# Potential move to Dubai



## GMarginet (Jul 29, 2013)

My husband and I are considering an offer from a company to move to Dubai.
Most of the info I'm reading online seems to tell me its NOT the right place for a gay couple in their late 30's. We are definitely not in the "party scene" anymore, as a matter of fact, we live a pretty quiet lifestyle since we have been together 13 years.
I would love to get a real sense of everyday life in Dubai from people living there.
Thank you very much!!


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## QOFE (Apr 28, 2013)

GMarginet said:


> My husband and I are considering an offer from a company to move to Dubai.
> Most of the info I'm reading online seems to tell me its NOT the right place for a gay couple in their late 30's. We are definitely not in the "party scene" anymore, as a matter of fact, we live a pretty quiet lifestyle since we have been together 13 years.
> I would love to get a real sense of everyday life in Dubai from people living there.
> Thank you very much!!


I consider it a risky move for you seeing as both civil law and Sharia criminalize gay activity here. All it takes to get caught and brought to court is a disgruntled colleague or neighbour who reports it.


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## dizzyizzy (Mar 30, 2008)

There are some same sex couples living here, very discreetly, but you have to be aware of the fact that is illegal and if caught, the consequences will be harsh (deportation at the very least, but possibly even jail).

Same sex couples who decide to take this risk should be extremely discreet, get a house with 2 bedrooms, keep a very low profile, avoid rows with neighbors, avoid any situation where police may get involved, etc.


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## TallyHo (Aug 21, 2011)

There is a pretty big gay scene in Dubai, much bigger than I had thought courtesy of my coworkers. Apparently the way the law works is that being gay isn't illegal but homosexual acts are. 

Like a lot of laws in Dubai, it's all about being discreet and not flouting it. There's at least two well established clubs that have 'gay' nights, and yes, the authorities know about them. I was at one of the 'gay' clubs once for a coworker's birthday night and it seemed like as long no one kissed or engaged in explicit actions, anything went. Actually, the night I was at the club an Emirati man in full regalia came into the club and walked behind the bar with the authority of an inspector or government official but no one batted an eye. 

If you were to rent a two-bedroom flat in the Marina or Downtown (popular expat areas) and don't show PDA in public, the odds are that nothing will happen to you. Since so many people share flats you won't raise any eyebrows. The handful of gays I know seem pretty happy here.


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## boris&L (Aug 7, 2013)

*no worries !*



GMarginet said:


> My husband and I are considering an offer from a company to move to Dubai.
> Most of the info I'm reading online seems to tell me its NOT the right place for a gay couple in their late 30's. We are definitely not in the "party scene" anymore, as a matter of fact, we live a pretty quiet lifestyle since we have been together 13 years.
> I would love to get a real sense of everyday life in Dubai from people living there.
> Thank you very much!!


Hello guys, 

Just came across your post. We are a gay couple and we've been living in Dubai (together) for the past 10 years. We've been married (in the UK) since 2007 and we are perfectly happy and safe. 

The secret is to keep your life private, and choose carefully the friends you would come out to. After all it's Dubai, and nasty people could do more damage to us being gay. 

I agree with the rest there is a big gay community in Dubai, but I would definitely stay away from anything too gay  .. we usually go out to restaurants and bars with our friends (all of them straights), since we couldnt really find any reliable gay friends here.

The rest of the time, we usually host dinner parties. We had good gay friends here in Dubai, but unfortunately they all left throughout the years. 

Couples like us (and probably like you) are tucked away and very discreet, so you wouldn't really hear much about the real gay couple life in Dubai. 

We use to live in a villa then we opted for the functionality of a flat. You are better off taking at least a two bedroom flat. If you do villa, make sure it it is private enough. 

For the maid issue, we never had any problem. They are use to it and usually if you take care of them (tips, some money before they go on holiday etc ..) you will get yourself lloyal good maid. 

There are plenty of things we could advise you for, so dont hesitate to private message us. 

Hope you have made it safely to Dxb .

cheerio


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## GMarginet (Jul 29, 2013)

Thank you everyone for the feedback..

The interviews continue and we are getting closer to having to make a decision.

Im not gonna lie and tell you that we are 100% on board with moving from the US. It still worries us that we may get thrown in jail or something crazy. 

We do appreciate everyone's response and any more comments or feedback will most certainly be welcomed.


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## sammylou (Oct 29, 2012)

one thing that hasn't been mentioned but you need to consider, are visas. i can't tell from the OP if you are both considering job offers as you work for the same company or if it's just one of you? if both, then you will both get your visa sponsored by the company.

if only one of you is taking the job then the other will have to enter on a visit visa and as you will not be able to sponsor one another, then that person will either need to find a job or do a visa run every month.

just something else to consider.


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## saraswat (Apr 28, 2012)

^^That is a very good point !^^


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## XDoodlebugger (Jan 24, 2012)

GMarginet said:


> Thank you everyone for the feedback..
> 
> The interviews continue and we are getting closer to having to make a decision.
> 
> ...


Just so you know, as a single heterosexual man I would also be breaking the law if I have sex with a woman out of wedlock. Thank God I have decided to remain a virgin until married to avoid participating in criminal activity 

Not sure how all these single expats deal with their celibacy if they haven't been saving themselves like me? And why are all those women hanging out in the bars offering to take me home and do unspeakable acts if the things they are offering are illegal here?


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## Enzoo (May 15, 2012)

GMarginet said:


> Thank you everyone for the feedback..
> 
> The interviews continue and we are getting closer to having to make a decision.
> 
> ...


just be discreet , no public displays of affection and you two will be fine , its all a matter of thinking that you are in a strange land and they have laws that we will follow . good luck to both of you coming here .


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## JonGard (Aug 18, 2013)

Good luck to you both when you come. I can only concur with all the above, I've several friends here who are just discreet, and never have any bother at all.


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## Canuck_Sens (Nov 16, 2010)

GMarginet said:


> Im not gonna lie and tell you that we are 100% on board with moving from the US. It still worries us that we may get thrown in jail or something crazy.
> 
> We do appreciate everyone's response and any more comments or feedback will most certainly be welcomed.


 This is something that you folks have to think more thoroughly. I have gay friends that wanted to live here and wanted to know if they could cope with the "restrictions", but totally backed off after learning the potential fallout. They felt they would be denied basic acquired rights and incur a not acceptable risk.

What is your main reason to move ? Money ? Different country/ culture ? Occupation challenge ? Is it for the short term ?

Whatever your motives are, are they enough to outweigh or accept what is more important to your relationship? 

I think this is very important because you folks are from the US and Several States are now changing their laws to improve the quality of life of gay fellas and several couples had actually left their home states so that they could live better lives. Boston is one very friendly city for example.

I dont know but if I could not hold hands with my partner or show some affection would be hard. As a straight person I had shown sings of affection couple of times (not permitted) and this is because I am well informed, but I am an emotional creature too.


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## GMarginet (Jul 29, 2013)

Thank you all once again for the feedback.

We have decided not to make the move to Dubai.
Im sure it may sound a little "closed minded" but we really believe that at this point in our lives we dont want to be pushed back "into the closet"

If the penalty was deportation, i dont think we would have a problem. Being thrown in jail is not something we want to be worried about. 

Again, thank you all very much for all the responses.


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