# Primary education ADVICE PLEASE!!!



## kiwikids (Feb 5, 2013)

Ok team... on the verge of a serious mental and emotional breakdown and asking for advice from those who have 'been there'!! 
Background - I'm a kiwi who has lived in the UK for 11 years (therefore currently feeling much like an expat!). Have 3 'poms' 6,4 and 13mths. Hubby (Welsh don't hold it against him!) is still in the UK currently working and due out in March. 
Our 6 year old has just started school. There was much discussion based around which year group he should be placed in due to his age. He is a late April baby and therefore would offically be in Yr 2 based on NZ education system (however has completed 2 terms more of education than he would have if he'd been here). 
Due to the fact he has a cousin who is 6 weeks older than him at the same school we argued the case for putting him in a year 3 class. this was agreed by the school. 2 days in they want to move him to a Year 2 class. 
He does have difficulty with reading (family history of dyslexia and strong indications that he has this difficulty) but socially and emotionally he is in line with his peers in the year 3 setting. Friends here are saying there would be a huge gap for him socially if we moved him to the yr 2 class... School are saying that chn who move from the UK are 'behind' (errr! that's another thread!) and therefore should move him. i really need some advice... please let me knowwhat you think! Thanks xx


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## jenswaters (Jul 8, 2009)

Oh you poor thing!!! How stressful. 
Ok, this really is a tough one. What are your gutt instincts? Or are you getting so much advice for both sides that you dont know anymore?!
I have a son who, when we moved here, displayed higher than average numeracy and literacy skills, and higher level thinking than his peers.My friend is a primary teacher and she recommended I put him up a year. The school didn't move him up, although were open to the possibility of moving him if seen fit. I am actually glad that they didn't move him in all honesty. They have excelled him and out him in higher groups for reading and maths, bit his writing isn't as good, so they keep him with 'regular' level children. 
Ultimately, they have a very good understanding of capabilities, and you have a good understanding of your child socially. I would arrange a meeting with your sons teacher and the principal (if you haven't already) and talk through things. Ask for their reasoning etc and see if there is a compromise. 
Sorry, I wish I could be more help. I hope you manage to sort it out for the best.


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## kiwikids (Feb 5, 2013)

Hi thanks so much for replying!!!... yes feeling a bit stressed!
It's a tricky, i am a NZ trained teacher and have been teaching in the UK in SEN so have understanding of the UK standards. I feel very torn as as a teacher i understand the schools view but as a parent feel that he 'fits' emotionally. 
The other aspect is that we are at a 'stop-gap' currently (not the ideal situation for the children at all!!) and unlikely to settle permenantly in Tga. therefore if the need arises to change his placement to yr 2 it could be done when we move to settle permanently. He was a very reluctant emigrant (which i'm sure most chn are) and has often struggled with settling in school - he seems so happy where he is i feel awful putting him in that new situation again so soon! to then possibly move him once again! I also feel that schools here have a level of flexibility in moving chn (which is unheard of in the UK) so for the moment to keep him where he is?!??


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## jenswaters (Jul 8, 2009)

I'm in Tauranga too!!! Wanna meet up for a coffee and talk about it?


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## Guest (Feb 5, 2013)

Just my personal opinion- but I would think more long term. He might do well in a higher class NOW but what happens when he is 12, 13, 14, etc. (when schooling really begins to matter) Is he going to be at the same social/mental level of his classmates?


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## kiwikids (Feb 5, 2013)

Hi guys, thanks for your thoughts! I'm back to school to or row to discuss so will keep you posted. Jen would be lovely to meet up if you are around... Not sure of protocols to arrange and my iPad about to go flat.... Will check in tomorrow to here from you


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## Liam(at)Large (Sep 2, 2012)

I would trust the evaluation of the school system, it's their job to look out for the best interest of your children.


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## topcat83 (Apr 16, 2009)

Liam(at)Large said:


> I would trust the evaluation of the school system, it's their job to look out for the best interest of your children.


Hm. I think it depends on the school and the teacher. There are certain teachers that my sons had who, with hindsight, had anything but the best interest of my children in mind. 

I think that it is the _parent's_ ultimate job to look out for the best interest of their children. You have to look at each situation independently and as a parent make the decision that you think is best for your child. After all, usually it is the parent that has known the child the longest.


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## bleater (Mar 21, 2012)

Born in April, your child is definitely in the "grey zone" when it comes to school year. However, based on what I've seen with our school-age son and his peers, putting your son into year 2 would be the norm anywhere in NZ.

The early classroom learning is primarily focussed on reading, and if you push to have your child in a year 3 class with children whose reading ability is significantly ahead, you're not doing him any favours.

You're perhaps also stressing unnecessarily over the need for your boy to be in class with the kids you perceive to be his peers socially. That kind of thing matters a lot less than we parents think... in the playground at break and lunchtime, kids play with years above and below too, if they're so inclined socially. Take care not to also project your own anxieties about the situation onto your boy. All kids are nervous in new situations, and if he feeds off your feeling that putting him into year 3 will "fix" that, you've created an issue that didn't need to be there in the first place.


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## Nouranour (Feb 21, 2013)

I am kind of in the same boat. We are moving to Auckland from Egypt at the end of July .
Our youngest boy who is 6 will be able to finish his year 1 at school here in Egypt in June this year .I am wondering if he would be placed into year 1 again in New Zealand or is there a chance he can join year 2 in the middle of the year? He has been in going to American school and international kindergarten so his English is great. Please, any advise would be appreciated!


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