to get bad in our region for handouts and now the Front Liners there's no money for their lunches and drinks unless donated, I am starting to dread going out to the market area for vegetables (I have the meats in my freezer) or needed products at the grocery stores.

It used to be every now and then the Front Liners would get my attention by a loud greeting but now it's every time I go out and they lack drinks, I just can't give it up every day, they never say they need drinks but I feel it's implied.

Riding my bike to the market or grocery now is a little agonizing because someone on the way or coming back will ask for money and now an increase of indigent and mentally challenged individuals at our gate and this same group will also hang out at the markets religiously plus the walkers staring seamlessly because the light is on but nobody is home, and yet they seem know about money, people who wait while you get change with hand out and those violent cursing rag-slappers.


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## greenstreak1946 (May 28, 2017)

I know what you mean M.C. A. There is a limit to how much a person can give out to the needy. I put up a lot of Xmas lights at my apartment when I was living in Tagum city against my partner's wishes not to do it. Wow! That was a mistake. I had the whole neighborhood pounding on the gates to my apartment wanting money since they saw all the decorations. They found out right away it was a foreigner living there. I did buy candy and gave it out to children, but most said they wanted money in stead. 

Art


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## Cebu Citizen (Dec 13, 2013)

The really sad part about this is that many of these so called needy people are *NOT* really needy!

We were out walking through the market on one particular day and were approached by a small group of "homeless street children" begging for money...my wife started to give these children some coins and I stopped her because I saw what she had missed...

*ALL* of the children were freshly bathed and clean, *ALL* of the children were wearing nice clean laundered clothing, *ALL* of the children had well groomed and trimmed hair, *ALL* of the children had FULL belly's and were clearly NOT hungry or starving, and *TWO* of the children had mobile phones!!!

The ANSWER to this riddle: freshly bathed + freshly groomed + well dressed + well fed + mobile phones = NOT NEEDY!!!*...SCAMMERS...*

And typically these children take all of the money home to their parents from their perpetually scammed daily event so the parents can buy beer and cigarettes and sing Karaoke all day long while the children are out begging for money from foreigners!

I told my wife to watch the children and observe...they do not ask Filipinos for any money because they know they will not get any...they typically only target foreigners, who typically always feel sorry for them and willing give these beggars money!

On this same day, I noticed an older woman who kept watching us while we were shopping for items in the market. I saw this old woman on several occasions purchasing her items with large bills. Then all of a sudden as we were about to pay for our items and leave the market, the lady placed her bags of food in the corner and covered them with a bamboo mat and then came over to us and was begging for money as if she was starving and needed food. Again, my wife started to give her some money and I stopped her and asked the old woman whose bags of food those were and she denied that the bags of food were hers, (playing ignorant and innocent)...but when I tried to give the bags to the security guard and tell him that someone lost their items and I wanted to turn them in, the old woman grabbed all her bags and left and the crowd applauded my actions for stopping the scammer...

She was just waiting and watching for us to get our change from our purchases so she could approach us and beg for the change...AND you cannot say you don't have any money because these scammers WAIT until you have money in your hands before they strike!

AND sadly...the Front Liners are NO different. Some of them might actually need some assistance but many of them will use and are using this COVID19 Pandemic situation to better their own personal financial situation because they know they are in the spotlight and they know everyone is feeling sorry for them right now because of the harsh working conditions...

Several front liners here in Bohol have been caught begging for money and then pocketing it for their own personal gain...AND several people who ARE NOT front liners are dressing up like front liners and begging for money!!!

The Provincial Governors Office issued a warning to the public in an attempt to try and stop these scams; to NOT give any money to the front liners because the Provincial Government has met ALL of their needs during this pandemic...

YES, there are certainly a lot of needy people in this World and YES we should all do our part to try and assist these people whenever possible, BUT PLEASE be cautious and stay alert and be aware of the entire situation before you go around handing out your hard earned money to scammers who are only trying to separate your money from your pocket...

*BE SAFE OUT THERE EVERYONE...and BE CAUTIOUS!!!*


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## M.C.A. (Feb 24, 2013)

I've been in the market area's and asked for money from women that seem to be nicely dressed and one actually had a business there and she had the hand out like I was a tourist, heck I've been here for 10 years and using the same markets, I had to tell this same women 3 times to her face no... I can't help you before she stopped bugging me. 

I wasn't aware that the Front Liners have everything they need.


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## Manitoba (Jun 25, 2014)

Pre-covid days on my walk through Makati I would pass a guy with no legs in a wheelchair who always had his hand out. I often gave the change in my pocket or 20 or 50 p.

Until one day I walked past him. Not many people on the street and he was behind a tree so he did not see me approach. When I walked around the tree he had a stack of bills in his hands, must have been 50 mm thick, mostly blue ones. He was counting them. Best guess was he had around 100,000 p.

As soon as he heard me approach, the cash disappeared and he had his hand out. I simply looked at where his other hand was down at his side, bills still showing and smiled as I shook my head no. He had a sheepish grin on his face.

Next time he saw me he turned to another expat coming the other way, who gave him some change.


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## M.C.A. (Feb 24, 2013)

greenstreak1946 said:


> I know what you mean M.C. A. There is a limit to how much a person can give out to the needy. I put up a lot of Xmas lights at my apartment when I was living in Tagum city against my partner's wishes not to do it. Wow! That was a mistake. I had the whole neighborhood pounding on the gates to my apartment wanting money since they saw all the decorations. They found out right away it was a foreigner living there. I did buy candy and gave it out to children, but most said they wanted money in stead.
> 
> Art


Art, it's always about the money, they could care less about fancy foods or drinks when it all comes down to it they want cash, same with workers, no reason to spoil them they still want full payment.


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## bobby1947 (Apr 15, 2020)

Here in Bayog my wife rarely " allows " me to go to the local market ! Simply because the Foriegner price kicks in ! My wife is a small built woman but she does not not take any nonsense from anyone !
When i do go to the market it makes me smile how she negotiates prices ! As for the beggars i have seen them walking along our road and there are many at the main Calamba crossing and also in SM Calambas car park but as my wife tells me it is in fact illegal to give money to beggars ! So i dont anymore ! As for the frontliners in my area there arent any even the tent and table has gone from outside the Barangay hall ! And since March we have only been stopped and turned around once !
Last Friday we went to S&R in Nuvali saw three checkpoints but the frontliners were just sitting at the tables ! And as its getting near to xmas there will be many more beggars coming down from the mountains etc. We have a CCTV system with 4 cameras one looking at the main gate and if anyone we dont know rings the doorbell we dont go to the gate !


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## M.C.A. (Feb 24, 2013)

bobby1947 said:


> And as its getting near to xmas there will be many more beggars coming down from the mountains etc. We have a CCTV system with 4 cameras one looking at the main gate and if anyone we dont know rings the doorbell we dont go to the gate !


For sure we are bugged normally early in the morning as if they have an emergency and it turns out they're selling fish or cucumbers or something else... it seems no matter how we try to lock up the home they just keep pushing.

On a lighter note, a guy that sells us the mini Buko (coconut) pies came by and for sure I answered that call... fresh cakes and pies sure beats the packaged stuff in the stores. 

I haven't' seen the mountain people in a long time, they used come here when the weekly one day market would come here on Mondays and if caught in the market with these women and their children it's a real pain to get away as a foreigner, that's when you get the constant tapping on your arm or when paying they have their hand waiting for your change, they sometimes would try to get the change.

The worst experience I ever had or one that really angered me was when I was carrying my 2 year old grandson in the main market area Sta Cruz Laguna and two guys each with a letter were tapping on each of my shoulders as I was walking.


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## greenstreak1946 (May 28, 2017)

I know there are a lot of people that are just scammers, but so many are really in need. I feel sorry for the young children at holidays like Christmas. I know a lot of them haven't received anything for Xmas. The problem is we can't give to all of them. I found out if we start giving the word gets out and all the children come running for a handout. So, it gets out of hand. I was giving out treats for Halloween and wow that was a mistake. Again I had the whole area with children pounding on my place.

My partner lady which was a Filipino said to not put up decorations or give out things because this is what happens when you do. So, I am not suppose to celebrate Christmas with decorations that I like to do for the ruckus it causes. 

art


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## M.C.A. (Feb 24, 2013)

greenstreak1946 said:


> I know there are a lot of people that are just scammers, but so many are really in need. I feel sorry for the young children at holidays like Christmas. I know a lot of them haven't received anything for Xmas. The problem is we can't give to all of them. I found out if we start giving the word gets out and all the children come running for a handout. So, it gets out of hand. I was giving out treats for Halloween and wow that was a mistake. Again I had the whole area with children pounding on my place.
> 
> My partner lady which was a Filipino said to not put up decorations or give out things because this is what happens when you do. So, I am not suppose to celebrate Christmas with decorations that I like to do for the ruckus it causes.
> 
> art


Celebrate Art, we do and at first it was that way but it doesn't mean you have to give to everyone. I frequently give to the In-law kids, they are very little and when their parents are low on money I do what I can to give to their kids, some of the parents ended up in prison and for a while I did my best to help the kids any way I could, for sure I don't feel sorry for the parents.

We have our Christmas Tree up and some lights. Next month we'll get more lights if available, last month there was no Christmas lights for sale but maybe now and if not I'll order online.

I just ordered two 2.5 kilo packages of Gummie Bears... Impossible to find in our region for some reason but before they were available, and they should get here tomorrow or Saturday, I'll share with the toddlers.


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## cvgtpc1 (Jul 28, 2012)

And sometimes I wonder if its more cruel to give them something momentarily for them to experience what its like and then not have it the next day to know to miss it. If that makes sense.


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## greenstreak1946 (May 28, 2017)

Hey cvgtpc1----you might be right about a temporarily giving and then they don't have it later. they have to go back to their way of life. 

art


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## Lunkan (Aug 28, 2020)

greenstreak1946 said:


> Hey cvgtpc1----you might be right about a temporarily giving and then they don't have it later. they have to go back to their way of life.


 I'm against just giving (except special events as Xmias and to poor people who can't work)
but *for Help-to-self-help projects*. I have done some such during the years and one of the internnational such aid organisations said they want me to call them when I get to the Philippines. Perhaps I will work some for free leading some projects in the Philippines for them, which they finance.


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## Cebu Citizen (Dec 13, 2013)

greenstreak1946 said:


> I found out if we start giving the word gets out and all the children come running for a handout. So, it gets out of hand. I was giving out treats for Halloween and wow that was a mistake. Again I had the whole area with children pounding on my place.
> 
> art



I made a *HUGE* mistake one time but I still enjoyed the overall situation and I also learned my lesson...I was going to visit a friend in Manila and their local Fiesta was ongoing at the time and I stopped and watched a young girl, (maybe two years old), dancing to some music...it was very cute...and while I was watching, a lady next to me started talking to me and I learned that she was the area Barangay Captain.

No one asked me for any money or donation and no one even hinted at anything financial or monetary in nature...everyone was just laughing and smiling at this little girl dancing away like it was the only thing in the World happening at the time and as I was really enjoying the festive atmosphere and I was feeling very generous, I *volunteered* to buy the small children some ice cream. The Barangay Captain seemed surprised and happy at my suggestion. As far as I could see, there were maybe 10 or 12 children there and right across the street was a 7-Eleven store...so I went in and I bought a bunch of ice cream bars...came out and distributed them to the little children...

But before I realized it, the group of little children grew and grew and continued to grow! I am not sure how the word got out so fast but it seemed that every child in all of Manila was heading there and I needed to figure out something very quickly!

At first I chocked it up to being my fault...there was absolutely no one to blame but myself. I had opened this can of worms...now I needed to deal with it. So I went back into the 7-Eleven and I cleaned out the entire ice cream freezer and bought everything they had, (just the individual serving sized ice cream bars), and came back out and gave ALL the ice cream directly to the Barangay Captain and while she was distributing the ice cream to the children, I hastily made my escape before I realized that this too was NOT going to be enough to feed the growing army of children coming towards the area...

But I learned a very valuable lesson, (at a cost of nearly 3,000 pesos)...no mater how much you want to help anyone with anything...they always seem to want more! So, I have learned to pick and choose very carefully who I contribute to and how much I contribute!

Just a friendly word of cautionary advice: the absolute fastest form of communication known to mankind is a group of Filipino Children getting something from a foreigner that starts with the letter "C"...whether it is *C*andy, or ice *C*ream, or *C*oins...

*BE SAFE OUT THERE EVERYONE!!!*


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## fmartin_gila (May 15, 2011)

Over & over I have made this statement "THE GIVER HAS TO SET THE LIMITS AS THE TAKER NEVER WILL".

Fred


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## cvgtpc1 (Jul 28, 2012)

Cebu Citizen said:


> I made a *HUGE* mistake one time but I still enjoyed the overall situation and I also learned my lesson...I was going to visit a friend in Manila and their local Fiesta was ongoing at the time and I stopped and watched a young girl, (maybe two years old), dancing to some music...it was very cute...and while I was watching, a lady next to me started talking to me and I learned that she was the area Barangay Captain.
> 
> No one asked me for any money or donation and no one even hinted at anything financial or monetary in nature...everyone was just laughing and smiling at this little girl dancing away like it was the only thing in the World happening at the time and as I was really enjoying the festive atmosphere and I was feeling very generous, I *volunteered* to buy the small children some ice cream. The Barangay Captain seemed surprised and happy at my suggestion. As far as I could see, there were maybe 10 or 12 children there and right across the street was a 7-Eleven store...so I went in and I bought a bunch of ice cream bars...came out and distributed them to the little children...
> 
> ...


Kind of the same story...

Cousin in law and I went on a bar run in Manila mid-80s. Same thing happened, party grew by one or two guys with each bar we went to. 

Got up to 10 or 12 guys and I put all my money in my shoe and turned out my pockets saying I'm broke. They scraped enough together to pay the tab and that was it. The looks on their faces was priceless lol.


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## M.C.A. (Feb 24, 2013)

I went to the Pharmacy to get some medication for my granddaughter she has psoriasis yesterday and I was #2 in line but some lady shows up and stands in front of me even though they have the standing points marked and so that's nothing new but another lady shows up with one eye and she goes straight to the window where another guy was buying his products and in Tagalog he tells her he doesn't want to die of Covid so she backs off and now I'm #3 in line dang...

Anyway while waiting an indigent asks me for money and give coins and for sure he hasn't showered in weeks and then some other lady was talking to me but I didn't' understand her, she looked like she was waiting in another line with no face mask, I finally make it to the counter order my stuff and then this lady approaches me from the side with hand out and I mentioned to her what are you doing and where's your mask and she says I have no mask, the Pharmacists tells me she has mental health issues.... and that's when I say, but there's so many like this and the Pharmacists said I know.

On the way home I got Hey Joe'd to death by the street walkers begging for money.

Went to the market today a little earlier this time and nobody bugged me. My 5 kilos of gummie bears arrived yesterday also, wow they're good, it's been a long time, grand kids sure like them to.


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## greenstreak1946 (May 28, 2017)

hey M.C.A.

I thought you bought them gummie bears to give out on Halloween???? hahahhahahaha

art


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## BusyBC57 (Apr 13, 2015)

M.C.A. said:


> I'm only speaking for my area but man... it's starting to get bad in our region for handouts and now the Front Liners there's no money for their lunches and drinks unless donated, I am starting to dread going out to the market area for vegetables (I have the meats in my freezer) or needed products at the grocery stores.
> 
> It used to be every now and then the Front Liners would get my attention by a loud greeting but now it's every time I go out and they lack drinks, I just can't give it up every day, they never say they need drinks but I feel it's implied.
> 
> Riding my bike to the market or grocery now is a little agonizing because someone on the way or coming back will ask for money and now an increase of indigent and mentally challenged individuals at our gate and this same group will also hang out at the markets religiously plus the walkers staring seamlessly because the light is on but nobody is home and yet they seem know about money, people who wait while you get change with hand out and those violent cursing rag-slappers.


I'm glad my wife is the one that goes to the market for this very reason.


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## M.C.A. (Feb 24, 2013)

BusyBC57 said:


> I'm glad my wife is the one that goes to the market for this very reason.


You are fortunate. My wife likes to go to the market but it's about 2 miles from us, zero parking available and she can't ride a bike so the costs of transportation would add up but I might start having my son do the shopping next he's 15 years old and tall for his age.

Some good news though, we've been notified in our region that the public transportation and the bus will open back up again on the 1st of October.


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## Manitoba (Jun 25, 2014)

I am lucky where I am staying, not a lot of houses in the immediate vicinity and to walk to the dive areas or even into town, I do not go past a lot of populated areas. My place is at the end of a dead end road so no traffic going past either.

So far only minimal numbers of people with their hands out. However as the economic impact of no tourists around increases, I expect that to change .


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## Cebu Citizen (Dec 13, 2013)

Manitoba said:


> I am lucky where I am staying, not a lot of houses in the immediate vicinity and to walk to the dive areas or even into town, I do not go past a lot of populated areas. My place is at the end of a dead end road so no traffic going past either.
> 
> So far only minimal numbers of people with their hands out. However as the economic impact of no tourists around increases, I expect that to change .




I was extremely fortunate where we built our home on a half hectare of land my father-in-law left to his daughter, (my wife), before he died, (5,237.88 square meters of paradise)...it is also on a deadend road very close to the National Highway and not too many houses or people around...very good area...easy access...peaceful and private and serene and tranquil and quiet and not too far from town and the market...UNTIL:

The Mayor owned a large piece of property, right at the very end of the road...about a half kilometer past our home...and he built a huge, colossal, gigantic, mega-sized Cock Fighting Arena!!! The place has not opened yet as construction is not finished because of COVID19...everything has halted...BUT I expect that will change eventually!

When this place does open (whenever the pandemic is over and gambling is allowed and construction begins again), I would imagine a *HUGE* increase in traffic and people and everything else that follows these kinds of places...

So my wife and I are taking advantage of his current construction delay and initiated a new construction project of our own...installing a very necessary and massive, reinforce concrete perimeter wall around our entire property and home. We also met with the Mayor and talked to him face-to-face about his project and he assured us that he will not tolerate that kind of behavior in his facility as he too is building a future home on our road as well and will have a full time security force on site at the arena and claims the arena will operate only two days per week...BUT...we will see what the future brings! Our peaceful quiet days might be numbered...???

NO MATTER HOW WELL YOU RESEACH and PLAN...THINGS CAN and WILL CHANGE and all we can do is go with the flow and prepare the best we can...BE CAREFUL OUT THERE EVERYONE...


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## M.C.A. (Feb 24, 2013)

Cebu Citizen said:


> I was extremely fortunate where we built our home on a half hectare of land my father-in-law left to his daughter, (my wife), before he died, (5,237.88 square meters of paradise)...it is also on a deadend road very close to the National Highway and not too many houses or people around...very good area...easy access...peaceful and private and serene and tranquil and quiet and not too far from town and the market...UNTIL:
> 
> The Mayor owned a large piece of property, right at the very end of the road...about a half kilometer past our home...and he built a huge, colossal, gigantic, mega-sized Cock Fighting Arena!!! The place has not opened yet as construction is not finished because of COVID19...everything has halted...BUT I expect that will change eventually!
> 
> ...


For sure you'll need that perimeter wall and might I add gates to every door entry, the Mayor can only serve a maximum of 9 years and then a new administration.


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## Lunkan (Aug 28, 2020)

Cebu Citizen said:


> NO MATTER HOW WELL YOU RESEACH and PLAN...THINGS CAN and WILL CHANGE and all we can do is go with the flow and prepare the best we can...BE CAREFUL OUT THERE EVERYONE...


 That's why I aim at geting at least 3 rural hectares with the short end towards the public road so I can get 250 away from the public road at own land. Undeveloped land around so can get that too later. 
But it's expensive to build good roads and the house I want huhu so first step in plan is to build a simpler house close to the entrance to first live in self and later leave to an employee for the business.
If I can get the sorounding lands too, no one can develop close.


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## Cebu Citizen (Dec 13, 2013)

M.C.A. said:


> For sure you'll need that perimeter wall and might I add gates to every door entry, the Mayor can only serve a maximum of 9 years and then a new administration.




YES!!! For sure...solid structured gates at every entry point...and a very minimal number of entry points...

There might be the occasional nice cock fighting arena, so I will not label them all as bad...but every time I read stories in the Bohol Chronical News Paper or the Manila Times, they ALWAYS talk about drugs and shootings and crap like that...so we are preparing for the worst, if and when the construction is completed and this place might open...and if it is not so bad, then all the better...but if a lot of undesirables are always passing by...we will be prepared for it.

12 different commercial grade HD CCTV cameras with normal, night vision and infrared modes and linked to our mobile phones; motion detector and photo cell lighting on every column post, (cameras and lighting are high grade impact resistant in case someone tries to disable them with a rock or something); crash resistant automatic hydraulically operated gate at the front perimeter wall entrance with finger print scanner for my wife and I for quick easy access both in and out of the front gate also accessible from our mobile phones; intercom system for when invited guests arrive; a more decorative wall on the road frontage but the sides and back walls will be 10 feet tall with 12 inch thick high impact resistant reinforced concrete with concertina razor wire at the top so that no one in their right mind would even attempt to try and climb over the wall...plus outside of two sides of the walls are regularly maintained, (wet and muddy), irrigated rice fields that make access extremely difficult from those two sides of our property!

Outside, it might look like a top secret military installation but inside...it will still be our little piece of paradise...our thought was to make it so intimidating from the outside appearances that no one would want to even try to get inside...and if they did try, they would end up a bloody mess because there is no passing through this razor wire and then there is nothing there for them anyway...it's just a residential home...

We already had a safe room built under our home 2 years ago with its own independent electric and water source and enough food to last several weeks and absolutely NO access once it is locked from the inside. It includes an emergency communication system so we can call the Police or someone else if needed in the case our home might be breeched.

Plus the added advantage that MOST of our neighbors on this dead end road are all very closely related family members, (including the Mayor who is building his home across from ours and who owns the cock fighting arena), and everyone is typically good at watching each others backs...

And...I cannot be robbed anyway because I just spent all my money on the security upgrades...Hahaha!!!

We just want to be left alone to enjoy our lives in peace! No matter what is going on outside...on the inside is a half hectare of our own little paradise...peace and quiet, landscaped gardens, a swimming pool, etc.

We thought about doing this security wall before, right after the little uprising in Marawi City in Mindanao two years ago and then this Cock Fighting Arena being built close by and now the Corona Virus...it was enough for me to pull the trigger for the ongoing construction project!

If we want to go out...we can...but if the world stays crazy...we will be just fine right here!

STAY SAFE EVERYONE...


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## Gary D (Oct 28, 2013)

With all that security you may as well write I'm very rich please rob me along the front wall. As soon as a filipino sees big walls and security they think you have things to hide Your biggest problem will be the noise of hundreds of tricycles going up and down the road. Our local cockpit also has a Roosters as and added attraction.


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## Manitoba (Jun 25, 2014)

Gary D said:


> ....... Our local cockpit also has a Roosters as and added attraction.


I am hoping that the guy next door runs out of money and has to eat or sell his rosters.

Last night was the worst, a cat in hear got them crowing, non stop noise from about 1 am to 4.


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## Lunkan (Aug 28, 2020)

Gary D said:


> With all that security you may as well write I'm very rich please rob me along the front wall. As soon as a filipino sees big walls and security they think you have things to hide Your biggest problem will be the noise of hundreds of tricycles going up and down the road. Our local cockpit also has a Roosters as and added attraction.


Walls also HIDE from people passing when thieves are braking in...

My plan is kind of the opposite 
By having biger rural land there will be space to closest to the public road plant a tree type which make people can't see in, so the only they will see are these trees and the road connection. I suppouse I will be a common looking gravel road to look nothing special. 
Then make a TURN of the own road so from the public road no building is seen.
The house closest to the public road will be just a small unpainted hollow block house similar to what poor Filipinos live in when they are one step up from sheds made by scrap.

The later biger house will be *unpainted* at outside too if anyone get that far at the backside of the property. Perhaps I will have builders from elsewhere to do that so the locals haven't seen there is a biger house there.

When I go to town it wil be in a CHEAP car as a Toyota "owner jeep" or Suzuki Minivan. 
Or perhaps even in a farm vehicle as a three wheel motorbike common used by farmers for crop transports. I have made drafts allready how to make a combo where a comfortable seat can be easy put in and out INSIDE a topdown cargo transport sidewagon. Perhaps with roof from a scraped sidecar or rebuild a sidecar to suit cargo transports. I will need such vehicle for small cargo transport internal at the land for the business anyway. There are cheap electric ones, which *neither need registration, year control or drivers licence*. But they are weak and can have to short distance capacity if living far from town.
And *me dressed as a poor farmer*  

I hope wife will agree when I argue it's of security reason. Although I like to dress relaxed like that anyway so left to see if she will protest :heh:


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## M.C.A. (Feb 24, 2013)

Lunkan said:


> The later biger house will be *unpainted* at outside too if anyone get that far at the backside of the property. Perhaps I will have builders from elsewhere to do that so the locals haven't seen there is a biger house there.
> 
> When I go to town it wil be in a CHEAP car as a Toyota "owner jeep" or Suzuki Minivan.
> Or perhaps even in a farm vehicle as a three wheel motorbike common used by farmers for crop transports. I have made drafts allready how to make a combo where a comfortable seat can be easy put in and out INSIDE a topdown cargo transport sidewagon. Perhaps with roof from a scraped sidecar or rebuild a sidecar to suit cargo transports. I will need such vehicle for small cargo transport internal at the land for the business anyway. There are cheap electric ones, which *neither need registration, year control or drivers licence*. But they are weak and can have to short distance capacity if living far from town.
> ...


Unpainted in the front is actually a good idea and I was seriously thinking about an Owner Jeepney but they were going to phase those out this year, but Covid got in the way and so I don't know the status of the Jeepny but it doesn't look promising, so if you want to go the 3 wheel route they do sell Rickshaws or Tuk Tuks, 3 wheeled units made by Baja RE, TVS King or Piaggio Ape, brand new they run from 165,000 - 218,000 pesos, can you handle the extreme heat and humidity though?

As a foreigner... all bets off on looking and dressing poorly, they'll first take a look at your shoes and even if you're wearing the local attire they'll be asking for pesos. 

When I make my monthly visit to the bank the grocery store, people are dressed very well, most will be wearing pants and not shorts, decently groomed it's so very important here, the works , we need to look good for our ladies, for sure the wife won't be happy about us looking shoddy.


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## Cebu Citizen (Dec 13, 2013)

I agree...I have dressed in shabby sweaty work clothes when making a quick trip to the hardware store while in the middle of a project and I have dressed casually to go to a restaurant or something like that and I have dressed really nice when going to a wedding at the church or a formal event for the family or municipality and it makes absolutely NO difference what you are wearing...the street people will still have their hands out asking for a donation!

I can be dressed in work clothes standing right beside a rich Filipino in nice clothes and the beggar will come to me asking for a handout and not even look twice at the rich Filipino...which just goes to show that it is just a scam perpetuated against foreigners! They think we have had a better and easier life and have more money and they know most of us will feel sorry for them and start handing out freebies. A perfect example are really young children...they are not born thinking that foreigners have more money than the local population...someone is TEACHING them this!

I mean really...think about it...how does a three or four year old child know that a foreigner has any money???

And the worse for me is at Christmas time!!! We can be out having a bite to eat and the children will come by attempting to sing a Christmas carol in exchange for a handout...and actually, I would love to give them a few coins IF THEY ACTUALLY SANG A SONG!!! But instead they put NO heart or effort into their task and they just stand there looking depressed and sad and halfway say the words NOT sounding like a song at all...If they would actually put some effort into it and really sing the song the best that they can and actually look happy about it with a real smile on their face and spread some Christmas cheer...I would give them all some coins!

Ahhhh...my rant for the day...I feel better now...Hehehe!!!


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## greenstreak1946 (May 28, 2017)

hey cebu citizen,

I have been coming to the Philippines for over 16 years now. I also lived there for awhile. What I came to realize is a lot of Filipino people don't appreciate the help the foreigners gives them. They expect us to do it. I don't understand where they were taught that the foreigner is suppose to help them all the time. They have the thinking that we are rich and should give out money when they ask for it. 

I had a friend there that kept giving money to his wife's family. they would just keep bugging him for it and if he didn't give the money to them his wife would get mad. Finally, he was broke and had no money left. Now he has financial problems.

Art


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## M.C.A. (Feb 24, 2013)

greenstreak1946 said:


> hey cebu citizen,
> 
> I have been coming to the Philippines for over 16 years now. I also lived there for awhile. What I came to realize is a lot of Filipino people don't appreciate the help the foreigners gives them. They expect us to do it. I don't understand where they were taught that the foreigner is suppose to help them all the time. They have the thinking that we are rich and should give out money when they ask for it.
> 
> ...


If you don't have enough money to give it becomes a problem and what I never understood was that once you become a part of the family "wife" they do expect you to pitch in your wealth because they all help each other out this way so there won't be any understanding of why you can't give them money or help them with business.

This goes for the neighbors, when you have a party with food and they're drinking near by they also want food, they won't tell you directly but they'll come over and be friendly but it all comes down to they want some food.


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## Manitoba (Jun 25, 2014)

Philippine culture is that the family always pitches in so everyone always has roughly equal parts.

As a rich foreigner (I know redundant terms) with no family in the Philippines, you are expected to donate your entire wealth to the family so you all live equally. Of course since you are not blood family, once you give all you are disposable and not entitled to share in any remaining family funds.

I have not taken a local partner yet but if I do it will be clear that she will get an allowance for all family obligations. ( Not huge but dependable, in the 5 to 10 k p range) I will recommend that she open a separate bank account for it an any "loans" that are repaid will increase that amount. That way I can deflect all requests for funds, and she can shame family members into repaying the loans so that the amounts are available for other family members. (Not sure it will work but worth a try.)

Part of my partner selection criteria is that she be as opposed to free loading family as I am, that she can and will try to impose some limits on the amount of family support. 

That and the two island rule will apply.


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## M.C.A. (Feb 24, 2013)

Cebu Citizen said:


> AND sadly...the Front Liners are NO different. Some of them might actually need some assistance but many of them will use and are using this COVID19 Pandemic situation to better their own personal financial situation because they know they are in the spotlight and they know everyone is feeling sorry for them right now because of the harsh working conditions...
> 
> Several front liners here in Bohol have been caught begging for money and then pocketing it for their own personal gain...AND several people who ARE NOT front liners are dressing up like front liners and begging for money!!!
> 
> ...


It was very hot today and I had to pay my bills using either Gcash or Cebuana L Hullier and I did notice that the Front Liners on the roads were getting delivered food and water by a trike, the trike was full of food items and water.


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## cvgtpc1 (Jul 28, 2012)

M.C.A. said:


> If you don't have enough money to give it becomes a problem and what I never understood was that once you become a part of the family "wife" they do expect you to pitch in your wealth because they all help each other out this way so there won't be any understanding of why you can't give them money or help them with business.
> 
> This goes for the neighbors, when you have a party with food and they're drinking near by they also want food, they won't tell you directly but they'll come over and be friendly but it all comes down to they want some food.


And the mindset is you have to give 100s of dollars when giving them 500P still puts some of them way ahead. So would you rather I send $25 or nothing....

I read somewhere where an expat said he gives no more than other family members. If he hears somebody gave 1000P, that's all he gives. But never heard of a filipino family member giving others money besides their parents.


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## Lunkan (Aug 28, 2020)

Origin culture is the one with money pay for the others,
and it's normal family and close friends do.
BUT it's odd it's expected by foreigners to pay for people we AREN'T close friends with, while same AREN'T expected by rich Filipinos... 

Some expats don't know the LAW say family HAVE TO support (closest) family WHEN IT'S NEEDED,
BUT a common "missunderstaning" (?) among Filipinos they believe they can expect support even if they don't do their best to solve their own problem, but that's wrong according to the law too. Except when they have reached retired age, then their chilren are expected to support them, which include us when being married to a Filipina.
The law is unclear though up to which level such support have to be if the richer have more than "existence minimum" living standard himself.

Although undepening of what the law say, it isn't sure Filipina wife think same  or get grumpy or "force" her foreign husband to support more than he can afford...

(I plan to make agreement with wife BEFORE marriage concetrning this, she get a total amount monthly for her own "pocket money", then she can support family from that amount she want herself  No more from me. And live far from in-laws to seldom get costs by being with them more than when I visit THEM. 
EXCEPT it become hard concerning what*extra * to agree to when it become *serious* illness problems among closest family to wife. Such can realy ruin families...
E g before covid in one family with much rural land so it was hard to find buyer to so they were short of cash. A sister got brain tumor, got high hospital bills an family realy tried to solve it by borrowing. The sister died anyway and family ended up with big depts. I have forgot amount but over a million left at depts.
Recently an other family poor but with some land triied to sell big part to try to save grandfather with cancer. They found buyer but "lucky" for the family the grandfather died fast so the hospital bill didn't become big before he died, but they have no money so they have to sell anyway. But the selling have become complicated by the grandfather stood as owner and now it's inheritance with many people involved needing to approve the selling. They agree, but complicated with signings by they live spread out.)


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## M.C.A. (Feb 24, 2013)

cvgtpc1 said:


> And the mindset is you have to give 100s of dollars when giving them 500P still puts some of them way ahead. So would you rather I send $25 or nothing....
> 
> I read somewhere where an expat said he gives no more than other family members. If he hears somebody gave 1000P, that's all he gives. But never heard of a filipino family member giving others money besides their parents.


If I could help one of my In-laws with 500 pesos I'd do it for sure and I have done this many times and at greater amounts and only to find out that we were just wasting our time and money. Heck they get around better than we do and hit the resorts they have so many friends and connections.

The family members that have spouses working abroad will cough up money for the family even though most of them could be working and some do work while others just hang out and live off the free ride, most of my In-laws also getting "Purpose" also known as Social Welfare and yet daily drinking, habitual smoking and of course gambling.

I have heard from other expats that they do have a cooperating hard working family but that's just not mine, it's all on me and so I avoid them as much as possible, they have their own money and assistance they don't need mine, I have my own family to worry about and now grand kids.


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## bigpearl (Jan 24, 2016)

Hear you Mark and members, we give mum and dad 35/36K PHP annually, depends on exchange rate but that is what Ben was doing when I met him, all good it's a thousand bucks a year and they appreciate and are no problem, 5 years ago we gave 40 odd K PHP to Bens sister so his niece could get braces for her teeth,,,,, money well spent as she looked like a piranha when she smiled, perfect now. 2 years ago Ben said his sister needed 10K for his nieces placement/accomodations etc. (nurse) She asked to borrow and pay back when they had the money,,,,,, nada and Ben has reminded her that it was a loan, 2 months ago his brother in law rolls up on a new motorbike showing off, Ben already gave them his motorbike for free when we moved back to Australia and not seen old bike for some time,,,,,,,, trade in?
Regardless no loans now and the rest of the family can blame his sister. We also contributed to his uncles funeral costs recently, only 3,000 pesos but they had no money,,,,,,,,, 3 or 4 weeks after the funeral there was a new fence going up on their front boundary,,,,,,,,, Now I simply say no. Ben doesn't bother to ask anymore.
Donation is the correct word here, don't donate. Bitter? No wiser. OMO.

Cheers, Steve.


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## Manitoba (Jun 25, 2014)

Part of the confusion stems from the fact that the Tagalog word for "give" sounds exactly like the English word for "loan".

So when they ask for a loan, it is not an English sentence but a Taglish one where they use the Tagalog word for give and English for the rest, It just sounds like "Will you loan me some money?"


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## Lunkan (Aug 28, 2020)

(I don't remember if I have told this.)

One expat told he had lend some money to a relative to his wife. No pay back.
When other family members ask for a loan, he just say:
-Sure I will lend you when /he/ have paid back..

That's his best "investment" ever :heh:


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## Cebu Citizen (Dec 13, 2013)

Lunkan said:


> (I don't remember if I have told this.)
> 
> One expat told he had lend some money to a relative to his wife. No pay back.
> When other family members ask for a loan, he just say:
> ...




I actually had this exact same situation happen with a Family member and it worked out great in the long run!

I lent a large sum of money to a close Family member here in Bohol to start a restaurant business in Panglao, (they already had a somewhat successful restaurant in Cebu), and the entire Family was there at a gathering when this situation happened. So I had lots and lots of witnesses...

After three years this person still refuses to repay the loan! When asked to help other Family members with money, I simply tell them that we have "X" amount of money available for loans...as long as this other person does not repay me, there is no more money available!

On top of this being the BEST investment I could have possibly made, with regards to having no issues lending money to anyone else in the Family...now, the entire Family is doing my dirty work and harassing this other person about repaying the loan so they can borrow some money from me! For me it works out either way..."IF" this person never repays the loan...I don't have to lend any more money to anyone and they know it and have stopped asking for money because they know why...and "IF" this person does repay the loan amount, I will gladly set that amount aside and use it to lend to other Family members as the need arises!

So, if any of you are having difficulties with friends or family members always asking you for money...sit down and work out a budget and set aside a certain amount of money for loans...then lend this amount in front of witnesses with appropriate documentation and that's it...you are done forever and ever into the future!

If they do pay you back, the amount goes back into the coffer for the next loan to the next person and if they rip you off and do not pay you back...then that is your legitimate excuse why there is no available funds to lend anyone else! Everyone is aware of the rules right up front and everyone knows the outcome if the money is not repaid and everyone will stop asking you for money...

I did this and in the first few weeks people would still ask for money and my wife and I told them this scenario outlined above and now...after several years of peace and quiet regarding loans or money...no one ever asks us for money ever...and when their are family gatherings...everyone blames the person withholding the loan payments for the unavailability of loans from us! We don't ever have to ask them to please repay our loan...the family is doing it for us and I think it is finally working...because this person has recently asked if they can start paying small amounts because they are tired of the massive harassment from *ALL* the family members.

Our response is: it does not matter to us if you repay us or not...its up to you! Pay us back what you owe us or face the wrath of the family...your choice...

Problem solved...one less thing to worry about! And if you choose to "give" any money to other family members as a gift, in private, that is your choice but you will no longer be obligated to always loan money to everyone who asks you!


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## greenstreak1946 (May 28, 2017)

My brother-in-law to be ask if I wanted to go to Davao city to see the movie about the planet of the robots. I said okay we could go. they were driving his older sisters car with his girlfriend. My financee and I rode the bus from Tagum city to Davao city later that day. We got to the mall and in front of the movie theater him and his girlfriend was standing next to the wall. I ask my fiancee why they were not over here with us in line. She said I was suppose to pay for them to get into the movie house. I said why am I paying for them when he ask me if I wanted to go? What a crock of *****. I have never experience a culture like this before. 

I guess they were taught to take advantage of foreigners. They were never taught to have manners.

Art


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## Lunkan (Aug 28, 2020)

greenstreak1946 said:


> I guess they were taught to take advantage of foreigners.


 As I wrote somewhere the origin culture is the one, who has money. pay.
Although it seem to have "developed" concerning foreigners :heh:

BUT far from all Filipinos are like that. 
I know rather many poor Filipinos, who have *never* asked me for money. 

Filipinos are world champions in tsismis (=gossip) many Filipinos say so themselves. Earlier many asked me for money, but I have made the bad ones loose interest in me by I don't give them money. Now few ask me so perhaps I have got assistance by tsismis :heh:


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