# Hostility Forum



## Suey (Jan 11, 2009)

Ok, people don’t bait me for this one!! but seriously, what is going on here, this is becoming more like ‘‘hostility forum’’, as opposed to ‘‘expat forum’’. What is wrong with you lot? Can you not have peaceful discussions, or arguments without name-calling, insulting each other’s education, intelligence levels, countries, parents, cultures etc? Some of you guys are sore losers! Seriously, some of you are a bunch of sad immature people.
At the end of the day, people are different and that is unvarying, so accept it. I personally would be more interested in learning about these differences and certainly not the insults.

When all is said and done, can this please go back to peaceful discussions that respect people’s cultures, religions, intelligence levels etc. Hence, more experienced, knowledgeable and educated people should educate us that know not, instead of throwing insults all over the place.


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

Suey said:


> Ok, people don’t bait me for this one!! but seriously, what is going on here, this is becoming more like ‘‘hostility forum’’, as opposed to ‘‘expat forum’’. What is wrong with you lot? Can you not have peaceful discussions, or arguments without name-calling, insulting each other’s education, intelligence levels, countries, parents, cultures etc? Some of you guys are sore losers! Seriously, some of you are a bunch of sad immature people.
> At the end of the day, people are different and that is unvarying, so accept it. I personally would be more interested in learning about these differences and certainly not the insults.
> 
> When all is said and done, can this please go back to peaceful discussions that respect people’s cultures, religions, intelligence levels etc. Hence, more experienced, knowledgeable and educated people should educate us that know not, instead of throwing insults all over the place.


I totally agree, it only seems to be the "Dubai Forum" that has any real trouble and its fairly recent. Its such a shame on what is otherwise a great place. I guess the only thing to do is press the ignore button on those posters who seem to be deliberately objectionable, that way you dont get to see what they write and they get ignored and go away eventually?????

Jo xxx


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## mrbig (Sep 10, 2009)

I love you all no matter what. Even my chap Andy Capp! Hey Andy want to meet at the beach this weekend so we can show off the jeeps?


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## Suenneil (Feb 17, 2009)

:clap2::clap2: I agree completely .... sometimes, although it may seem harder to do at the time, its more productive to be even nicer back to the people who arent so nice! (Ive done it more than once on the Spain forum!!) .... genuine nasty, obnoxious people cant really cope with "nice" ... so they usually just disappear or stop! ... sometimes they even realise they were being a bit stupid themselves in the first place and come back to apologise!

It can be hard to create an "all inclusive" forum but it can be done - and its worth it in the end because you then end up with a place that does exactly what it says on the can!!

Im sharing the love


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## Amnesia180 (May 13, 2009)

I agree with your post, and this is not a flame - but the problem you have is that some of the regulars see the same post day-in day-out. It's exactly the same on all forums.

Whilst the majority are very helpful and knowledgable, there will always be a select few who are of the old-school and don't like any change.

We need to accept that there is a new breed of Expat coming to the UAE, and the days of massive tax free salaries in a land that has no problems is coming to an end. Whilst for us newbies, the positives far outweigh the negatives, there are a select few who want to blinker you into not seeing these positives.

Thankfully, the majority of posts display the positives and negatives, as not to lead you into a sense of false security. Whilst it's easier to say "It's not how it used to be, but still enjoyable and doable if you put your mind to it" some choose to say "It's horrible, don't come here otherwise you'll end up in hell".

However - the flipside of all this, is maybe we (the newbies) want our answers sugar coated and gold plated. Who knows.

Have I gone off-topic.


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## Suenneil (Feb 17, 2009)

Amnesia180 said:


> I agree with your post, and this is not a flame - but the problem you have is that some of the regulars see the same post day-in day-out. It's exactly the same on all forums.
> 
> Whilst the majority are very helpful and knowledgable, there will always be a select few who are of the old-school and don't like any change.
> 
> ...


No Amnesia ... you just forgot what we were talking about ! lol 

The issues you raise fall into the topic ... and we have this on the Spain page too - but we do think its important to
a) make every effort to give a balanced answer - good and bad should be pointed out - its only fair to the original poster.
b) try to be as polite as possible in giving those answers
c) try to take into account that even though we have heard it a thousand times before ... for the poster if they had the answer they wouldnt be asking the question in the first place

Of course you are going to get grumpy "old" and "new" forums members ... thats life we all have bad days ... even me . But I do think we can all work at policing ourselves when it comes to holding back from sheer rude, obnoxious, confrontational and aggressive posts / responses.

Sue x


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## Amnesia180 (May 13, 2009)

Suenneil said:


> No Amnesia ... you just forgot what we were talking about ! lol
> 
> The issues you raise fall into the topic ... and we have this on the Spain page too - but we do think its important to
> a) make every effort to give a balanced answer - good and bad should be pointed out - its only fair to the original poster.
> ...


I think you're right - I did forget what I'm talking about. 

And again, you're right in the way we should ideally try and respond to posters. I joined these forums to learn, not to argue. I also came to find out facts, to make my own decisions... not be told "it can't be done" which seems to be the attitude of some.

:focus:... again.


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## Dubai1 (Feb 2, 2009)

I have noticed that a lot of people over here think they know best.... because they have been here longer. Which in some cases is true, it is almost as if the begrudge other people the same opportunity to come out here and earn a living.....

Good post though..... agree!!!


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

Amnesia180 said:


> I think you're right - I did forget what I'm talking about.
> 
> And again, you're right in the way we should ideally try and respond to posters. I joined these forums to learn, not to argue. I also came to find out facts, to make my own decisions... not be told "it can't be done" which seems to be the attitude of some.
> 
> :focus:... again.


I've said it bofore, but forums are like pubs!!! There are nice ones and not so nice ones! Most of the sites on this forum are great, a good mix of people, some nice, some humorous and some not so nice. As regulars you soon work out which are which and who to listen to and who not to bother with. 

The grumpy ones need tend to be looking for a fight which can never, ever be won over the internet, so there is no point even trying. Sues right smother them with love cos maybe thats what they're looking for??? 

Actually, maybe forums are not like pubs, maybe they're more like psychiatric units LOL !!??

Jo xxx


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## Suenneil (Feb 17, 2009)

Dubai1 said:


> I have noticed that a lot of people over here think they know best.... because they have been here longer. Which in some cases is true, it is almost as if the begrudge other people the same opportunity to come out here and earn a living.....
> 
> Good post though..... agree!!!


Hi ... I think to some extent this does happen, but talking as someone who has been here (Spain) for some time it is more and more difficult to give positive answers to a lot of people looking to move over, look for work etc., and I suppose to a new poster that may be miscontrued as me thinking I know best .. or that I dont want anyone else to come over and have the same opportunities etc ... but that would be the wrong assumption to make. In the current climate I think it is important to tell the truth, even if thats all bad! because some people really do trust every word they read on here! and if we constantly painted a rosey picture all the time that just wouldnt be fair .... balance is everything.

I think going back to the original post though .... its the way in which we deliver our messages, and talk to each that matters here ....


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

Suenneil said:


> Hi ... I think to some extent this does happen, but talking as someone who has been here (Spain) for some time it is more and more difficult to give positive answers to a lot of people looking to move over, look for work etc., and I suppose to a new poster that may be miscontrued as me thinking I know best .. or that I dont want anyone else to come over and have the same opportunities etc ... but that would be the wrong assumption to make. In the current climate I think it is important to tell the truth, even if thats all bad! because some people really do trust every word they read on here! and if we constantly painted a rosey picture all the time that just wouldnt be fair .... balance is everything.
> 
> I think going back to the original post though .... its the way in which we deliver our messages, and talk to each that matters here ....


Sue, what are we doing in Dubai anyway???? We're supposed to be in Spain!!!

Jo xx


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

Dubai1 said:


> I have noticed that a lot of people over here think they know best.... because they have been here longer. Which in some cases is true, it is almost as if the begrudge other people the same opportunity to come out here and earn a living.....
> 
> Good post though..... agree!!!


I was talking about this with my OH today, before we came here our dream of moving to Spain was so very different to the reality. At the time, we didnt want to be told the reality, we wanted to chase our dream and not be put off! But its nothing like we thought it would be and we were told that by folk on the forum before we came, but we wouldnt listen "we knew best"!!!!! Its not bad, but it is so very different!

Jo xxx


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## Suenneil (Feb 17, 2009)

jojo said:


> Sue, what are we doing in Dubai anyway???? We're supposed to be in Spain!!!
> 
> Jo xx


Its part of my plan this week to spread the love and help out at the same time! We are all part of the same family at the end of the day 

OMG I sound like a preacher! Im going back to Spain now ..... x Sue


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

Suenneil said:


> Its part of my plan this week to spread the love and help out at the same time! We are all part of the same family at the end of the day
> 
> OMG I sound like a preacher! Im going back to Spain now ..... x Sue


hhhmmm, do we need to call for the men in white coats hun or have you been on the sangria already???

Jo xxxx


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## Suey (Jan 11, 2009)

@ Sue and Jojo, maybe Dubai Forum needs some of your love, keep spreading it please..lol…and this place is not that bad, I have not been here long enough, but I don’t mind it, I guess a place is what you make it.

:focus: @Amnesia180, there is nothing wrong with arguing, it just that it can be done in a polite way and not necessarily in an offensive way. It is okay to debate on topics, I guess that is what keeps it interesting. Of course you are entitled to your own opinion, you don’t have to take everything that is said here as gospel truth.

People can’t be held against the negativity in their opinions either; maybe it is from past experience or just their opinions which of course, they are entitled to. The point is when one doesn’t agree with another’s opinion, there is no need for hostility or animosity.

Yes, Suenneil I totally agree, it is the way that we deliver our opinions that matters, and there is no point in people feeling they are better than others just because of what they think.


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## Sonya664 (Dec 28, 2008)

Amnesia180 said:


> I agree with your post, and this is not a flame - but the problem you have is that some of the regulars see the same post day-in day-out. It's exactly the same on all forums.
> 
> Whilst the majority are very helpful and knowledgable, there will always be a select few who are of the old-school and don't like any change.
> 
> ...


Hi Amesia180,
Just wanted to say, what a well written post.
Nailed it with your words, I have heard these over and over again.

To All,
Still think this forum is excellent daily reading and extremley informative for newbies or those thinking of moving over. 

S x


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## Andy Capp (Oct 5, 2008)

9 out of the 16 posts on here have been posted my moderators.....

As an aside, those of us who have been here (in Dubai) for a while and have had experience with the various departments etc. and the whole kit and caboodle of being here do get seriously peeved that some wet off the 'plane thinks they know better, sorry, but usually they don't.

And then there's the antagonistic ones who have a chip on their shoulder that basically come here to create - not solve - problems.

I have no time for those people and react accordingly.

Oh and yes, i know, i pi$$ a lot of people off.....

(But I do love Suey....)


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

Andy Capp said:


> 9 out of the 16 posts on here have been posted my moderators.....


Yeah, why is that, seriously. Even us mods from Spain came all the way over to join in ???????

Jo xxx


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## Andy Capp (Oct 5, 2008)

jojo said:


> Yeah, why is that, seriously. Even us mods from Spain came all the way over to join in ???????
> 
> Jo xxx


Yeah, you're just jealous cos you would love to be in a tax free totalitarian state with the longest driver-less metro systems (why do they need windscreen wipers on the trains), the worlds only 7 star hotel, the tallest building, the biggest man made islands - and one of the worst human rights records..... 

Gotta love this country!


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

Andy Capp said:


> Yeah, you're just jealous cos you would love to be in a tax free totalitarian state with the longest driver-less metro systems (why do they need windscreen wipers on the trains), the worlds only 7 star hotel, the tallest building, the biggest man made islands - and one of the worst human rights records.....
> 
> Gotta love this country!


Maybe?? I said once before I'm quite interested in Dubai, but it would be too far away from the UK and I've got older kids there who I'd miss. Spains just an couple of hours on a plane. I wanna visit Dubai tho, I would imagine that its worlds apart from Spain. Sun, palm trees and sandy beaches would probably be where any similarities end!?

Jo xxx


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## Andy Capp (Oct 5, 2008)

jojo said:


> . Sun, palm trees and sandy beaches would probably be where any similarities end!?
> Jo xxx


Erm, yes....

However, if you go to Bar-nasty (Barasti) at le meridien mina seyahi, you could almost be in a Spanish tapas bar.

Apart from the food is served by Filipinos, cooked by Indians and tastes like camel poo!

It ain't gambas al ajillo....

And it's bloody expensive - but hey, we can afford AED35 - 7 euro a beer cos we're living the dream eh?????


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

Andy Capp said:


> And it's bloody expensive - but het, we can afford AED35 - 7 euro a beer cos we're living the dream eh?????



HOW MUCH ????????


Jo xxx


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## Andy Capp (Oct 5, 2008)

jojo said:


> HOW MUCH ????????
> 
> 
> Jo xxx


Yep!

Exactly - that's why i drink in the dive bars of bur dubai - it's half the price there!

Don't believe the hype, it's not a cheap place to live here!

(How the hell I've managed 5 years is a bit of a concern.....)


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

Andy Capp said:


> Yep!
> 
> Exactly - that's why i drink in the dive bars of bur dubai - it's half the price there!
> 
> ...


ah, well you need to get your butt over to sunny Spain, 1.40€ for a drink!!! 

Jo xxx


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## Andy Capp (Oct 5, 2008)

jojo said:


> ah, well you need to get your butt over to sunny Spain, 1.40€ for a drink!!!
> 
> Jo xxx


HOW MUCH????????

It was never more than a euro when i used to go there a few years back!


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

Andy Capp said:


> HOW MUCH????????
> 
> It was never more than a euro when i used to go there a few years back!



Well Spains turned all European now you know, it has to keep up with the rest of the union!!!! its a ****** tho!!!


Jo xxx


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## Suenneil (Feb 17, 2009)

Andy Capp said:


> > 9 out of the 16 posts on here have been posted my moderators.....
> 
> 
> As an aside, those of us who have been here (in Dubai) for a while and have had experience with the various departments etc. and the whole kit and caboodle of being here do get seriously peeved that some wet off the 'plane thinks they know better, sorry, but usually they don't.
> ...



Your right Andy ... but despite having the Mod Badge we are just like everyone else living and working here .... I personally dont just Moderate, and neither does Jo .. we get involved in as many posts as we can or feel the urge to  just like any other member of the forum (its just that we have to be more pc!!!)

Ive always liked the Dubai forum, I was doing some work over there (from my office here) so it often helped me out from a business point of view.

Sue xx :ranger:


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

Suenneil said:


> Your right Andy ... but despite having the Mod Badge we are just like everyone else living and working here .... I personally dont just Moderate, and neither does Jo .. we get involved in as many posts as we can or feel the urge to  just like any other member of the forum (its just that we have to be more pc!!!)
> 
> Ive always liked the Dubai forum, I was doing some work over there (from my office here) so it often helped me out from a business point of view.
> 
> Sue xx :ranger:


If all we did was moderate, then we wouldnt ever need to write anything at all! 

I'm simply nosy and the Dubai forum is always busy and it seems to have some unhappy characters on it from time to time, I suppose its wrong to assume that Dubai is where unhappy people end up LOL?????

The best thing to do with people who come on the forum to antagonise rather than to ask questions or offer advise is to simply take no notice.

BTW Sue, I'm not following you around the forum... honest!!!! 

Jo xxx


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## D-Xpat (Aug 29, 2009)

Andy Capp said:


> ... that's why i drink in the dive bars of bur dubai - it's half the price there!


Damn drunk!


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## Suenneil (Feb 17, 2009)

jojo said:


> If all we did was moderate, then we wouldnt ever need to write anything at all!
> 
> I'm simply nosy and the Dubai forum is always busy and it seems to have some unhappy characters on it from time to time, I suppose its wrong to assume that Dubai is where unhappy people end up LOL?????
> 
> ...


 feel free I have nothing to hide! lol xx


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## mrbig (Sep 10, 2009)

I think d-xpat really liked you Andy. lol


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## Ahmad Bin Rashid AlOtaibi (Sep 18, 2009)

why so much hostility?


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

Ahmad Bin Rashid AlOtaibi said:


> why so much hostility?


There isnt any hostility ??????????????????????


Jo xxx


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## Ahmad Bin Rashid AlOtaibi (Sep 18, 2009)

read the first post!


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## jojo (Sep 20, 2007)

Ahmad Bin Rashid AlOtaibi said:


> read the first post!


I have and I've posted a lot of the subsequent posts. It was established that there was no hostility, only people who like to try and start it. They havent on this thread! So no issue

Jo


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