# Updates of Dubai and PDAs (Public Displays of Affection)



## IzzyBella (Mar 11, 2013)

Just a general query on Dubai and PDAs as it stands today (2013).

All the material I read are of the outdated *"it's illegal to hold hands, let alone HUG!"* variety. Where I appreciate the religion and respect the local customs, I've observed several "non-Sharia" greetings and I'd just like some clarification as to whether things are tolerated/acceptable/unacceptable.

My understanding is as follows:-

Holding hands_ - tolerated by Emirati, acceptable to most expats. Fine with same sex hand holding._
Legally, equal rights for married and unmarried couples to show PDA_ - yet if people decide to be offended, unmarried couples would get into far more trouble (holding hands, kiss on cheek, hugs) than married couples._
Kiss on cheek_ - tolerated as a greeting or farewell as there are so many European expats. Usually less offending if same sex are to kiss cheeks._
Hugs_ - unsure. Have witnessed younger people of opposite sex greet one another this way but not anyone older than, say, 20._
Kiss on lips_ - not tolerated unless 2 men were to greet. Usually, unacceptable._
Proper kissing (with tongue)_ - not tolerated, completely unacceptable._

Some things I'm unsure about:

Hugging _- I've seen (younger) people, often teenagers, hug opposite sex friends as greetings and I'd like to know if this is acceptable as I naturally go in for the hug when I greet a friend. I've already hugged a male friend in public without thinking only to click afterwards and say, "I'm not sure if we are allowed to do that!" _
Peck on the lips_ - I'm not after a full on snog/french kiss. I'm quite happy we're not allowed to do that in public._
Greeting Emirati women_ - shaking hands, talking directly to them, etc?_
Greeting Emirati men_ - shaking hands, bothering to talk to them as I'm merely a "woman", etc_
Being a "Western woman" _- entering lifts alone with Emirati men, accidentally finding myself alone with them, etc._

I'd like to see some advice/response about being a Western/expatriate woman and also, conversely, the male version of the customs. e.g. (If you're male) how do you greet Emirati women, if at all? etc. 

All advice, observations and views muchly appreciated. 

(... and also insight to how the Emirates differ would be nice/informative)


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## Fat Bhoy Tim (Feb 28, 2013)

IzzyBella said:


> Just a general query on Dubai and PDAs as it stands today (2013).
> 
> All the material I read are of the outdated *"it's illegal to hold hands, let alone HUG!"* variety. Where I appreciate the religion and respect the local customs, I've observed several "non-Sharia" greetings and I'd just like some clarification as to whether things are tolerated/acceptable/unacceptable.
> 
> ...


You've got the gist of it. 

When it comes to Emirati women, or any woman that for that matter, wait for them to put out their hand. If they don't, put your hand over your heart - that will suffice. Generally this only applies to men meeting women, and not for women meeting other women, but I'd stick to the safe option.

For Emirati men, it will depend on them. They'll be waiting for you, and whilst quite a few of them would probably be fine with offering a hand to shake, there will be the off few that won't be. I'd recommend immediately sticking to hand-on-heart until you know them better.

As for the rest, it really depends on where you are and who's around. To be on the safeside, with someone of opposite sex that's not family/spouse - stick to holding hands.


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## colaxs (Nov 26, 2012)

Hi

Hugging isn't a big deal in Dubai in my experience. Plenty of hugs especially at the airport so no worries there.

Peck on the lips is best reserved indoors when you're surrounded by people you're familiar with. It's not worth it offend someone's sensitivities here and we should be respectful of local concerns.

Like Fat Bhoy Tim mentioned, when I meet any Arab lady, I wait for them to greet me so I can respond in kind. If someone smiles, I smile back. If they extend their hand, I shake it. It ensures that I don't put them in an uncomfortable spot.

I would assume that when you meet Emirati or any GCC male, it's best to see if they offer to shake hands, otherwise it's better to stick to the safer option of a nod and a smile.

Don't fret about being a "western" woman in the situations you outlined above. Since when is that a negative thing in the UAE? I've found UAE nationals to be pretty laid back and friendly with a fair bit of tolerance. You would have to go out of your way to offend them.

Cheers


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## IzzyBella (Mar 11, 2013)

colaxs said:


> Hi
> 
> Hugging isn't a big deal in Dubai in my experience. Plenty of hugs especially at the airport so no worries there.
> 
> ...


*I CAN HUG MY FRIENDS!*
:clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2: 

That's great, as it's something I'm really accustomed to and I'd hate to offend anyone.

The Western woman thing only effects me when I find myself in strained situations. (1) Having gotten on a lift with Emirati men and (2) wandered around a shop near a group of them - they both responded similarly by going quiet and avoiding eye contact. I did the obvious thing I do and beamed a big smile at them but it doesn't relax the situation any. I just wondered if I'm supposed to not acknowledge them either or wait for another lift, etc?

The funniest thing I've noticed about myself is that I am acute to local customs and as a result I've not been as vocal talking to strange men (i.e. male strangers, not just the weird ones) as usual (most my friends at home are male...I just get on with them better), I am often found skulking one step behind philyand and often trying to be invisible/small. HAHA! 

I have no idea why, I'm usually much more of a centre-of-attention/outspoken kind of girl.

The only thing I haven't gotten the knack of is not eating with my left hand, but that's because I was always encouraged to eat with my hands. My mother, being Thai, didn't impart the "left hand shouldn't be used" as we were in England. I'm sure she chastised me at first then realised it was irrelevant.


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## Tropicana (Apr 29, 2010)

IzzyBella said:


> [*]Kiss on lips_ - not tolerated unless 2 men were to greet. Usually, unacceptable._
> [/LIST]
> )


This is not seen even among men !

Some men will greet close friends by rubbing noses or cheeks, but nothing wrt lips..

Holding hands is perfectly fine, its just that you may be started at a bit more in some areas.


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## IzzyBella (Mar 11, 2013)

Tropicana said:


> This is not seen even among men !
> 
> Some men will greet close friends by rubbing noses or cheeks, but nothing wrt lips..
> 
> Holding hands is perfectly fine, its just that you may be started at a bit more in some areas.


Maybe they were rubbing noses. I assumed kissing!


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## fcjb1970 (Apr 30, 2010)

Tropicana said:


> This is not seen even among men !
> 
> Some men will greet close friends by rubbing noses or cheeks, but nothing wrt lips..
> 
> Holding hands is perfectly fine, its just that you may be started at a bit more in some areas.


Local males will bump noses and sort of kiss the air between them. They may do with other Arabs that they are very familiar with (but this is rare, I have only seen with people who I know worked together for like 20 years).

Some Arab or Persian males will do a little half kiss on both cheeks when greeting. Kind of similar to how South Americans of the opposite sex will normally greet each other. Having worked in South America I far prefer this greeting style to here where you are unsure about even shaking the hand of a woman


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## vantage (May 10, 2012)

When shaking hands, don't go in for the Western knuckle-buster.
An Arab hand shake is a far more genteel affair...


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## IzzyBella (Mar 11, 2013)

vantage said:


> An Arab hand shake is a far more genteel affair...


That's really good to know. That being said, however, I am afflicted with Limp Hand Syndrome when it comes to handshakes as I feel completely out of place (aka I'm not old enough to shake people's hands aka I'M NOT A GROWN UP YET!)


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## m1key (Jun 29, 2011)

IzzyBella said:


> That's really good to know. That being said, however, I am afflicted with Limp Hand Syndrome when it comes to handshakes as I feel completely out of place (aka I'm not old enough to shake people's hands aka I'M NOT A GROWN UP YET!)


Stop listening to One Direction and you'll start to feel more grown-up 

PS - Doesn't matter how old you are, you never feel grown-up.


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## Fat Bhoy Tim (Feb 28, 2013)

vantage said:


> When shaking hands, don't go in for the Western knuckle-buster.
> An Arab hand shake is a far more genteel affair...


With my male Emirati friends, I barrel right in for the ol' nose-kissing.


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## sheesha.addict (Apr 21, 2013)

Fat Bhoy Tim said:


> With my male Emirati friends, I barrel right in for the ol' nose-kissing.


Lol that made me chuckle! I do to, but not all of them! 

Just so everyone is clear, be careful because some are a bit more accepting than others even though I am originally arab myself. Definitely don't do it to an Emirati who you don't know extremely well unless they go for it first. (It is only done between men, woman and men generally do not touch noses)


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