# Savoir-Faire to Spare



## gino (Jul 20, 2009)

Saturday was a day of adventures and frustrations.

I’ve been bouncing between two jobs this week, which not only exhausts my body and mind, but also my opportunities to run errands. So I stumbled into the weekend with a full list of things that had to be done. Unfortunately, the red shirts and the government are locked in a rather bizarre contest to demonstrate who can close the most streets. I was stuck in a traffic jam for the better part of an hour on Friday because the army had parked a couple of trucks on a freeway, restricting traffic to two lanes. Saturday the government went all-in, shutting down not only many streets, but also the commuter sky-train. If busses were running on the streets that remained open, I didn’t see them. 

Undaunted, I decided to catch a taxi to a nearby shopping mall, but several drivers refused to take me. So I tried to catch a tuk-tuk, but they didn’t want to brave the road closures either. Finally I flagged down a motorcyclist who agreed to take me for an inflated fare. 

The motorcyclists are often a wild, fearless, adventurous, slightly crazy group. But perhaps my perception has been distorted because I only flag down a motorcycle when train and bus service are unavailable and my fare has already been declined by the taxi and tuk-tuk drivers. In truth, some of these cyclists proved surprisingly conservative, declining my fare because of difficulties navigating around road closures and police checkpoints or because of reports of snipers in my area – but that wasn’t until later in the day. 

Cyclists for hire, designated by their orange vests, are at the bottom of Thailand’s hierarchy of chauffeurs, behind the train conductors, bus drivers, van drivers, taxi drivers and tuk-tuk drivers. They are like flies swarming around the putrefying corpse of congested urban traffic, darting in and out, seeking some advantage, then amassing at the head of the queue in such numbers as to obliterate any sight of the cars behind them. 

This cyclist proved to possess an adventurous spirit as he gleefully darted past both police and red shirt blockades, at times screaming down the road in the opposite traffic lanes. This did not simply entail crossing a double yellow line painted on the road, but crossing a concrete barrier studded by huge support columns for an overhead railway on a ten-lane thoroughfare. But on this day there was barely enough traffic to justify a two-lane dirt road, so it wasn’t nearly as suicidal as it might have been during rush hour on an ordinary day. 

Arriving at the shopping mall, we discovered it was closed. This is no mean feat. In the States, a large shopping mall might have a couple of hundred shops. In Thailand, a single mall might have a familiar array of large department stores, boutiques and restaurants, but also a huge number of tiny stalls wedged together. When open, this mall probably provides retail space for well over a thousand merchants. 

I suggested we turn around and return home, but my driver was having none of that. After consulting with several drivers who were lounging on the steps for no apparent reason, as nobody was coming out of the shuttered mall, we set off again. 

After a couple of dead-ends, we arrived at the back entrance of a mall that was open. Most of the building was occupied by a single department store that sold everything from produce to bicycles. Of the half-dozen errands on my mental list, I was able to accomplish only one. But I took some time to look at a bicycle. It was fitted with standard 26” wheels, but the frame seemed much smaller than my bike in the States. I would have had to adjust the seat to six or eight inches higher above the frame than my bike at home, which would mean leaning over more and a less comfortable ride. But I did buy a Blu-ray disc player, since I’ve noticed many of the bootleggers are now offering high-definition copies. 

I then stopped at a pharmacy to buy some soap. I noticed a fairly hot looking girl looking over the health and beauty products, but her back was to me. After making my purchase, I detoured to exit along the H&B aisle. As I approached, she straightened to allow me to pass and I could see that whatever she was buying in the H&B line was working for her. I smiled and somehow managed to knock over a can of soda. I probably hit it with the Blu-ray player carton. Anyway, it split open and managed to spray soda onto my eyeglasses from the floor. People actually put this stuff into their stomachs! Fortunately, there are so many pretty girls in Thailand, you can crash and burn twenty times a day and not exhaust your opportunities. 

Catching a ride back proved somewhat more challenging, but I found a tuk-tuk driver who agreed to take me for an inflated fare of ฿100. But then he pulled over and studied a slip of paper with my destination’s address and decided he wanted ฿200. 

After dropping off my purchases and washing the soda off my face and glasses, I decided to venture out again. This time, as occasionally happens, my efforts to hail a ride resulted in a committee meeting in which half a dozen drivers confer amongst themselves to determine if it’s possible to get to where I want to go and which one should take the fare. 

Three rides later I returned, having accomplished no more of the items on my must-do list for the day. But the road leading from the major thoroughfare to my soi was barricaded. I got out, paid the driver and started walking home when I was stopped by one of the three-dozen soldiers casually hanging around the steps to a closed mall at the intersection. They told me I couldn’t go home because there was a sniper with a machine gun on the street. 

The soldiers didn’t seem to be doing much of anything about the sniper, beyond advising pedestrians to avoid the street. They were locked and loaded with assault rifles, shotguns, automatic pistols and some sort of oversized shotgun which may have been loaded with less-than-lethal rounds. But they were sitting around doing something next to nothing … until a shot was fired. The soldiers sprang into action and waved the gathered pedestrians and on-lookers away, then continued doing something next to nothing. 

So I returned to my old neighborhood and had some sushi and a strawberry milkshake at a restaurant on Nana that employs the cutest waitress I’ve met in Thailand, then shot a few games of pool. 

Getting a ride back to a neighborhood with a sniper was the greatest challenge of the day. I haven’t been rejected that many times since my first high school dance. But I finally found a tuk-tuk driver who agreed to get me close to my destination for another inflated fare. He turned me over to a truly adventurous cyclist who wasn’t allowing anything to stop him and managed to bring me right to my door, but only after two armed soldiers spent an inordinate amount of time scowling at a slip of paper printed with my apartment’s address. 

Last night I could hear gunfire. I briefly considered sleeping in the bathtub, but they don’t make tubs out of iron, like they used to. I considered watching a movie, but my new Blu-ray player didn’t come with an HDMI cable. It didn’t even come with an RCA cable. It used to be that everything came with RCA cables. I rarely used them, but never discarded them. I probably have twenty RCA cables at home in the States, but didn’t bring any of them. 

This morning the usually vibrant streets that surround my quiet soi are nearly deserted. Even the 7-11 convenience marts are shuttered. About half the small shops on the next soi are open, but the larger shops are all closed. 

In addition to the five unfinished tasks on my list from yesterday, I need to find an HDMI cable.


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## Guest (May 16, 2010)

Are you sure it's wise to be gallivanting about on the back of motorcycles, to get your shopping done? Frankly rather than head out to buy some soap, I might resort to what the Thais sometimes call the_ farang shower_ ... a squirt of anti-perspirant/deodorant.

Sounds like you are a bit too close to the conflict areas for comfort at the moment. Keep your head down. Great post, keep them coming.

What's your sense of the level of danger? Outside the blockaded areas, are Thais going about their normal business, with a smile?

I'm sure you've heard, but the authorities are supposed to be imposing a curfew tonight. It is in restricted areas of the city, but it might be unwise to be out on the streets nonetheless.


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## gino (Jul 20, 2009)

*Realistic Options*

The motorcycles are often the only option for transport. They manage to get into places that taxis and even tuk-tuks can’t access due to barricades, checkpoints and traffic jams. 

I don’t feel in any imminent danger and I think the same can be said of most Thais. I don’t believe the red shirts, yellow shirts, multi-colored shirts, military or police have any reason to target me and the same goes for ordinary Thai citizens. 

That being said, I can hear gunfire as I write this and it doesn’t sound as if it’s particularly distant. There is some danger of injury from a stray bullet, but the risk is remote. Bullets have a maximum range of possibly a mile, but handguns are really only effective at about a hundred yards and rifles at possibly twice that distance. Bullets slow down as they travel and drop due to gravity. The risks of injury from a bullet fired from more than a block or so away are fairly remote. 

Also, four journalists have been injured by gunfire, one fatally, which seems a large number in relation to the total fatalities and injuries. It’s possible that some within the conflict are deliberately targeting journalists for whatever reason. It’s also possible they are trying to avoid injury to journalists, but they are lousy shots. Either way, it’s probably not a good idea to carry really big cameras to the front lines. 

I am feeling a bit stir crazy, but there aren’t many places to go and there aren’t many ways to get there. The Thais seem to be going about their lives as best they can, but it’s difficult to go about one’s business when shops, trains, banks, streets and such are closed. 

My digs are in the area subject to curfew, so there’s not much chance of avoidance. I’m wondering if the trains and buses will be running tomorrow. If not the taxi drivers will be having a field day.


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## Guest (May 16, 2010)

You sure picked a good time to head for Bangkok, couldn't have timed it better. That said things could get worse - let's hope not, it's seems to be anarchy in certain areas already, with reports of innocent civilians even being targeted by snipers on their balconies.

Trains and buses tomorrow? Well the government has announced a public holiday for Monday and Tuesday, so who knows. Though they announced a curfew earlier, than cancelled it. They really don't know what they're doing, it seems. The PR from the current violence, with journalists and civilians being shot at (and hit), and an increasingly desperate CRES today claiming it's all down to terrorists dressed up as police and army, is terrible.

They just look like a bunch of incompetent idiots. Is Abhisit trying to save face by refusing the latest UDD suggestion of talks/ceasefire? I had a lot of time for him before, but the new grim-faced hard-liner approach is worrying - this could end in really major bloodshed.


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