# Commitment Phobic Chinese Girl.



## infinitethoughts (Apr 8, 2013)

Hey guys, the title says it all and apparently this is a huge deal in this country.

I'm right in the middle of a one with this girl and I've definitely decided to stick it out with her, but the main question I have is does anyone know if they have Psychologists in China that I can have her go to ?

I mean how does one get professional help with this sort of thing in the Middle Kingdom ?

If anybody knows anything let me know.

Cheers.


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## dhream (Jan 30, 2012)

*Tell me you are not serious!*

Okay, 

So you are looking for a shrink to make a girl who does not want to commit to see it your way?

Ummm, would this pass muster in the US or anyplace else?

We think not.

Move on.

or... get YOURSELF to a shrink. 

Seriously, this is a disturbing post you just made padre, and somehow, you seem to have convinced yourself that because you are in China -it's all cool.

You may hate me for saying this, of COURSE you will, but if you press on, it will end very very badly for you, I'm seeing Orange jumpsuit.

 PS: I'm married to a Chinese -before you come back with some BS rationale...


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## infinitethoughts (Apr 8, 2013)

No worries. I can take criticism.

You could be right. Only reason I posted the above was I've read a bunch of articles where they talk about the situation of women in china.

First there's the lack of love from father cause the majority of fathers want boys, not girls. Of course there are exceptions. This girl does have issues with her dad.

Then you have the attitude towards women in china. The male is king, women are not.

All this does mind games on them. Which sucks and it's a big problem that no-one really talks about.


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## dhream (Jan 30, 2012)

infinitethoughts said:


> No worries. I can take criticism.
> 
> You could be right. Only reason I posted the above was I've read a bunch of articles where they talk about the situation of women in china.
> 
> ...


Ok I get you, and sorry for busting your chops, your first post sounded a bit psycho..
it's hard online to gauge a person by a post... and easy to go in hard...as I did 

Ok this may get ME flamed...but, Chinese girls (of any nationality) do have cultural Daddy issues, my wife being no exception. You got to roll with it. Culture is bigger than all of us, we westerners have a bunch of stuff that really perplex the Chinese, and when you sit down with them, you understand that too...
The danger here is, she may be using her cultural perspective to let you down gently. We've all been in love, but I'm going to make a leap of assumption and guess you are a younger man, whatever, younger or older, there are ALWAYS better girls/guys ahead of the 'one you just can't live without' and it's the people who can figure this out -that find the person they REALLY should be with. The unfortunate few, at worst, end up in hell on earth, usually of their own making, please don't go there... (orange jumpsuit)  Let me hand it over to an infinitely wiser legend... Buddha 'All pain comes from attachment' let go... and live to love another day, peace.


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## infinitethoughts (Apr 8, 2013)

Yeah.....that might be the course to take.


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## natesiy (Jan 29, 2013)

I can't comment on China in general, but in my experience here over the last decade, i've found most girls to be the exact opposite. They're overly committed, ie. marriage and kids, in a very short time frame.


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## CountTuscany (Feb 27, 2013)

This post makes me think.... of posting another thread. Let's see what we have here...


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## rogerluli (Nov 4, 2008)

I (American) have been married to a Chinese woman for 8 years now...It is simple really...Her "fear of commitment" = she is really not that into you and your life together prospects...Time to move on...So many fish in the sea, so little time...


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