# Divorce in Dubai and child maintenance



## bobby78 (Jun 20, 2016)

Hi all, I am new to this and I am not sure if I have posted in the correct area!

Please excuse me if I have.

I would like some advice as I want to divorce my abusive husband of 2 years. We are both British expats and have a 2 year old son. I am working part time and earning a very low salary now, and he has a successful business of his own. He is financially, emotionally and now physically abusive towards me with constant threats like I will lose my son if I leave and that he will not pay me a penny and he will keep our son with him and I have to move out of his house.

I cant afford to move out on my salary, can someone please tell me what I can do? I have endured this for far too long now and I feel like I am in a catch 22 situation. I cant take our son back to the UK ( I had advice from UK lawyer there they said my husband can fight for custody to bring him back here) I want us both to be in his life but my husband being the bully and intimidator he is will not make this very easy.

Can someone please offer any advice for my situation. If I file for divorce how can I live here on my very low wage. He will try to hide his money (he is very financially secure here) Or is it easier for me to drag this out and hope we will move back to the UK and I can proceed from there. (Unlikely to be any time soon).

Thanks


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## QOFE (Apr 28, 2013)

Sorry to hear about your dilemma.
There are organisations that might be able to help you with legal advice, support etc.

This organisation is for British nationals exclusively:
The British Community Assistance Fund (BCAF): Bcaf.ae

Here's a support group I have heard good things about:
Leaves Dubai - Home

Good Luck!


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## Racing_Goats (Sep 5, 2015)

Sounds like you would be safer back in the UK with your son, although financially it could be difficult - access to legal aid changed a lot in the last few years and while the CSA or whatever its called now would require your partner to pay 15% of income as child support they couldn't enforce it unless he was in the UK. Also if he has his own business he can probably declare a much lower income.

Similarly with a divorce and any financial settlement can be expensive to pursue if not amicable, and any outcome from a court can't be enforced on income or assets outside of the UK?

Sorry it's a difficult situation but still the best thing to do if he won't support you and your son if separated here (financial support and housing, maintaining your residency etc) is get out of it and back to UK, maybe once he can't control everything he might at least do the right thing financially and emotionally by his child - as you describe things now controlling and violent behaviour will be affecting your child's wellbeing if he's exposed to it, and a [email protected] can't be a good role model for any youngster.

I would think it's very unlikely any UK court would award custody to a father when there's any suggestion of domestic abuse, and even without it if he runs a business fulltime in a foreign country with no reciprocal agreement re child custody or abduction in place - they wouldn't typically gove custody to a father before the child's mother who has been main carer unless there's anything else pertinent that you haven't mentioned here.

Anyone can start over and build a new life if they really want to


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## bobby78 (Jun 20, 2016)

Thank you very much I will have a look at those links now.

Very kind of you both to reply.


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## Chocoholic (Oct 29, 2012)

You have to be very careful with this. If you try to run with your son, they could ask you at the airport if you have written permission from your husband to take him, without him being present. Sadly mothers do lose custody of their children to fathers here.

You will have to think about this VERY carefully and seek advice from professionals over your next move.


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## BedouGirl (Sep 15, 2011)

I'm wondering if the Dubai Foundation for Women and Children might help? I'm sure they're not just for nationals and, if you can get them on your side, I'm wondering if the tables can be turned on your OH.


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## Racing_Goats (Sep 5, 2015)

Chocoholic said:


> You have to be very careful with this. If you try to run with your son, they could ask you at the airport if you have written permission from your husband to take him, without him being present. Sadly mothers do lose custody of their children to fathers here.
> 
> You will have to think about this VERY carefully and seek advice from professionals over your next move.


While this is probably sound advice it's very very unlikely that a UK national would be asked for a NOC to take their own child on a plane, unless there was any past police involvement


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## twowheelsgood (Feb 21, 2013)

The only thing I can add is that your chances in a UK court are much stronger than here. 

Yes, he may have all the resources, but he would have to appear in a UK court to contest anything and the U.K. Authorities are extremely unlikely to give custody to a father who works overseas. If h does do a bunk, he could never return to the UK and any assets in the UK could be confiscated 

UK courts will tend to side with you as the mother.


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## TallyHo (Aug 21, 2011)

The only way I can see the UK courts ordering a child to be sent out of the UK is if the father was granted full custody by the British courts. Based on what you said, this is highly unlikely. 

There are divorced British families living in the UAE and the UAE courts have mandated custody and alimony payments. As the husband has a business here it will be difficult for him to avoid UAE court rulings. You have that to your advantage.

Under Sharia law (which I assume will guide the rulings) the child remains with the mother up to a certain age (nine, I think) and after that the father gets custody if he seeks it. 

All things being equal, I would much rather accept poverty and the dole in the UK over legal limbo in the UAE. Even if you accept locally mandated custody and alimony, the father probably can still prevent you from taking the child out of the country regardless of whatever rulings you may also receive from UK courts. 

Quietly go back to the UK without any notification to your husband and enact divorce proceedings from the safety of UK courts. The courts will designate alimony and custody and if your soon to be ex husband does not comply, he will not be able to return to the UK ever without getting into legal trouble. Would that be something he is willing to risk?


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## bobby78 (Jun 20, 2016)

*Thank you all..*

Lots to think hard about. Thank you all for your advice and answers. Seems like I need to plan this carefully.


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