# Thai marriage and divorce



## somtamboo

Marriage and Divorce in Thailand: When Love Turns Deadly

I don't want to be cynical and suggest that most Thai marriages end up in a Thai divorce, but the stories in this link do make you shudder. Not just money-grabbing greed but outright cruelty towards someone who tried to give them a better life. What's that all about?

Do many Thai-foreign marriage end up like this? Are Thai divorces really that tough on the foreign party? I would assume most Thai marriages would tend to favour the Thai spouse in terms of financial settlements, so what drives some of these people to violence when they've already won? 

I don't have any experience of Thai marriage or divorce, but horror stories like this certainly make me think twice about getting that little slip of paper. 

Is there any way of protecting yourself before getting married here, are pre-nups worth anything? They do say most marriages start off in bed and end up in court, and I guess in Thailand there's a lot of temptation if the partners aren't financially equally to start with.


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## Guest

Yes pre-nups are recognised in Thailand. And in a divorce without a pre-nup, property bought after the marriage is often split pretty fairly. Still I've heard of some daft stories myself, including a couple I blogged about in Chiang Mai, the xxxxx (DON'T invest in a property in your future wife's name _before _you get hitched), and xxxxx, or how easy it is to get ripped off by wife and family. xxxxx, puts a more positive spin on things!

Sure the stories in the article sound familiar, but we can probably find similar horror stories all around the world. I thought the last paragraph summed up the real situation...



> While a small percentage of Thai women come from the bars and are focused more on money than love, the vast majority are not. Many marriages in Thailand do last and incidents such as scams and violence are extremely rare. Nevertheless, it’s wise to take precautions before entering any situation where property and finances are involved.


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## brianhouse

Well any marriage comes with a risk but a marriage between 2 different cultures between a Western stranger and an asian woman tends to raise the risk. Are there many thai men marrying western women? why not? Seems its usually an older Western man who has no skills in meeting educated well off Western women flying 20 hrs or so to meet a Asian woman looking for some kind of security which usually consist of a man with a steady income. Nothing too wrong in looking for something steady but if they don't speak the same language and havn't really became friends which can take at the minimum a year then its probably an arrangement between i give you money and you give me sexual satisfaction. With in time the income will not be enough and the sex is not as magical as he thought.


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## Guest

That's something of a caricature Brian. Sure, you'll get some guys that fit into that category (in other parts of the world too), butI wouldn't diss their relationship skills quite so quickly! Seems to me, as I hear that criticism quite often, that there's occasionally a certain amount of envy involved ...

Yes inter-cultural relationships are a challenge, and between East and West even more so because differences can be major. But I know plenty of people who have made it work.

Plus people are deluding themselves, wherever they are in the world, if they think that money/status etc doesn't enter into the equation, that marriage is all about love. You more or less said as much Brian, when referring to the quest for educated, well-off Western women, as if somehow this category is necessarily preferable to the alternatives!

Personally I'm delighted with my gorgeous, sexy, faithful, loving, jealous, hard-working, superb cook - and yes, relatively young - mother of my child!


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## brianhouse

*marriage*



frogblogger said:


> That's something of a caricature Brian. Sure, you'll get some guys that fit into that category (in other parts of the world too), butI wouldn't diss their relationship skills quite so quickly! Seems to me, as I hear that criticism quite often, that there's occasionally a certain amount of envy involved ...
> 
> Yes inter-cultural relationships are a challenge, and between East and West even more so because differences can be major. But I know plenty of people who have made it work.
> 
> Plus people are deluding themselves, wherever they are in the world, if they think that money/status etc doesn't enter into the equation, that marriage is all about love. You more or less said as much Brian, when referring to the quest for educated, well-off Western women, as if somehow this category is necessarily preferable to the alternatives!
> 
> Personally I'm delighted with my gorgeous, sexy, faithful, loving, jealous, hard-working, superb cook - and yes, relatively young - mother of my child!


Ofcourse marriage do work no matter the culture or income. I bed many inter culture relationships do work and are very happy. The happy ones might not be as vociferous as the unhappy ones. i Have no envy towards happy people. I myself am married to a Hong Kong woman after talking and becoming her friend for over 3 years before moving deeper and intimate with her.


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## Serendipity2

Personally I'm delighted with my gorgeous, sexy, faithful, loving, jealous, hard-working, superb cook - and yes, relatively young - mother of my child! 



Yes, but can she darn your socks?


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## 4thRight

Good thread. I am having trouble with most women on-line in two areas. One, the language differences are huge. I try to translate my English into Thai, then that Thai back into English to verify it says what I expect and I usually end up doing several edits and re-submissions to the on-line translator before sending. OMG the time it takes. Next comes the lack of quality response form the Thai women on-line. One in particular NEVER answers questions and never asks more than "when I be here?" I hate to discount such responders excessively but I am very open and adamant about becoming friends and having a good understanding of mutual expectations before either marriage or being partners. I wonder if being partners for a while is better than just jumping into a contract. That brings up the question of what we call Common Law and if living with someone for a period of time as short as 24 hours constitutes a marriage. Sheez! I don't know if I can afford an attorney. All I have is my Veteran's disability check, Social Security and a little from a divorce.


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## JWilliamson

Who says they have to live with you? They can stay the night or a weekend. Any more than that she must be special and able to add something special toy our life. JW


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