# Jealousy & Personal Safety



## cvgtpc1 (Jul 28, 2012)

Cebu Citizen said:


> ...and you can always carry a nice heavy coke bottle as well...hahaha...


Another item is a nice sturdy ball pen in your pocket, never leave home without it! 

A friend of mine got jumped in Chicago and that might have saved his life.


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## Maxx62 (Dec 31, 2013)

JimnNila143 said:


> My wife is exactly the same as all the other Filipina spouses mentioned here. I know how to get just about anywhere here in General Trias, and in most cases, I would feel fairly safe, if I were to go out alone, however, my wife doesn't agree with that at all. There are certain parts of Gen. Trias that even she won't go do and you can bet I won't go there either, even with her by my side. Our regular tricycle driver won't even take me anywhere, even if I ask him to without Nila being with me. Only twice did I ever go out without Nila and that was with friends who were with me. Boy did Nila get upset, she read me the riot act. It was just a simple thing that we did, the first time I really didn't like going out because I felt guilty because Nila wasn't with us. The first time, I was with a Dutch ExPat and our neighbor who was a Filipino. We went to a night club. When I got home, I got the Drill Sergeant treatment. The second time I went out, and it was just into the next barangay, I went with our friends who is a Canadian ExPat, his wife and little girl. We were away for less than an hour and still I got a good chewing for it. In fact, right now, our driver won't leave the subdivision without Nila with me. No exceptions.
> 
> I am sure that there are safe places where one could go in Cebu City bit still, it is a better choice to just have your wife/girl friend go with out, it will keep any anxiety at a bare minimum.


Sometimes I think that my own wife is more paranoid about me getting Shanghaied (stolen) by some of the shady ladies around here, than she is about me getting knocked over the head and robbed. You may have noticed that anytime you're alone by yourself at the mall, that some lady (or ladies) will come up to you and ask if you're alone. These girls are just like professional big game hunters, and they know how to pick out their prey. There's probably a few stories of naive expat husbands being taken away by such girls. Some of these girls are probably very good hunters, and some of them may not be very nice also. I think that they just don't want any strange women talking to us that's all. I'm well past the point where someone can lure me away with strange candy.


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## Cebu Citizen (Dec 13, 2013)

Maxx62 said:


> Sometimes I think that my own wife is more paranoid about me getting Shanghaied (stolen) by some of the shady ladies around here, than she is about me getting knocked over the head and robbed. You may have noticed that anytime you're alone by yourself at the mall, that some lady (or ladies) will come up to you and ask if you're alone. These girls are just like professional big game hunters, and they know how to pick out their prey. There's probably a few stories of naive expat husbands being taken away by such girls. Some of these girls are probably very good hunters, and some of them may not be very nice also. I think that they just don't want any strange women talking to us that's all. I'm well past the point where someone can lure me away with strange candy.


I agree Maxx62...the Filipina ladies do seem to have an aire of paranoia that I am sure is not completely without cause in some cases but a relationship is all about commitment and there is NO woman on earth who can steal a man away from his girlfriend, wife or fiancée unless he is not really committed to his current relationship to begin with.

If we are totally committed to the one we love, there is no reason for any level of paranoia from our significant other. Sometimes they tend to categorize foreign men in general as playboys but I have neither the will or the energy to play such tactless games with someone's heart. I do however enjoy the level of concern that my fiancée has for me because she has enlightened me to several situations that could have been "unsafe" for me had she not been with me...and I do appreciate her so much!

I may pay all the bills and provide for all of our current and future needs financially but she provides so much more in my life including my safety and well being while living in a foreign country and I truly appreciate her for that. The truth is...if she will comfortably go somewhere with me without concern, then I am also comfortable being there and have never had any unsafe situations unfold during any trips to the Philippines.

And as pointed out by others in this thread...there are far worse and more dangerous places on this planet. You won't find me in some places of south Miami or Chicago after dark, I would much rather be in the Philippines than many big cities in the US as far as safety is concerned!


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## cvgtpc1 (Jul 28, 2012)

Maxx62 said:


> Sometimes I think that my own wife is more paranoid about me getting Shanghaied (stolen) by some of the shady ladies around here, than she is about me getting knocked over the head and robbed. You may have noticed that anytime you're alone by yourself at the mall, that some lady (or ladies) will come up to you and ask if you're alone. These girls are just like professional big game hunters, and they know how to pick out their prey. There's probably a few stories of naive expat husbands being taken away by such girls. Some of these girls are probably very good hunters, and some of them may not be very nice also. I think that they just don't want any strange women talking to us that's all. I'm well past the point where someone can lure me away with strange candy.


I've only been approached at a mall once....you guys must be pretty pogi! Haha

I think its more a being stolen by other women thing too myself.

They don't want you learning the grass might be greener somewhere else!


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## Maxx62 (Dec 31, 2013)

cvgtpc1 said:


> I've only been approached at a mall once....you guys must be pretty pogi! Haha
> 
> I think its more a being stolen by other women thing too myself.
> 
> They don't want you learning the grass might be greener somewhere else!


I don't know if I'm pogi, or if maybe I just look like an easy prey? As I said, these are big game hunters.


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## redroom5 (Feb 16, 2014)

I was amazed we got to the 2nd page on this thread before someone hit the 'jealous/cautious asawa" angle. 

LOL


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## Manitoba (Jun 25, 2014)

JimnNila143 said:


> My wife is exactly the same as all the other Filipina spouses mentioned here. I know how to get just about anywhere here in General Trias, and in most cases, I would feel fairly safe, if I were to go out alone, however, my wife doesn't agree with that at all. ......


Just got to ask:

Is her concern for your safety or for the fact that there are other Filipina women out there looking for a western man.

Filipina women can be very jealous and unsecure.


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## JimnNila143 (Jul 23, 2013)

*Jealousy*



Manitoba said:


> Just got to ask:
> 
> Is her concern for your safety or for the fact that there are other Filipina women out there looking for a western man.
> 
> Filipina women can be very jealous and unsecure.


My wife takes very good physical care of me as I am up in years and not in very good health. She always has been concerned about me, even before we met face to face. She always tells me that I'm guapa [handsome] and she doesn't like other females, especially those that neither she nor I know, walking up to me and start talking. 

I know that most Filipinas, when they see a Western man, their eyes start rolling $$$$$. A true, honest and decent Filipina is usually very frugal and not materialistic. The want a man who takes good care of them and is a good provider, especially if they start a family. A lot of the scammers look at any Foreigner as a chance to make $$$$$.


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## lefties43332 (Oct 21, 2012)

JimnNila143 said:


> My wife takes very good physical care of me as I am up in years and not in very good health. She always has been concerned about me, even before we met face to face. She always tells me that I'm guapa [handsome] and she doesn't like other females, especially those that neither she nor I know, walking up to me and start talking.
> 
> I know that most Filipinas, when they see a Western man, their eyes start rolling $$$$$. A true, honest and decent Filipina is usually very frugal and not materialistic. The want a man who takes good care of them and is a good provider, especially if they start a family. A lot of the scammers look at any Foreigner as a chance to make $$$$$.


Jim youre probably guapo not guapa. Guapa is the feminine term.


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## cvgtpc1 (Jul 28, 2012)

lefties43332 said:


> Jim youre probably guapo not guapa. Guapa is the feminine term.


Nice catch! Why I stick with pogi and maganda so I don't need to remember the o and a stuff lol


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## JimnNila143 (Jul 23, 2013)

*Beomg Guapo/Guapa*



lefties43332 said:


> Jim youre probably guapo not guapa. Guapa is the feminine term.


You are correct, my finger went to the wrong key or the letter I wanted moved, dang it. My wife asks me all the time, 'Why are you so quapo?' And I tell her, 'It is because you are guapa.'


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## greggw2gs (Jul 7, 2012)

JimnNila143 said:


> I know that most Filipinas, when they see a Western man, their eyes start rolling $$$$$. A true, honest and decent Filipina is usually very frugal and not materialistic. The want a man who takes good care of them and is a good provider, especially if they start a family. A lot of the scammers look at any Foreigner as a chance to make $$$$$.


MOST Filipino women are true, honest, and decent! I get very frustrated with negative broad brush comments about Filipinos from some members here based on limited exposure versus exposure to the typical Filipino! It's a big country folks!!!


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## lefties43332 (Oct 21, 2012)

greggw2gs said:


> MOST Filipino women are true, honest, and decent! I get very frustrated with negative broad brush comments about Filipinos from some members here based on limited exposure versus exposure to the typical Filipino! It's a big country folks!!!


Most of us have lived in phils for quite awhile,,and in many vicinities and islands. What he stated holds alot of merit...not All..but many....


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## JimnNila143 (Jul 23, 2013)

*Trustworthiness*



greggw2gs said:


> MOST Filipino women are true, honest, and decent! I get very frustrated with negative broad brush comments about Filipinos from some members here based on limited exposure versus exposure to the typical Filipino! It's a big country folks!!!


Greggw,

It is true that there are a lot of true, honest and decent Filipinas, but it is also true that in a lot of places, especially in and around Angeles City, for example, a lot of young Filipinas are out looking to get money from the foreigners that are there in the area. Many young Filipinas are attracted to older foreigners because they believe the foreigner is wealthy and has big money. I have lived in the Philippines since 21 Sept 2008, I have experienced, a number of times, when young women here are attracted to older men, especially foreigners like me. I tell them from the get go that I am married and am not interested. I also avoid eye contact with them. The cultural difference here is different from Europe, Canada or America. Usually, if you make eye contact with another person, you acknowledge their presence. Otherwise you don't. Here in the Philippines, if you don't make eye contact, you never acknowledge their presence or speak to them, especially if they are a woman and most especially if you don't know them. I am not going to start a forum board war here but this is a known fact. The place where my wife and I live, it is not, by any means, a place where the 10% most wealthy of the Philippine population live. We live in an area that is considered to be a low income area, incomes of less than 25,000 pesos a month. We are known where we live and those who know us, we know them equally as well. We know most of our neighbors and have contact with them on a daily basis. Even though our neighbors are not wealthy by any means, they are very hard working people, and if they have children, they send them to good schools if they can afford to send them there. They also teach their children to honor and respect.


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## Asian Spirit (Mar 1, 2010)

JimnNila143 said:


> Greggw,
> 
> It is true that there are a lot of true, honest and decent Filipinas, but it is also true that in a lot of places, especially in and around Angeles City, for example, a lot of young Filipinas are out looking to get money from the foreigners that are there in the area. Many young Filipinas are attracted to older foreigners because they believe the foreigner is wealthy and has big money. I have lived in the Philippines since 21 Sept 2008, I have experienced, a number of times, when young women here are attracted to older men, especially foreigners like me. I tell them from the get go that I am married and am not interested. I also avoid eye contact with them. The cultural difference here is different from Europe, Canada or America. Usually, if you make eye contact with another person, you acknowledge their presence. Otherwise you don't. Here in the Philippines, if you don't make eye contact, you never acknowledge their presence or speak to them, especially if they are a woman and most especially if you don't know them. I am not going to start a forum board war here but this is a known fact. The place where my wife and I live, it is not, by any means, a place where the 10% most wealthy of the Philippine population live. We live in an area that is considered to be a low income area, incomes of less than 25,000 pesos a month. We are known where we live and those who know us, we know them equally as well. We know most of our neighbors and have contact with them on a daily basis. Even though our neighbors are not wealthy by any means, they are very hard working people, and if they have children, they send them to good schools if they can afford to send them there. They also teach their children to honor and respect.


Absolutely correct information Jim, --thanks. A board war is not possible for two reasons.

#1. You have posted information that is true and correct

#2. Any board war (should it occur) will be grounds for the banning of members involvedop2:

Thanks for posting as these things need to be said. Off hand I would say that about or at least 95% of the people (including women that are looking for marriage) are good and decent people. It is the remainder that ruin it for everyone or at least make the prospects more risky.



Jet Lag..


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## JimnNila143 (Jul 23, 2013)

*Trustworthiness*



Jet Lag said:


> Absolutely correct information Jim, --thanks. A board war is not possible for two reasons.
> 
> #1. You have posted information that is true and correct
> 
> ...


My experience in this is that yes, most Filipinas want to be married to a good man who will be good to them, treat them right and is a good provider, especially if they have children. Personally, my wife love me for me and not for what she can get from me. She knew from the start of our relationship that I am not wealthy by any means, that I do not have deep pockets filled with $1,000US bills. She knows that I am a good man who honors her and treats her right and is good to her. I agree with you 100% that at least 95% of the people (including women that are looking for marriage) are good and decent people. They only want what will help them live a better life and not have to struggle 24/7.


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## greggw2gs (Jul 7, 2012)

JetLag and Jim sum it up well! Thanks Gregg


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## Kavite Kenny (Jul 31, 2014)

My Asawa has come a long way... She used to wake up and kick me for something she saw in her DREAM! 
Ha... used to say its not safe to go to the corner sari-sari alone! She would send her 13 y/o nephew with me. Sheesh...i just wanted to buy a Coke...

I often wondered if he was there to protect me.... or assure I didn't flirt with someone.

I'm happy to report...i am permitted to walk to the corner alone! (just can't cross the street!) haha


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## greggw2gs (Jul 7, 2012)

LOL. Been married for 30 years and that jealousy is gone but the few few years was terrible. Hang in there!


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## Cherry La Chica (Nov 4, 2014)

Lol u must be very pogi guy.. haba ng hair! haha


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## greggw2gs (Jul 7, 2012)

Cherry La Chica said:


> Lol u must be very pogi guy.. haba ng hair! haha


Only on Tuesdays...


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## Maxx62 (Dec 31, 2013)

Cherry La Chica said:


> Lol u must be very pogi guy.. haba ng hair! haha


My father-in-law once said "Here in the Philippines you will think that you are as handsome as Elvis Presley, but in reality it is only your wallet that is handsome." - I don't think that he was trying to say anything negative about the local girls, but rather he was simply saying be careful in his own way.


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## colemanlee (Nov 17, 2014)

I guess I lucked out in the jealous department. Maline has never been jealous, probably because she worked for me when I was single and traveling Leyte....Its funny, after I broke up with my x I traveled all over Leyte by my self, never worried about getting attacked or mugged. Now she knows my messing around days are over, finally found what I was looking for. I could have never married someone who was jealous or suffered fits of tampo...most of the big game hunters leave me alone either cause Im old and ugly or they know I dont stray...Occasionally I go to a couple of the bikini bars here...with my wifes permission ...the girls there will talk to me but they know when its closing time...Im headed for the house.....


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## fuji0001 (May 5, 2014)

this thread is interesting and amusing. I live in So Calif with my Pinay GF who has been in the USA for 10 years; she is an RN. We are considering moving to Davao where she owns a home for retirement. SImilar to posts in this thread, she is both extremely attentive and caring, and also VERY jealous, already warning me that i will be a target, even when wee go to a local Phil party or dance club she notices if i "look". I spend a lot of time NOT LOOKING but i have great peripheral vision. But the point is if you find the right Pinay they are worth many fold any support you may provide. I only have dated asian women for a few years before meeting her, and hands down i love Pinay's and her. good luck


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## cvgtpc1 (Jul 28, 2012)

fuji0001 said:


> this thread is interesting and amusing. I live in So Calif with my Pinay GF who has been in the USA for 10 years; she is an RN. We are considering moving to Davao where she owns a home for retirement. SImilar to posts in this thread, she is both extremely attentive and caring, and also VERY jealous, already warning me that i will be a target, even when wee go to a local Phil party or dance club she notices if i "look". I spend a lot of time NOT LOOKING but i have great peripheral vision. But the point is if you find the right Pinay they are worth many fold any support you may provide. I only have dated asian women for a few years before meeting her, and hands down i love Pinay's and her. good luck


Better get it out of your system now then!!


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