# does immigration split families up???



## m field (Jan 27, 2010)

Hi we are in the middle of filing for P.R for Kelowna B.C. and obviously because it is such a huge decision we are waying up the pro's and con's all of the time. Our children are 8,5 and 2 years old. A few people who we have spoken to in the U.K who have once moved to Australia and then returned to the U.K - 2 different families. Have told my husband that they totally regret moving as it has split there family up. They both have 3 children and now there kids - aged 30+ are scattered around Australia and the U.S.A. and they are back in the U.K. They believe it made there children more independent and totally regret the move asa they hardly see there kids and grandkids..

I know we have a long time to worry about our kids flying the nest but i just wondered what views people had or experiences they could give?????

Maria


----------



## Auld Yin (Mar 10, 2009)

m field said:


> Hi we are in the middle of filing for P.R for Kelowna B.C. and obviously because it is such a huge decision we are waying up the pro's and con's all of the time. Our children are 8,5 and 2 years old. A few people who we have spoken to in the U.K who have once moved to Australia and then returned to the U.K - 2 different families. Have told my husband that they totally regret moving as it has split there family up. They both have 3 children and now there kids - aged 30+ are scattered around Australia and the U.S.A. and they are back in the U.K. They believe it made there children more independent and totally regret the move asa they hardly see there kids and grandkids..
> 
> I know we have a long time to worry about our kids flying the nest but i just wondered what views people had or experiences they could give?????
> 
> Maria


Hi Maria,

You're not going to be well pleased with my comments but how intelligent are these few people your husband spoke to? They regret that moving caused their children to bee more independent? Surely as parents one of our main obligations is to make our children independent of us. Believe it or not we are not going to be around for ever. Your comments suggest that they "abandoned" their children and grandchildren to return to the UK. What did they expect their 30+ children to do? We all live in a global village. There is absolutely no guarantee that if you stay in UK that your two children are not going to get jobs overseas and settle overseas, and leave you. One misspoken word between you and your child could result in a rift that may never be repaired.
We are all the architects of our own fortune or misfortune in many things we do and you're correct insofar as your kids are two young for you to be worrying about such matters.


----------



## m field (Jan 27, 2010)

Thanks for that Auld Yin. No i to agree that its not a bad thing at all making your kids independent after all thats exactly what we want to do, and as much as our parents don't want us to go mainly because of there grandchildren they are both happy that we have the get up and go to do it. And who knows what may happen 15-20 years down the line thanks Maria


----------



## etril (May 26, 2010)

Hi Maria,

I'll just offer my two cents as the grown child of former expats.

Yes, if your kids spend a significant portion of their childhoods in Canada, they are likely to want to live there when they're older. Yes, if you move back to the UK, you may see them less often than if they lived right next door.

However, if all that happens (you're right - that's a long time in the future), it doesn't mean that your family is splitting up. As long as you maintain a strong emotional bond, there are plenty of ways to keep in touch, and when you do get time together it won't be taken for granted. 

You're giving your kids a great chance to become members of a global community. Hopefully they'll grow up and make you proud wherever they land. So don't worry, that sort of situation can work out well too. I chat with my mother regularly, and we're as close as we've ever been - even though we're 2000 miles apart.

Cheers,
E


----------

