# Americans in Spain...how do you deal with the distance from 'home'?



## tobyo (Jul 16, 2011)

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Our retirement is 10 years away (we hope!! just met w/our financial advisor who thinks we'll earn what we've lost but it may take several years....sure hope he's right! or we won't be going anywhere.......but I digress!) but I am doing the research now. never too early I think 

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What I'm wondering is if there are any forums like these where American expats post?? reason I ask has to do with how to deal with the great distance between Spain and "home". I read so many of the UK posters here mentioning how close UK is to Spain and so I wonder if there is a flip side to that and if there are posters out there somewhere who write about stuff we Americans deal with, the distance thing being but one of those things. I'll try to google again but thought someone here might know.


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## xabiaxica (Jun 23, 2009)

tobyo said:


> I've really enjoyed this thread. although I've pretty much made up my mind to retire to Spain, it's nice to hear other perspectives of my some day adopted country to retire to. Your reasons to go to Spain sound excellent to me but I'd agree you don't want to make the decision w/o having visited. Our retirement is 10 years away (we hope!! just met w/our financial advisor who thinks we'll earn what we've lost but it may take several years....sure hope he's right! or we won't be going anywhere.......but I digress!) but I am doing the research now. never too early I think
> 
> I hate to ask a question in the middle of someone else's thread but I also don't want to start another one with just this question. so hopefully someone will see it and reply. What I'm wondering is if there are any forums like these where American expats post?? reason I ask has to do with how to deal with the great distance between Spain and "home". I read so many of the UK posters here mentioning how close UK is to Spain and so I wonder if there is a flip side to that and if there are posters out there somewhere who write about stuff we Americans deal with, the distance thing being but one of those things. I'll try to google again but thought someone here might know.


we do have a few Americans on here, though admittedly not as many as there are Brits - possibly due to the difficulty of getting Visas to live here, rather than the distance

2 immediately spring to mind - halydia who lives in Spain & has recently married a Spanish guy, & our moderator in France, BevdeForges

there are some Americans living in Italy & Greece who post too

I've edited your post a bit & given it its own thread


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## Bfpijuan (Apr 6, 2011)

I am an American married to a Spaniard. Currently living in Villarrobledo, moving to Valencia soon. I don't have a problem with the distance. I go to the States a couple of times a year to see family. I keep in touch via computer and phone.


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## Guest (Oct 3, 2011)

Hello!

Nope, there's not many choices of forums for Americans in Spain. Get used to posting with the Brits! They're accepting folks, I promise - or at least, they've been nice to me! <3 

I'm just starting out so trips back home are limited to what's in the piggy bank. We try to make one trip back - either at Christmas or in August (we're both teachers). I have an unlimited North American calling plan with skype which works great to call landlines back home for cheap. 

I don't really have a problem with the distance. I was living "further away" when I lived in Canada because you could only drive, there was no easy flight option. 

There's plenty of Americans in Spain. Every now and then I come across a blog of a person who lives here (not just studies, or is on a year long contract). However, not many of them seem to post in these forums.


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## Alcalaina (Aug 6, 2010)

If you retire permanently to Spain you will happier if you regard Spain as your home. In my experience, people who talk about "going home for Christmas" etc never really settle here in Spain.

If there is any danger of you becoming homesick for the US, think very carefully whether a permanent move is the right thing.


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## tobyo (Jul 16, 2011)

xabiachica said:


> we do have a few Americans on here, though admittedly not as many as there are Brits - possibly due to the difficulty of getting Visas to live here, rather than the distance
> 
> 2 immediately spring to mind - halydia who lives in Spain & has recently married a Spanish guy, & our moderator in France, BevdeForges
> 
> ...


I noticed  thanks for the info.


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## tobyo (Jul 16, 2011)

Bfpijuan said:


> I am an American married to a Spaniard. Currently living in Villarrobledo, moving to Valencia soon. I don't have a problem with the distance. I go to the States a couple of times a year to see family. I keep in touch via computer and phone.


that's great but I am not sure we will have the funds to make trips like that. Once a year might even be pushing it! but good for you that you're able to do that.


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## tobyo (Jul 16, 2011)

halydia said:


> Hello!
> 
> Nope, there's not many choices of forums for Americans in Spain. Get used to posting with the Brits! They're accepting folks, I promise - or at least, they've been nice to me! <3
> 
> ...


oh I have no problem with the Brits  Truly. I don't necessarily need to be in touch with Americans in Spain once we're there, just would be nice to read other things having to do with moving from the US to Spain. you know, like maybe which company to use to ship half (okay, maybe 1/3, 1/4?) of our stuff when we do finally move? and that kind of thing. but thanks for your reply! and I'll most likely stick around here these next 10 years while I gather information, if that's okay


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## tobyo (Jul 16, 2011)

Alcalaina said:


> If you retire permanently to Spain you will happier if you regard Spain as your home. In my experience, people who talk about "going home for Christmas" etc never really settle here in Spain.
> 
> If there is any danger of you becoming homesick for the US, think very carefully whether a permanent move is the right thing.


oh I don't know that it's so much being homesick than missing my daughter. by the time we leave the US she'll just be out of college and (hopefully) starting a life on her own? that's "my" plan anyway  A ver lo que pasa eh? 

I've already got a skype account and I suspect that by the time we leave skype (and others probably) will be ubiquitous. 

I already had my year of being homesick when I lived in Madrid as a student 30+ years ago. I got a real good taste of it then. my first time away from home and I choose a foreign country thousands of miles away, heh. when I do things, I do them big  hubby? now that might be another story. he NEVER talks about it. that is to say, he never brings it up. He'll talk about it when I bring it up.


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## Alcalaina (Aug 6, 2010)

tobyo said:


> oh I don't know that it's so much being homesick than missing my daughter. by the time we leave the US she'll just be out of college and (hopefully) starting a life on her own? that's "my" plan anyway  A ver lo que pasa eh?
> 
> I've already got a skype account and I suspect that by the time we leave skype (and others probably) will be ubiquitous.
> 
> .


Missing their family is one of the biggest reasons why people regret retiring abroad. We've had a number of people go back to live in the UK from our village, because their grandchildren were growing up without them. And they were visiting them two or three times a year!

Skype is a great invention, everybody uses it here so no worries in that respect.

Buena suerte!


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## Guest (Oct 3, 2011)

tobyo said:


> oh I have no problem with the Brits  Truly. *I don't necessarily need to be in touch with Americans in Spain once we're there, just would be nice to read other things having to do with moving from the US to Spain. *you know, like maybe which company to use to ship half (okay, maybe 1/3, 1/4?) of our stuff when we do finally move? and that kind of thing. but thanks for your reply! and I'll most likely stick around here these next 10 years while I gather information, if that's okay


I totally understand. It's nice to have a support network on Thanksgiving! Gosh, even in Canada I got homesick then. 

Stick around - it's always nice to have someone from home! Where are you from, if you don't mind me asking? I'm originally from NH.


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## tobyo (Jul 16, 2011)

halydia said:


> I totally understand. It's nice to have a support network on Thanksgiving! Gosh, even in Canada I got homesick then.
> 
> Stick around - it's always nice to have someone from home! Where are you from, if you don't mind me asking? I'm originally from NH.


oooooo!!!! I cannot wait to have Thanksgiving in Spain!! I did of course as a student in 1980 and it was at the home of our director. I hardly remember it tho.

don't mind at all. and it's complicated  born in Illinois, moved to L.A. area when I was 9, grew up there....moved around alot in my 20s  eventually married in CA and dragged hubby, kicking and screaming, to the midwest. back to his home state of Minnesota. it's gonna be a long 10 years of winters while I plan our "escape". he he. I'm reading a pretty good book right now: "The grown-up's guide to running away from home." so far I really like it! lots of good advice.

and thanks, I think I will stick around. you guys are all so nice


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## tobyo (Jul 16, 2011)

Alcalaina said:


> Missing their family is one of the biggest reasons why people regret retiring abroad. We've had a number of people go back to live in the UK from our village, because their grandchildren were growing up without them. And they were visiting them two or three times a year!
> 
> Skype is a great invention, everybody uses it here so no worries in that respect.
> 
> Buena suerte!


yea....grandkids....hopefully my kid will take after me and have her kids later in life and by then I might move back. I am thinking of leaving it open-ended, at least at this point. Meaning, move to Spain but after so many years and possible ailing health, we might move back. We'll be in our 60s by then, hubby closer to 70 so it's more him that I worry about than me. but I guess anything can happen. we shall see! and who knows? maybe she'll be so rich by then she'll be able to visit US many times. a girl can dream can't she? 

thanks!


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## CompBio (Sep 28, 2011)

tobyo said:


> oh I have no problem with the Brits  Truly. I don't necessarily need to be in touch with Americans in Spain once we're there, just would be nice to read other things having to do with moving from the US to Spain. you know, like maybe which company to use to ship half (okay, maybe 1/3, 1/4?) of our stuff when we do finally move? and that kind of thing. but thanks for your reply! and I'll most likely stick around here these next 10 years while I gather information, if that's okay


I hope you don't mind me jumping in, but that's a big question for us, too -- how much of our stuff to keep? 1/2, 1/3, 1/4, 1/10? Fortunately we're not too attached to things, so paring down won't be difficult. I expect our living quarters will be smaller as the best research opportunities are in major cities like Madrid or Barcelona where rent is probably not cheap.


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## tobyo (Jul 16, 2011)

CompBio said:


> I hope you don't mind me jumping in, but that's a big question for us, too -- how much of our stuff to keep? 1/2, 1/3, 1/4, 1/10? Fortunately we're not too attached to things, so paring down won't be difficult. I expect our living quarters will be smaller as the best research opportunities are in major cities like Madrid or Barcelona where rent is probably not cheap.


nope, don't mind a bit. for me, I guess it depends on what happens. my idea now might not be what actually happens. bearing that in mind...

Ideally we take just the bare minimum and not the many books that we own (or LPs for that matter!), hubby's guitars, really just a few odds and ends. so either sell everything else, leave it in storage here somewhere, leave it with the kid to deal with (not fond of that one because I'm not sure I would like that if I were her), toss it or give it away. I would like to be as disencumbered as is feasibly possible. We too are thinking that our living quarters will be smaller and our dream is to live in central Malaga tho I'm not sure if that is doable. I think so, just not completely sure. yea, deciding what to take is gonna be a challenge for sure! you are probably correct that the rent is not cheap in Madrid or Barcelona. not sure if that helps, but them's my thoughts. good luck!!


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## fourgotospain (May 4, 2009)

> If you retire permanently to Spain you will happier if you regard Spain as your home. In my experience, people who talk about "going home for Christmas" etc never really settle here in Spain.


I kinda of agree with this, but for us we definately have two 'homes'. 'Home' is wherever we live for now - at the moment Spain, but has been Thailand, Oz, New Zealand - and 'Home,home' is England: where our roots originate, most of our family are, where we go to see people. I don't see anything wrong with enjoying the place you live now, but feeling good about the place you've come from too.

We will probably go home home for Christmas again this year because in our family it is steeped in tradition and joy, much like Thanksgiving often is for Americans.

One thing I will say re: grandkids - we have noticed a big change in expats here once babies come along, some them find it almost unbearable to be apart from them at that stage.


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## Brangus (May 1, 2010)

Hi, Tobyo. I'm originally from Minnesota, and it cost about 2,000 euro for two of us to fly from Madrid to Minneapolis this past August. It does put a hole in one's wallet.

Once I win El Gordo, I'll make the trip more often. 




tobyo said:


> that's great but I am not sure we will have the funds to make trips like that. Once a year might even be pushing it! but good for you that you're able to do that.


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## tobyo (Jul 16, 2011)

Brangus said:


> Hi, Tobyo. I'm originally from Minnesota, and it cost about 2,000 euro for two of us to fly from Madrid to Minneapolis this past August. It does put a hole in one's wallet.
> 
> Once I win El Gordo, I'll make the trip more often.


yep. been there, done that  We took two trips to Spain in the last couple of years. Wouldn't normally do this but we got some surprise money and we just HAD to go back. so, yea, already know it's outrageously expensive. Hubby came home from buying lottery tickets and said "I've got the winning ticket." if only.....not gonna quit our jobs just yet. 

how long have you been in Spain? (if you don't mind) are working there? or did you retire there?


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## Brangus (May 1, 2010)

tobyo said:


> how long have you been in Spain? (if you don't mind) are working there? or did you retire there?


I've been in Albacete a year, having joined my husband, who had already taken a job here in a highly specialized field. Personally I'm not working (no work permit, and not many jobs to be had anyway). It's a tad boring for me at the moment, to be honest, out here in the landscape where Don Quijote went mad -- and that was without the roar of fighter jets running test flights. 

Like you, I did some university studies in Spain 25+ years ago, in Toledo. It's strange to come back somewhat unexpectedly to Castilla-La Mancha after all that time.


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## Brangus (May 1, 2010)

*Avoid bringing anything electrical.
*Don't ship bulky furniture, as you literally might not be able to get it through the door of your new place overseas. (Yes, this happened to me.)
*If you'll be living near an IKEA, try to buy things there.

That said, it can be comforting to have familiar items around you.




CompBio said:


> I hope you don't mind me jumping in, but that's a big question for us, too -- how much of our stuff to keep? 1/2, 1/3, 1/4, 1/10? Fortunately we're not too attached to things, so paring down won't be difficult. I expect our living quarters will be smaller as the best research opportunities are in major cities like Madrid or Barcelona where rent is probably not cheap.


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## Brangus (May 1, 2010)

Here's a thought. Next time you visit Spain, go inside some hospitals and clinics in the area you're thinking of retiring to.

The rare times I wish I were back in the Upper Midwest usually occur when I need medical help. In Spain (and Europe in general, I think), health care is quite different from Minnesota, though I understand things are changing in the U.S.

You often see Brits on this forum gush about how fabulous the health care is in Spain. Take that with a grain of salt. It's commendable that Spain offers universal coverage, but in my mind it's a different level of care from what we're accustomed to.




tobyo said:


> We took two trips to Spain in the last couple of years.


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## tobyo (Jul 16, 2011)

Brangus said:


> *Avoid bringing anything electrical.
> *Don't ship bulky furniture, as you literally might not be able to get it through the door of your new place overseas. (Yes, this happened to me.)
> *If you'll be living near an IKEA, try to buy things there.
> 
> That said, it can be comforting to have familiar items around you.


there's IKEA in Spain??? oh my. oh I guess. If MN now has IKEA I guess Spain seems logical to have them too. after all, Sweden is closer to Spain than the U.S.

I'd agree: don't bring any furniture. I might still bring some electrical stuff (laptop) since I already have a converter.


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## tobyo (Jul 16, 2011)

Brangus said:


> Here's a thought. Next time you visit Spain, go inside some hospitals and clinics in the area you're thinking of retiring to.
> 
> The rare times I wish I were back in the Upper Midwest usually occur when I need medical help. In Spain (and Europe in general, I think), health care is quite different from Minnesota, though I understand things are changing in the U.S.
> 
> You often see Brits on this forum gush about how fabulous the health care is in Spain. Take that with a grain of salt. It's commendable that Spain offers universal coverage, but in my mind it's a different level of care from what we're accustomed to.


interesting! yes, I have read that health care is good in Spain. interesting to see another point of view. I wouldn't qualify for their universal health care being from the U.S. tho right? isn't that just for EU members? I'm under the impression we'll have to cover ourselves with private insurance.


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## Brangus (May 1, 2010)

tobyo said:


> I wouldn't qualify for their universal health care being from the U.S. tho right? isn't that just for EU members? I'm under the impression we'll have to cover ourselves with private insurance.


Yes, you would have to purchase insurance because you haven't paid into the Spanish system. I have no experience with private insurers here, sorry.

At my house, we are not EU citizens, but hubby works for a Spanish entity and pays Spanish taxes, so we are eligible for universal care.


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## Brangus (May 1, 2010)

tobyo said:


> there's IKEA in Spain??? oh my. oh I guess. If MN now has IKEA I guess Spain seems logical to have them too. after all, Sweden is closer to Spain than the U.S.


Well, geographically Spain is closer to Sweden than Minnesota is, but having cut my teeth on pickled herring and Wasa bread, I flinch when the IKEA in Murcia serves its meatballs not with mashed potatoes but with French fries drowning in gravy. Horrors.


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## Stravinsky (Aug 12, 2007)

Brangus said:


> Yes, you would have to purchase insurance because you haven't paid into the Spanish system. I have no experience with private insurers here, sorry.
> 
> At my house, we are not EU citizens, but hubby works for a Spanish entity and pays Spanish taxes, so we are eligible for universal care.


I think you will find private health cover might be considerably cheaper here than in the US though


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## tobyo (Jul 16, 2011)

Brangus said:


> Well, geographically Spain is closer to Sweden than Minnesota is, but having cut my teeth on pickled herring and Wasa bread, I flinch when the IKEA in Murcia serves its meatballs not with mashed potatoes but with French fries drowning in gravy. Horrors.


oh my! sounds like you're from the midwest then?

I've had those meatballs here and they are YUMMY!!! I must have had mashed potatoes with them, I don't recall. it was years ago when the IKEA first opened here.


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## tobyo (Jul 16, 2011)

Stravinsky said:


> I think you will find private health cover might be considerably cheaper here than in the US though


I am certain you are correct


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## SheilaTranslate (Dec 31, 2010)

Like a lot of other Americans here have said, I go home a few times a year and I have skype.
Also, I do Thanksgiving dinner here, on a Saturday or Sunday at the end of November, whenever people can come. My fiancé's family loves it because it's so different from what they normally eat. In fact, we have to order the turkey ahead of time. If you just go right to a butcher and ask for a whole turkey that morning, they'll look at you like you have 3 heads!


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## baldilocks (Mar 7, 2010)

Brangus said:


> Here's a thought. Next time you visit Spain, go inside some hospitals and clinics in the area you're thinking of retiring to.
> 
> The rare times I wish I were back in the Upper Midwest usually occur when I need medical help. In Spain (and Europe in general, I think), health care is quite different from Minnesota, though I understand things are changing in the U.S.
> 
> You often see Brits on this forum gush about how fabulous the health care is in Spain. Take that with a grain of salt. It's commendable that Spain offers universal coverage, but in my mind it's a different level of care from what we're accustomed to.


What you really have to bear in mind in relation to the above comment about the attitude of the Brits on here is that they (if they are pensioners, and many are) get their healthcare for free. In the US you have to pay either through SocSec or insurance unless, of course, you are on one of the Medi.. plans. 

Healthcare here is mostly good, especially if you have an urgent problem, when you just go to/phone your normal healthcentre and there is invariably a medical team (Dr, Nurse and driver) available to attend to you or make house calls.


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## baldilocks (Mar 7, 2010)

tobyo said:


> there's IKEA in Spain??? oh my. oh I guess. If MN now has IKEA I guess Spain seems logical to have them too. after all, Sweden is closer to Spain than the U.S.
> 
> I'd agree: don't bring any furniture. I might still bring some electrical stuff () since I already have a converter.


Your laptop probably already works on real electricity - check the power pack it will probably say 100-250 v 50/60 cycles. No need for a converter. Definitely don't bother with electrical stuff, it's not worth it.


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## baldilocks (Mar 7, 2010)

As others have said, if you think of elsewhere as "home" then you aren't ready to retire/move/live elsewhere. Home is where you make it. My m-i-l (suegra) is of Texan stock but, as far as she is concerned she is at "home" here in Spain and we have only been here just on 3 years.

We shipped all her belongings and much of my late father-in-law's stuff with Bekins who did a very good job. A couple of bits of treasured furniture and a load of treasured china came with them too but none of the everyday stuff.

With skype you can do video calls and be "with" friends and relations as much as you wish. As always much depends on what you are looking for but keep doing your own research, it always pays off - I researched for five years before we even started looking at specifics of where to live and buying somewhere and Spain wasn't the first or only option considered.


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## tobyo (Jul 16, 2011)

baldilocks said:


> Your laptop probably already works on real electricity - check the power pack it will probably say 100-250 v 50/60 cycles. No need for a converter. Definitely don't bother with electrical stuff, it's not worth it.


but my cord is 3 pronged which won't work in Spanish outlets right? I don't think it's a converter but an adapter. I used the wrong word up there.


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## xabiaxica (Jun 23, 2009)

tobyo said:


> but my cord is 3 pronged which won't work in Spanish outlets right? I don't think it's a converter but an adapter. I used the wrong word up there.


my OH's laptop was bought in the US - he uses it all over the world with just a plug adapter

same with mine bought in Spain


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## tobyo (Jul 16, 2011)

xabiachica said:


> my OH's laptop was bought in the US - he uses it all over the world with just a plug adapter
> 
> same with mine bought in Spain


yep, that's what I did whilst traveling in Spain. worked great


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## tobyo (Jul 16, 2011)

baldilocks said:


> As others have said, if you think of elsewhere as "home" then you aren't ready to retire/move/live elsewhere. Home is where you make it. My m-i-l (suegra) is of Texan stock but, as far as she is concerned she is at "home" here in Spain and we have only been here just on 3 years.
> 
> We shipped all her belongings and much of my late father-in-law's stuff with Bekins who did a very good job. A couple of bits of treasured furniture and a load of treasured china came with them too but none of the everyday stuff.
> 
> With skype you can do video calls and be "with" friends and relations as much as you wish. As always much depends on what you are looking for but keep doing your own research, it always pays off - I researched for five years before we even started looking at specifics of where to live and buying somewhere and Spain wasn't the first or only option considered.


you know, we have had our hearts set on retiring in Malaga since going there for the first time last year. it's hard to see us changing our mind on that but I guess anything can happen huh? We have tossed around Madrid because it's a city near and dear to me and I know it so well. Barcelona has also been mentioned, alas, the sun of southern Spain really draws us. You might be able to imagine since we live in one of the coldest states in the U.S. My body is not going to be able to handle the cold forever. Last year was just plain awful!! they say we'll have a real cold snap end of December, beginning of January. I am sooooooo thankful that I work from home and don't have to go out in it every day, so that will help me survive until we can leave this frozen tundra. it's awful nice from May to October. We are having a very nice fall so far, but I digress 

It's hard for me to call anywhere "home" since I have moved around so much in my life(including one year as a junior in college in Madrid). In fact, I think I've been here in Minnesota longer than anywhere now. ewie  This is home for now, but it won't be forever. I really don't think I'll have a problem calling Malaga home when I get there. I will be drenched in sunshine, what could be better? 

thanks for the nice reply.


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## tobyo (Jul 16, 2011)

oh yea, and thanks for the moving company recommendation.


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## fergie (Oct 4, 2010)

For those moving to Spain, I would recommend 'thinning' down your clothes collection, many wardrobes here are very small, and rooms not big enough to add more storage.
I have recently moved from HK, I was a British expat there, with a 40 shipping container full of stuffs, we have had to find 'new homes' for a lot of our stuff, as we have a very big house, but very poor storage inside it.
If you have any pets, prepare them for travelling to Spain, by getting all the correct jabs and a pets passport, this normally takes 6 months prior to any travel to complete, it will prevent your doggy or cat from having to go in Quarantine. Our dog took 3 days to get here, due to the summer embargo on pets travelling, because of the intense heat, he had to travel HK to Amsterdam, then stay in the pets hotel at Schipol, then fly Amst. to Madrid, the Madrid to Alicante, poor boy was well confused and jet lagged when he got here, but settling nicely now. He had no choice but to do that trip as the only carrier with the correct hold conditions for pets was KLM.


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## Brangus (May 1, 2010)

tobyo said:


> You might be able to imagine since we live in one of the coldest states in the U.S. My body is not going to be able to handle the cold forever. Last year was just plain awful!!


Thanks for making this native Minnesotan feel better about living in Albacete.


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## tobyo (Jul 16, 2011)

Brangus said:


> Thanks for making this native Minnesotan feel better about living in Albacete.


you're welcome


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## Guest (Oct 27, 2011)

Brangus said:


> Thanks for making this native Minnesotan feel better about living in Albacete.


They've forecast 1-4" of snow for New Hampshire tomorrow. I wish I was there!!!


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## baldilocks (Mar 7, 2010)

halydia said:


> They've forecast 1-4" of snow for New Hampshire tomorrow. I wish I was there!!!


As one who occasionally suffers from frost-bite - YOU are welcome to it!


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## tobyo (Jul 16, 2011)

halydia said:


> They've forecast 1-4" of snow for New Hampshire tomorrow. I wish I was there!!!


ewie. if I'm lucky, I will only have to suffer 10 more winters. my body is already starting to creak, was out in 34F degrees tonight! brr!!! 

I agree, you can have the snow!!


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