# Second Marriage without the consent of first wife



## jazzbert120391

Sallam Alaikum!

I need your help, please let me know the legal advice for me.
I am Filipina Muslim and want to marry this Pakistani Muslim man, we love each other so we want to get marry to make it legal. But were facing some problem now, he has a first wife and with 2 kids but his first wife is not connected to him before 3 years ago. 2 kids are with his parents and his first wife leave him 3 years ago and i dont know what is the real problem. So now when my BF go in his Consulate in Dubai they told him, he need the consent of the first wife before he can marry me. But my BF dont want to make any request to his first wife, (maybe in their past they have some big problems) so now we dont know what to do. Please help me to know, we are too much upset because we thought we can marry..
Is it required to have the consent of the first wife? Please i need your help..


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## vantage

i suggest your BF deals with his problems and talks to his first wife.
If that's what you are told you need to do, i would think that is what you need to do....
There are children involved, so do it properly.


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## pamela0810

First option: Why doesn't he divorce his first wife? All he needs is a witness to do this.

Second option: Why don't you talk to the wife? If everything the BF is saying is true and the wife indeed left him 3 years ago, I'm sure he won't have a problem with you talking to her?

Third option: Insist that he talks to his wife and marries you or it's over between the 2 of you. If you are ok with being a second wife, surely he should be ok with just making some effort

Fourth option: Leave because it seems like he wants a wife back home and a girlfriend out here and will just keep stringing you along with a million excuses.


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## saraswat

gronk said:


> Look, be careful bcz those 3rd world counties have ****ed up traditions and terroristic groups in there hood.
> Stay safe


Are you serious ??!!?? "Terroristic groups" .....

Dude first off, go get a thesaurus/dictionary and get better with the English language. That's not only a friendly thought but also one related to the rules, using 'bcz' instead of 'because' _aint cool bro !!_...

Now coming to the utter ignorance portrayed in your post, please keep such ridiculous over arching generalizations to yourself and off the forum. Lest I remind you that quite a few of the 'foreign fighters' in the conflicts/activities you elude to, do in fact come from your part of the world....

Point is don't make broad strokes statements, they just make you look ignorant ...


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## mehranR

So just to let you know,
A mulla, imam or sheikh can and will get you married, they also have a BOOK that registers their marriage. Now here comes the tricky part, you don't have to get it registered if you don't want to and at this point the two have had a religious marriage and not a legal one. The OP wants to have a legal marriage not a spiritual one. 
Now call this backward or third world terrorist or whatever. I don't think you have the slightest idea about anything, because whatever religion, society and group of people you pick, tend to have flaws. There is no perfect system.


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## AsadRoman

So sad to see some people reaction and Un awareness of marriage LAWS according to specific religion.

To make sure i hope you would read some of this .
Before responding to the this question, a comment must be made regarding an objectionable and reprehensible issue implied in the question, and that is the mentioning by the sister that he “falls in love with another woman”. It is known that it is not permissible in the Islamic religion the establishment of a relationship between a man and a woman who is ajanabiyya to him (lit. foreign, i.e., marriable) before marriage, for Allah revealed in Surat al-Maa’ida (the Table), ayah 5 a verse whose meaning can be translated as:

“This day are (all) things good and pure made lawful unto you. The food of the People of the Book is lawful unto you and yours is lawful unto them. (Lawful unto you in marriage) are (not only) chaste and virtuous women who are believers, but chaste women among People of the Book, revealed before your time, when you give them their due dowers, and desire chastity, not lewdness, nor secret intrigues. If any one rejects faith, fruitless is his work, and in the Hereafter he will be in the ranks of those who have lost (all spiritual goo).

And as for the original matter of the question, Allah subhanahu wa-ta’ala who is al-Hakim (All Wise) al-Khabir (All Experienced) and who is more knowledgeable about the human beings He created than they themselves are about themselves, has ordained that a man is allowed to marry whom he wills among women as long as he does not bond in marriage under his care and responsibility more than four women. And this is conditioned upon him dealing justly among them the known justice specified by shari’a which includes overnight stays and spending. If he does not have the ability and capacity to deal with such justice, then he should suffice with one, as Allah indicates in Surat al-Nisaa’ in ayah 3, which has a meaning that can be translated as:

marry women of your choice, two, or three, or four; but if you fear that you will not be able to deal justly (with them) then only one.

According to rules of marriages in Pakistan. I would suggest to ask your BF to Make a visit to Pakistan get a divorce through Court (If he is not intended to meet the First wife). When he has the Divorce. Then he is free to marry you according to your demand (HAQ Mehr).

Please bear that in mind that even if your BF asks to marry you as it is allowed to marry more then 1 women in ISLAM , but that had some conditions.

So sister we would pray for your issue to be tackled. In Sha ALLAH

Asalam O alaikum


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## hubbly_bubbly

How about starting with the basics of Pakistani divorce law - without the all the speculative mumbo-jumbo for and on behalf of the alleged creator of the universe - as the basis of your legal advice?

LAW OF DIVORCE & KHULA IN PAKISTAN


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## shampk

ISLAM gives the right to a muslim man to marry without consent of his first wife but according to PAKISTAN law a man need to get consent in written form for second marriage because there is no involvement of divorce.


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## Stevesolar

shampk said:


> ISLAM gives the right to a muslim man to marry without consent of his first wife but according to PAKISTAN law a man need to get consent in written form for second marriage because there is no involvement of divorce.


Great answer - only two years late for the original poster!


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## uberkoen

I wonder whatever became of this issue. Could the OP please update us?


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## imac

Stevesolar said:


> Great answer - only two years late for the original poster!


you have to wonder what he was searching for that led him to a two year old thread...


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## Felixtoo2

OP is probably on his 3rd marriage by now!


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## Najma

Is there any update on this situation? I'm on the same situation on getting married on a married man..please anyone can update me?


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