# the big move with 2 kids? is it worth it?



## merlindale (Jun 23, 2008)

good evening everyone, we would love to move to spain, we have around 70k equity at the moment which is falling daily due to the house prices in uk. 

We have two kids, 14 and 11 who do not speak spanish, we are looking at moving to benidorm or surrounding areas, im nipping over to benidorm on sunday for a week, and wondered it anyone could suggest any areas to go visit, also which schools are best, international schools or spanish state? We have really itchy feet and are hoping to make the move around jan 
/feb.

thanks for everyones time, im new to this so all replies are thanked for in advance. shane and diane


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

Have you got a job to go to?? 70k isnt gonna get you very far, cos although house prices are falling here too, I dont think you'll find anything even half decent under about 150,000 euros. Mind you different areas tend to vary in price conciderably. Also, to buy in Spain you have to have around 10% above the purchase price to pay all the "sundries" that the government have put on. also watch out for "so called" bargains, there have alot of "illegal" builds over here and a lot of building regulations - I'm not clever enough to explain all that, but I know if something is too cheap here - there is a reason!

As for schools, we came over in Feb with a son of 13 and a daughter of 11, we put them into an international school, which in retrospect may have not been the best choice, these schools tend to keep kids feeling segregated from spanish society in my opinion, they use english as their first language and my kids really havent grasped spanish atall and of course, although cheaper than a private school in the UK, they still have to be paid for. If I did it again, I'd go for Spanish state, but it depends on your kids, the 14yo might find it hard to adjust - thats a difficult age!!!!!!!

All that said, life is much better here, more relaxed, sunshine, views, cost of living a tad cheaper ... BUT, it hasnt been easy and still isnt!

I think my top tip would be DONT BUY, RENT FOR NOW!

Good luck

Jo


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## Big Pete (Aug 7, 2007)

I would say jojo has said it all , i agree 100% with every word that came out of her pretty head .. 70k is gonna be tough unless you rent and have work ..

Why are you wanting to get out the UK , just out of curiosity


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## merlindale (Jun 23, 2008)

hi,
thanks for the advice, we want out of the uk due to a number of reasons, we do plan to rent for a while, and we have started spanish lessons, im a nurse, hubby a class 1 driver, we would not make the move until we have done our homework, my parents are currently spending 6months of the year in uk, six in torrievieja(spell?) they are both retired and in good health and it all sounds great every time i speak to them, they are thinking in moving over full time, ive heard some horror stories with the schooling there, and we have been over a couple of times and its a lovely area, but we would prefer to go somewhere we could drive and meet them rather than be on their doorstep. We have spoken to lots of families from britain, who have made the move, but their kids are toddler age, and i feel its a bit easier for them to fit in. We have been thinking of the move to spain for a long time, years in fact, and we wish we had done it when the kids were young. If we do some more homework, and we feel its not right, then we will not do it until the kids are older and out of education, but, it brings you back to the same old question, when is the right time? thanks for your replies and we have a pile of homework to do on this, and ill keep you posted as to how we are getting on,

regards diane, shane


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

I wish we'd done the move earlier, mainly cos of the kids! There is no doubt that the younger they are the easier they settle, but hey, when is the best time????? there's always something in the way!!!!!. 

My two, have actually settled quite well, although as I said, because theyre in an international school, they arent learning the language or culture very quickly. they're shy of the spanish kids that live near us and keep to themselves, only visiting their english school friends by appointment. They've now broken up from school, so this is gonna be a loooong summmmer with them hanging around bored!!!!??? But they are happy and pretty much settled

When we first got here we had a lot of "I wanna go home" and "I'm missing my friends" tears and tantrums, but thats not happening much anymore. Life here is better for them, but I wish they would intergrate a bit more. We are seriously thinking about putting my 11yo into state school in the autumn, my 13yo son will stay at the interhational school as he's now doing his GCSEs and I think a move would cause too much disruption - and he's quite a shy, sensitive flower!!!!!

I also have to say. when we moved here, the kids were really excited about the big garden. the swimming pool, the weather, nearish to a busy tourist resort.... well, thats ALL boring now and left to their own devices, they'd sit in the sitting room watching UK tv or on their PS3/Xbox most of the time - if I let em!!!! So, once the novelty's worn off - its not much different to being in the UK!! LOL

Jo


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## merlindale (Jun 23, 2008)

hi, my 14 year old is going into 4th year, sitting gcse next year, my 11 year old is just going into first year, so dont think it would be much of an up hill struggle for him, what part of spain do you live in? and if im not being too nosey, what made you go? 

diane


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

merlindale said:


> hi, my 14 year old is going into 4th year, sitting gcse next year, my 11 year old is just going into first year, so dont think it would be much of an up hill struggle for him, what part of spain do you live in? and if im not being too nosey, what made you go?
> 
> diane



We live in a town called Alhaurin de la Torre, which is about 20 mins inland from Malaga/torremolinos/benalmadena and nestles in the mountains. Although there are quite a few brits here, it is predominantly a Spanish town and of course, we're not too far away from the "bright lights" and tourist entertainment on the coast - if we feel the need!!!!?

We came here for the same reasons as most do I guess, sick of the UK, the weather, the government...... wanting sunshine, a relaxed lifestyle, space and we wanted a better life for our kids and ourselves, We've wanted to do it for years, but you know how it is... we have older kids who didnt wanna come, then we had the elderly parents we couldnt leave, work, financial ties...... My husbands mum died last summer and that was the catalyst, I felt if we left it any longer, my 13yo would be difficult. So we left our older kids (23yo and 25yo) in our UK house cos we couldnt sell it and have taken out an 11 month rental here. Husband commutes to the UK for two weeks a month to run his business over there and has plans to transfer it here - one day, although in this economic climate thats gonna be later rather than sooner!!!

I'm glad we've done it and I dont want to go back, my husband has had some second thoughts. He commutes so much, that he hasnt entered into things over here and has not settled. He slao feels that the financial and property crisis in the UK are gonna be far worse in Spain???????????? I dunno, thats our ongoing issues, which only time will sort out!

Jo


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

P.S. I would definately look into an international school for your 14yo, GCSEs are done there and could probably just be continued

Jo


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## crookesey (May 22, 2008)

The renting advice is sound, the wife and I have been looking for years and have just settled on an area, you need time to look around.

Sorry £70,000 will not go far, nearer to £125,000 plus 10% in extras. 'A Place In The Sun' has much to answer for, most of the episodes were shot 6 years ago when prices were cheaper and the pound was stronger. Amanda Lamb is now advertising high back chairs "I got it from Shackletons you know". 

Try up to 5 miles inland off the Benissa coast north of Altea, good motorway links, nice countryside, very little high rise (Calpe excepted) and chav free (unlike Benidorm). Public transport is spot on and cheap so try to find somewhere with good links to schools.

Good luck, watch out for the property sharks.


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## Stravinsky (Aug 12, 2007)

There are apartments for sale in Raffelcoffer, near Gandia, going for €70,000


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## rjnpenang (Feb 20, 2008)

JoJo has all the answers, however I cannot emphasise too strongly the problems you are going to have with your kids, they are both the wrong age to start Spanish school and spend one year in a lower class learning Spanish, and the private schools are so exspensive. My wife & I celebrating 25 years here in Mijas Costa, We have seen so many families, not just English, with teenage kids roaming the streets or working in their parents bars, or even in some cases going home to live with their grandparents, I can understand you wanting to leave the UK but why not wait another 2 or 3 years until the 14 year old is off your hands and give the 11 year old extensive Spanish lessons.
Your hubby could probably find work with the big removal firms and you as a nurse posibly in the private clinics now springing up.


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## merlindale (Jun 23, 2008)

thanks to everyone who has replied, we feel like we know loads, but when you actually speak to people who have taken the plunge we actually know nothing!! We are not looking to buy a property as we do know 70k will not be enough, we are looking to rent, for a few years anyway and hopefully we will be able to find employment of some sort to keep our heads above water, but we will not make the move until we have done all of our homework, and we have received advice from all you fab people on this forum, ive been on other forums, and some people are very hot headed when you suggest moving teenagers out of the uk school system, felt like i was getting a row from a few!! Im watching living in the sun, ha ha i hear you all say, but its the next best thing to being there, which i will be this sunday, hooray, away from the typical scottish drizzle, to hopefully some sun!!

Thanks again and ill be in touch with a load of new questions soon no doubt!!

di and shane


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

rjnpenang said:


> JoJo has all the answers, however I cannot emphasise too strongly the problems you are going to have with your kids, they are both the wrong age to start Spanish school and spend one year in a lower class learning Spanish, and the private schools are so exspensive. My wife & I celebrating 25 years here in Mijas Costa, We have seen so many families, not just English, with teenage kids roaming the streets or working in their parents bars, or even in some cases going home to live with their grandparents, I can understand you wanting to leave the UK but why not wait another 2 or 3 years until the 14 year old is off your hands and give the 11 year old extensive Spanish lessons.
> Your hubby could probably find work with the big removal firms and you as a nurse posibly in the private clinics now springing up.


I agree. But, thats is the problem we had - there is NEVER a right time, there was always something stopping us, my older kids, ex-husband, parents, work, money, commitments..... In the end we decided we couldnt leave it any longer otherwise we'd be coming out here to retire and I wanted to come out here to live with the kids as a family. Yes, we did leave it a bit late, but when the last parent "popped" off last summer (apart from pa-in-law who had alzeimers so didnt know) we decided it had to be NOW, otherwise we'd have had to have waited til 11yo was 18+ and I'm sure by then something else would have got in the way!


I think the answer is to come out as you're planning to do and have a look! You have a base with your parents, so thats a bonus


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## merlindale (Jun 23, 2008)

hi jo jo,

we have problems 2 with x husband and wife, as my husband has 2 kids who will stay here with their mum and visit for long hot summers, his kids are 11 and 14 as well, 4 boys between us, how lucky are we, i know there is never a good time but ill look into schooling and fees etc as they do vary. once ive conquered the school, then its onto an apt/villa and also which area we wish to live, and then hopefully we can make the move, life is to short to be miserable in scotland, with all the fuel going up, gas/electric, and mortgages hard to obtain and a government thats running britain into the ground!!! enuf on the political side of things, it just bugs me, and its hopefully better in spain although we will not be coming over thinking its all sunshine, sangria, sea etc, we do appreciate we will have to climate change and thats its not a holiday we are on but our new life,

thanks again for all your advice, youv been a great help


di


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## Stravinsky (Aug 12, 2007)

merlindale said:


> We are not looking to buy a property as we do know 70k will not be enough, we are looking to rent,


As I said before, there are apartments around here going for €70k .... renting is probably a good alternative at the moment and you should always try to barter on the rental figure


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## eshock44 (Jun 21, 2008)

Hi merlin

we have a similar situation here 5 kids in total 3 of them around the end of school age and 2 a lot younger the older one of those 2 being 8 this year, we do have some concerns about his education as he may find it difficult to adapt to a spanish state school as he knows next to no spanish the younger one doesnt worry us as shes only 1 atm hehe


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## chris(madrid) (Mar 23, 2008)

IMO - if you intend to make Spain your home - your nippers NEED to get into a Spanish School as fast as humanly possible. 

I've two mates in Germany whose experience I can relate. Both came from the USA. Had kids of similar ages - both had German born wives. One put his kids in a US school the other German. 

The US schooled kids shot off back to the US as soon as they could. Never learned more than VERY rudimentary German and NEVER went anywhere except US base amusements. The others integrated despite a TOUGH 6 months at first. Stayed in Germany and fully integrated. Remember however tough it is - at home they'll have an escape.

The choice is yours and to some extent theirs too. My parents gave up living in the Caribbean and returned to the UK so that my brother and I received "proper" schooling without us having to "board". I recall being told about the options - I don't recall being happy at the thought of boarding. If we'd stayed I'm sure I'd still be there though. I recall having issues adapting to the UK for a while.


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

chris(madrid) said:


> IMO - if you intend to make Spain your home - your nippers NEED to get into a Spanish School as fast as humanly possible.
> 
> I've two mates in Germany whose experience I can relate. Both came from the USA. Had kids of similar ages - both had German born wives. One put his kids in a US school the other German.
> 
> The US schooled kids shot off back to the US as soon as they could. Never learned more than VERY rudimentary German and NEVER went anywhere except US base amusements. The others integrated despite a TOUGH 6 months at first. Stayed in Germany and fully integrated. Remember however tough it is - at home they'll have an escape.


I totally 100% agree!! Sadly if we make the move when they're at an important point in their education. ie just as they start the course work for their major exams (GCSEs or Baccalaureate). then they may suffer. either by lack of qualifications or lack of language/society skills.

But yes in retrospect I wish I'd gone for a state school for mine, but I am seriously thinking of moving 11yo into state in the autumn

Jo


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## rjnpenang (Feb 20, 2008)

Welcome to Spain Diane, its 11am & its 27 degrees here on the Costa del Sol with not a cloud in sight, enjoy your stay!. Rob


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## chris(madrid) (Mar 23, 2008)

jojo said:


> I totally 100% agree!! Sadly if we make the move when they're at an important point in their education. ie just as they start the course work for their major exams (GCSEs or Baccalaureate). then they may suffer. either by lack of qualifications or lack of language/society skills.
> 
> But yes in retrospect I wish I'd gone for a state school for mine, but I am seriously thinking of moving 11yo into state in the autumn
> 
> Jo


Jo - I can empathise. I moved school/area in the UK just before I started "O" levels. It was tough - Yes. You'd be wise to get them to Summer schools if only for SPANISH. Where I work they have "summer camps" set up at the pool/library etc.


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