# single mom moving to the US



## dreamerkitty (Oct 2, 2013)

hey everyone
I need advice from single parents who have made the move to another country. I work for an international pharmaceutical company and I have the possibility to move to the US to work in our office based in Philly. I have always wanted to travel and when I found out I was pregnant, I put my dreams aside to become a mom.
But now that I have the opportunity to travel, I am so excited to have a second chance!arty: :usa:
But I know no one in the US, most of my family members and friends are either in Belgium or England. 
I am not worried about the language because I speak english with my 2 year old daughter. But would like to hear about your experiences, even if in a different country. 

I was also wondering, how are the daycare centers in Philadelphia? what area should I avoid? any suggestions for furnished rentals? what about the cost? 

Any advice or information would be great. Thanks!

Kate


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## AbdulBaqi (Sep 19, 2013)

dreamerkitty said:


> hey everyone
> I need advice from single parents who have made the move to another country. I work for an international pharmaceutical company and I have the possibility to move to the US to work in our office based in Philly. I have always wanted to travel and when I found out I was pregnant, I put my dreams aside to become a mom.
> But now that I have the opportunity to travel, I am so excited to have a second chance!arty: :usa:
> But I know no one in the US, most of my family members and friends are either in Belgium or England.
> ...


Being in a foreign country such a far distance from your family is going to be hard, especially if you have a small child. Think hard about this before you do it, and I would recommend visiting before you move to get a better feel of the place and your feelings of living there. I can tell you that furnished rentals anywhere in America are hard to find and very expensive, usually never worth the cost unless you make tons of money and you don't care that the stuff you will use is not yours and it will be out of your pocket if something goes wrong with it (again, small children problem. I speak from current and past experience with this). I cannot speak for Philly as I have never been there, but a one bedroom furnished apartment in a city such as Philly could easily cost $1,000+ (again this could be slightly less or more depending on the exact area). If you want me to take a stab at the costs you might face as a single parent with a child, you could guess that your monthly expenses will be roughly:

$1,000+ for rent
$100 for water
$100-150 for power
$50-100 for gas if you get a car
car payment? unknown
insurance on rental or car? unknown
$200-400 for food
children expenses? $200? Maybe
Entertainment and clothing are always hard guesses
$100 or less for Cable/Internet


Traveling by yourself with your child will be hard on you, so you might want to wait until you get a partner. It would be easier if you could give us an idea of how much you would be making.


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## dreamerkitty (Oct 2, 2013)

Thank you so much for your reply!
I understand that moving away from family is very very hard but I have always wanted to travel and my gutt is telling me to go 
I was actually thinking that it's best to move now before my daughter goes to school.

It costs quite a lot !
Maybe unfurnished would be a better solution indeed! I will definitely go there to have a look before taking a decision.
I make around 2000 USD


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## AbdulBaqi (Sep 19, 2013)

dreamerkitty said:


> Thank you so much for your reply!
> I understand that moving away from family is very very hard but I have always wanted to travel and my gutt is telling me to go
> I was actually thinking that it's best to move now before my daughter goes to school.
> 
> ...


Again those are rough estimates, you can expect them to be higher due to inner-city living or non-existent depending on what you do /decide is needed. Unfurnished is always cheaper, and the best option is to use craigslist dot com to find used cheap furniture (you can always haggle the prices, which is quickly going away in America with the exception of that website, flea markets, similar places). If you do use that website, make sure you go with a friend and leave your child somewhere you trust as people have been known to use the website to lure people into bad situations, so just be careful and plan ahead. Don't forgive the costs of moving any of your stuff, which can be expensive if you have enough stuff to transport on a cargo ship. Do you mean 2,000 USD a month? Is that currently or the job you would have in America? If so, you would be living pretty roughly with yourself and a small child in the city. Even in the suburbs it would be hard. Always make sure your finances are set before traveling, especially with children (again, past experiences, good and bad).


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## Bevdeforges (Nov 16, 2007)

Furnished rentals are not nearly as common in the US as in parts of Europe. You may need to ask your employer for assistance in finding a place to live as rentals in the US usually involve a credit check, and as a newcomer to the US you will have no credit history (at least not in the US records).

Another factor to consider is that you will need some sort of "consent" from your child's father in order to get her a passport and/or visa. If the father is no longer available, you'll need a court order granting you sole custody. They can get very sticky about this in the visa granting process.
Cheers,
Bev


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## twostep (Apr 3, 2008)

Day care for a toddler can run anywhere from $200 to ... per week. That does not include after hour penalties for late pick up or arranged after hour care. No day care will have sick children on the premises. Generally it is a phone call to the parent requesting immediate pick up. Without a network of family/friends a difficult juggle.

Dreamerkitty - 2000/month gross or net?


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## mtlve (Oct 3, 2013)

I would also be careful about going to Phily. That city seemed pretty block by block in regards to safety there. A local would be able to talk more about this. I am not sure where you will be working but I know that some areas around the main universities there are even pretty unsafe. 

As others said, daycares can be pretty expensive. Some coworkers in my last US city were spending 1000/month per kid for a 1yr old. You might look for a college student that could nanny or baby sit for you on occasion. Toddlers can get sick a lot in a day care setting, and they will not be permitted to go to the center when they are sick.


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## frank2961 (Oct 4, 2013)

On $2K a month (assuming you meant per month as opposed to weekly) it will be hard especially without help around. At $8K per month you'll be okay. Try around UPenn area in the city or Westchester (suburbs in Philly) or NW Philly. Good luck!


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## stormgal (Sep 30, 2009)

mtlve said:


> I would also be careful about going to Phily. That city seemed pretty block by block in regards to safety there.



I agree. I cringed at the fact the OP is a single mom moving to Philly. To me, Philly is a city in decline much like Detroit. It's a partially abandoned post industrial waste full of crime and cold grey skies. Better options would probably be Miami, NYC or San Francisco for single women.


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## jsharbuck (Jul 26, 2012)

I agree. Left Philly last year for New Zealand. Maybe the story of a single Mom being shot execution style while nursing her baby in a home invasion in one of the suburbs, or a man being beaten to death across the street from Independence Hall will scare you out of even considering a move there. Some people will tell you it's the greatest place they have lived and I am happy for them. Money will buy you a safer home in the suburbs.

Crime is high
Living costs are high
Very isolating , it's a who you know town.
Traffic horrible- possible road costs for turn pike

Please reconsider


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## jsharbuck (Jul 26, 2012)

Reading your post further, an unfurnished apt in Blue Bell was $1299 for a 1 bdrm, 1600 for a two bdrm. We moved to a townhome and paid $2,100. Cable and Internet was 250 combined. Electric was $400. Ez pass (toll road) $80 a month.
Daycare will be at least $500 a month.


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## emanken (Aug 1, 2013)

I pay $240 a week for daycare in suburban CT, I can only imagine it will be significantly higher in Philly


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## pericolo (Jul 29, 2013)

Absolutely, there's very little furnished, I had to go to corporate rental which is far more expensive than it should be, the only alternative I found is the classified webs, there's no much but you could find something, but you have to be aware of scams and bad landlords that just want to make as much money as possible
But digging deep you would be able to find something in the classified ... but don't expect much choice


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## jsharbuck (Jul 26, 2012)

Speaking from experience, stay away from private landlords. Try and stay with complexes. There are yard sales, Salvation Army, st Vincent stores fo buy second hand furniture


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